It's Nothing
by Nezuko
Summary: [KakaIru, GenRai] Kakashi, returning from a mission, had sent for Iruka to meet him for a little R&R on the way home, but a powerful enemy has ambushed and done him serious injury. Ch 13: An important lesson for Kakashi. Rated for gore, violence, language
1. Prologue: Infinite Mercy of the CNS

**It's Nothing**

by Nezuko, Prince of Rats

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. Most of the characters and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

_Prologue: The Infinite Mercy of the Central Nervous System_

A small wooden structure, little more than a hut really, stood hidden within a dense forest in the mountains between the Land of Fire and the Lightning Country. Nestled in the shadows of the tall trees, it almost seemed to be a product of the woods around it, camouflaged physically and with genjutsu, nearly impossible to notice unless one already knew it was there, and almost no-one knew it was there. It was old, a field medic station left over from the days of the war between the Leaf and the Cloud, now fallen into disrepair, moss covering the wooden shingles of its peaked roof, grass and weeds thrusting wantonly between the cracked boards of its skirting porch. The remains of a path wound between towering cryptomeria towards the decrepit sanctuary, two stones etched with the character "pain" standing silent guard on either side of the door. In the gathering gloom of twilight, a heavily burdened shinobi silently approached.

"This is it, right?" he asked the figure he carried on his back.

"Unh," came the grunted reply. At least he was still responding.

"OK, we're almost there then, just hang on a little more. Can I let go of one of your legs for a minute? I need to make the unlocking seal."

"Unh." The injured man tried to tighten his grip on his bearer's back, but when the supporting hand left his thigh his leg fell limply, gravity's pull unresisted. A horror of pain tore through his abdomen at the movement, and only the barest thread of control kept him from screaming.

"Oh gods, I'm hurting you!" Shifting forward, he stooped to keep the man's weight centered over his own as he hurriedly formed the one-handed sequence of seals to allow them admittance to the old building. The injured man groaned, then gave a wet, strangled sounding cough; bloody froth spattered against the back of his helper's neck.

The door of the hut unlatched and opened as the shinobi finished the unlocking sequence. Preparing to enter, he quickly reached around to take hold of the leg he had dropped, doing his best not to jar the panting ninja on his back. But it was too much. The injured man arched backwards, his whole body suddenly shaking and rigid with spasms, twitching as he fell. A raw, ragged howl rose from his throat, a sound that seemed to come from the very pit of Hell. From the eaves of the building a startled pair of bats rose on fluttering wings into the night sky. Then, as Iruka whirled around in a vain attempt to catch him before he struck the ground, with the infinite mercy of the central nervous system, Kakashi blacked out.

ooo ooo ooo

**It's Nothing: Appendix**

Background for readers not familiar with _Naruto. _ Includes setting and cast list for _It's Nothing_, Japanese terms and jutsu, and a glossary_. Warning, contains spoilers for the manga and anime! I'll try to keep them as vague as possible..._

**Setting**

**Konoha (Hidden Leaf), Fire Country/Land of Fire** - Also known as Konohagakure (Village Hidden in the Leaves) the hidden city-state and ninja stronghold where our characters live. Technology and culture are similar to modern-day Japan's, with throwbacks. They have electricity, tv, modern clothing and foods, but no cars or airplanes, and no guns or large bombs. In this world, ninja function as the military forces of their nations.

Timeframe is a few years after the current manga. There may be deviations from Kishimoto-sensei's timeline.

**Other countries (Ninja strongholds are called Hidden Villages):**

Hidden Mist, Water Country; Hidden Rock, Earth Country; Hidden Sand, Wind Country; Hidden Cloud, Lightning Country; Hidden Grass; Hidden Rain; Hidden Sound; Land of Waves; Land of Snow; Land of Ferns, etc. Countries that do not have their own ninja forces are protected through treaties with nations that do.

**Culture and Language**

**Attitude About Sex:**

Shinobi frequently die young, and having children can be a serious liability both to the parent and child. "Live for today, for tomorrow you will surely die" is taken very much to heart. For this reason, it is common for ninja to have same-sex as well as heterosexual relationships, and to conceal the existence of any offspring. (Borrowed from _Sharing Sake_, a short story by Paxnirvana, whose explanation makes perfect sense.)

**Names and Honorifics:**

Name order is Asian-style, with family/clan name first, personal name last.

Honorifics: Japanese honorifics are often translated as Mr/Mrs/Miss etc, but that isn't quite right, as honorifics are used with given names as well as family names. They serve to indicate the degree of familiarity and level of hierarchy or respect between people. When a character addresses another without the use of an honorific, it implies either a high level of intimacy (close friends, lovers, family members) or a high degree of contempt.

**-san** - basic honorific. Even an enemy might be addressed as -san.

**-sama** - indicates that the speaker has high respect for the addressee.

**-sensei** - used for teachers, artists, and doctors

**-kun** - used for male friends and peers or by a superior to a subordinate.

**-chan** - used for children, sweethearts, pets etc. and for close female friends.

**-nii/nee** - big brother/big sister

**Characters**

**Haruno Sakura** - 17 years old, Medic-Chuunin, apprentice to the current Hokage, showing great aptitude and skill as a medic. Formerly genin squad mate with Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke under Kakashi's command.

**Hatake Kakashi** - 31 years old, infamous genius Jounin of Konoha - became chuunin at age 6! (Typical age to become chuunin seems to be 15.) Has mastered over one thousand jutsus, in part thanks to his Sharingan Eye (see glossary). Physically manifests in his left eye, which was a surgical transplant from his best friend Uchiha Obito. He usually wears a stretchy blue or black mask covering his nose and mouth, and hides his Sharingan Eye under his hitai-ate. Mentor to Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke. Member of ANBU but undercover as "ordinary" Jounin most of the time.

**Kazuma-sensei** - Jounin, later Fourth Hokage, aka Yondaime. Kakashi's mentor and squad leader. Died 17 years ago while subduing the demon fox. (The Fourth's proper name has not yet been revealed in the manga, so I'm borrowing this one. Yondaime is called Kazuma in "Nakama" an excellent Naruto fanfic by Fanyar. The name Kazuma just seems to fit the character of Yondaime somehow; to the author of that story in which he first gained this appellation, I am indebted.)

**Kyuubi** - Giant, nine-tailed fox demon that terrorized Konoha. An immortal spirit, it could not be killed, but Konoha's greatest ninja, Yondaime, the Fourth Hokage, subdued it by binding it's tails into the navel of a new born baby 17 years ago, losing his own life in the process. That baby was Naruto.

**Pakkun** - One of Kakashi's spirit-plane ninja-dogs, Pakkun is a Pug who can talk.

**Rin** - Medic-chuunin. Squad mate and best friend to Kakashi. Killed the line of duty many years ago.

**Sarutobi Konohamaru** - 13 years old, Gennin. Grandson of the Third Hokage.

**Sarutobi "Sandaime"** - Over 60. Third Hokage of Konoha, reassumed position as Hokage when Yondaime was killed subduing the demon fox.

**Tsunade "Godaime"** - 55 years old. Fifth and current Hokage of Konoha. A legendary healer-nin with enormous skills. Looks much younger than her physical age.

**Uchiha Obito** - Chuunin. Squad mate and best friend to Kakashi. Died in the line of duty 19 years ago, during the war between the Leaf Ninja of Fire Country and the Cloud Ninja of Lightning Country.

**Uchiha Sasuke** - 17 Years old, Chuunin-level. MIA. Formerly genin squad mate with Uzumaki Naruto and Haruno Sakura under Kakashi's command.

**Umino Iruka** - 29 years old, Chuunin, teacher of ninjutsu at Konoha's Ninja Academy. Former teacher of Kakashi's gennin squad. Has a broad scar crossing the bridge of his nose and both cheeks. Orphaned at age 12 when both of his ninja parents were killed fighting the demon fox.

**Uzumaki Naruto** - 17 years old, Chuunin with immense potential and ambition to be more. Formerly genin squad mate with Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Sasuke under Kakashi's command. Has a demonic fox spirit sealed in his belly; it was imprisoned within Naruto at his birth by the Fourth Hokage in order to subdue the demon.

**Original characters for this story**

**Aburame Yumi** - 22 years old. Jounin, ANBU team mate with Kakashi when he was 21.

**Arashida Numa** - 54 years old, Medic-Jounin, originally from the Land of the Ferns, now a Mist Ninja, but currently working as a Neutral Medic-nin - sort of a Ninja Doctors Without Borders idea.

**Shida Akumaru** - 40 years old, Missing-nin, S-class criminal. Former Leaf Jounin, ANBU squad captain when Kakashi was 21.

**Surugaku Seiji** - 27 years old. Jounin, ANBU team mate with Kakashi when he was 21.

**Uchiha Akiko** - 23 years old. Jounin, ANBU team mate with Kakashi when he was 21. Obito's older sister.

**Glossary**

**Japanese Terms:**

**baka** - idiot, fool

**bito** - sweetie or similar endearment

**daijoubu** - it's alright. Can also be a question - are you alright?

**hai** - yes/agreement

**heno-heno-moheji** - a face made from the hiragana characters he, no, mo, and ji, and used for scarecrows, graffiti, etc. If you've read the manga, you've seen it on the back of the shirt of one of Kakashi's nin-dogs. (Kakashi means scarecrow in Japanese.)

**koi** - sweetie or similar endearment

**koibito** - lover, sweetheart

**magatama** - sacred, comma-shaped jewels

**Nee-chan/Nee-san** - big sister

**Nii-chan/Nii-san** - big brother

**Ryokan** - traditional Japanese inn

**Oisha-sensei** - what one calls a doctor when one doesn't know their proper name (otherwise it would be Name-sensei.)

**okaeri** - welcome home

**sensei** - teacher (you already knew this one, I hope)

**yatta** - I did it!

**People**:

**ninja** - warrior/martial artist (originally in Feudal Japan) skilled in theft, spying, stealth, assassination, etc. Feudal Japan's CIA types.

**shinobi** - same as ninja

**nin** - short for ninja

**kunoichi** - female ninja

**Hokage** - leader of Konoha village and highest level ninja.

**Jounin** - elite ninja, broadly skilled

**Special Jounin** - elite ninja specialist in a single area of expertise

**Chuunin** - journeyman ninja

**Genin** - junior ninja - usually recent academy graduate

**Healer-nin/medic nin** - ninja specializing in medicine and healing

**ANBU** - Secret, elite ninja force, handles assassinations, policing, ninja village protection, highest-level missions. ANBU members wear a different uniform than regular Chuunin and Jounin, and have their faces disguised by stylized animal masks.

**Things**:

**Hitai-ate** - forehead protector. Special-purpose bandanna with a metal plate affixed, worn by shinobi who have graduated from a Ninja Academy. Engraved on the metal plate is the symbol of the ninja's village - for Konoha it is a stylized leaf made from a spiral. Can be worn as a simple bandanna or unfolded and used to cover the hair. Kakashi wears his pulled down over the left eye, hiding his Sharingan Eye.

**Katana** - Japanese long sword, blade 24 inches or longer

**Kunai** - Basic ninja weapon. Double-edged dagger with a ring handle, used for throwing, hand to hand combat, etc.

**Senbon** - needle that can be used as a weapon or a healing instrument, depending on size and how it is placed

**Shuriken** - Basic ninja weapon. Multi-bladed throwing star, comes in many sizes.

**Wakizashi** - Japanese short sword, blade shorter than 24 inches

**Jutsu - ninja skills:**

**Bunshin no Jutsu** - Genjutsu that creates the illusion of a clone/clones of the invoker.

**Chakra** - combined energy of body and soul, similar to the concept of "ki" or "chi" from martial arts. It's used to power jutsu and various magical actions, such as walking on water, teleporting over short distances, etc. It can be exhausted through use of high-level jutsu, requiring the user to recover, sometimes resulting in complete collapse.

**Chidori** - Kakashi's signature assassination jutsu. He gathers and concentrates chakra in his hand in a visible ball of crackling energy, then rams it through his opponent at high speed. It is said that he once cleaved a bolt of lightning with this jutsu.

**Genjutsu** - illusion skill

**Kage Bunshin no Jutsu**- Shadow Clone kinjutsu, allows the user to create clones with real physical presence, not just illusion.

**Kata** - Hand and body postures used to invoke jutsu.

**Kinjutsu** - forbidden jutsu

**Ninjutsu** - ninja special skills and magic

**Scroll** - Written scroll for invoking certain jutsu, including healing and summoning jutsu.

**Seal** - Hand positions used to invoke jutsu. Sometimes include spoken words. May be one or two-handed. There are twelve basic two-handed seals named after the animals of the Chinese Zodiac.

**Sharingan Eye** - mirror wheel eye. Genetic ability of the Uchiha clan. Lets the user instantly and automatically copy and retain nearly any ninja technique he witnesses. User can penetrate and turn back upon the caster any genjutsu or ninjutsu.

**Summoning jutsu** - uses a scroll and the invoker's blood to make a contract with a being from the spirit plane, which manifests as flesh and blood when summoned. Kakashi is able to summon dogs.

**Taijutsu** - physical combat skill

**Jutsus original to this story:**

_Himitsu Kage no Jutsu_ - Secret Shadow Jutsu - allows the invoker to become invisibly hidden in a shadow. The shadow must be sufficiently large in composite area to contain the user's body, but it doesn't have to be solid. For example, a shinobi could use this jutsu to hide in the slatted shadow of a picket fence.

_Inu no Hana no Jutsu_ - Dog's Nose Jutsu - Briefly increases the user's sense of smell to the level of sensitivity of a dog's.

_Kanjouinyuu no Jutsu_ - Empathy Jutsu - makes your enemy empathize with you, losing the will to fight you, OR makes the target empathize with someone badly injured, so that the target feels the injured ninja's pain as if it were his/her own.

_Niku Katameru no Jutsu_ - Flesh Hardening Jutsu - When a weapon is approaching and can't be dodged, target diverts chakra to the area of the body about to be struck to reduce the damage from the blow. A potential killing blow from a sword aimed at the abdomen cuts through skin and muscle, but internal organs are spared. Sword strike that would have lopped off an extremity instead stops at the bone, bone may fracture, but it won't be severed.


	2. Good Job, Chuunin

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

... A raw, ragged howl rose from his throat, a sound that seemed to come from the very pit of Hell. From the eaves of the building a startled pair of bats rose on fluttering wings into the night sky. Then, as Iruka whirled around in a vain attempt to catch him before he struck the ground, with the infinite mercy of the central nervous system, Kakashi blacked out.

_Chapter 1: "Good Job, Chuunin"_

Leaning against the rough boards of the wall, Iruka yawned, then shivered. It was nearing midnight, and for the moment Kakashi seemed to have fallen asleep. A single, low-burning kerosene lamp cast long shadows through the room. Since it seemed that bright light could trigger the horrific seizures like the one that had pulled Kakashi from his back, Iruka had extinguished all but one lamp, keeping just enough brightness to be able to monitor the color in Kakashi's unmasked face: a ghastly translucent ivory.

It was clear that in addition to the obvious wounds on his body, Kakashi had been poisoned. Whatever vile substance his enemy had used seemed to pose the most immediate threat to his life, weakening him to the point of paralysis, and causing the periodic shuddering convulsions that seemed to be trying to pull his body apart. When a seizure came it would wrench the tall jounin's body like a terrier shaking a rat. His breath would be stopped by the force of the spasms, and the deep gash across his abdomen would gape, exposing pink loops of intestine under the gauze that Iruka had wrapped around him. Then, when the awful contractions released, blood would pour from the wound. Time and time again Iruka had changed the bandage, held pressure over the wound, directing his chakra into it to stop the bleeding, only to have another seizure rip away the fresh clots and start the cycle anew.

Worse, though, was seeing the anguish and fear on Kakashi's face when he was in the throes of a convulsion. Mercifully, he usually lost consciousness partway through, but it was clear that the torture was nearly beyond human endurance. After thirty minutes or so, in the lull between the storms, Kakashi would struggle back to consciousness, exhausted and in agonizing pain.

"Fight it, Kakashi-kun, fight! Don't let that traitor have your life, dammit!" Iruka whispered, staring in despair at the unnaturally pale face resting on the pillow next to him.

For his part, Kakashi was fighting, and he was fighting mad. 'Fucking poison my ass, I'm not gonna let you win this one from the grave, Akumaru-bastard.' Lying as still as death, he concentrated on slowing the flow of chakra in his body, willing the poison's violent grip to loosen, keeping the intolerable seizures at bay for as long as possible. Iruka had given him a shot of something that was helping with the pain, and the eased pain was helping him focus on neutralizing the poison's actions. '... where did Iruka get morphine?' his mind drifted. Iruka wasn't ANBU was he? No, that wasn't it. Had _he_ been carrying the drug with him on the mission? No, that didn't seem right either. Kakashi's exhausted and foggy brain couldn't seem to get his situation clear. 'He's dead, right? I'm pretty sure I killed him at the end there.' The pain in his wrist convinced him he had indeed rammed his chidori-charged hand through the man's armored chest. 'And Iruka didn't get hurt, right? I protected you after all, right, Ruka-chan?' He wanted to stay awake, talk to Iruka, tell him not to worry, ask him to explain where they were now. He glanced through a slitted eyelid at the drawn face of the chuunin, but the exhaustion was just too powerful. Cold. He was so fucking cold. Feeling like he was slipping beneath the surface of a frozen lake, Kakashi lapsed back into unconsciousness.

ooo

Jerking awake with a start, Iruka turned to see a short, dark-haired woman standing poised on the threshold to the room. She wore a plain black uniform under the white vest of a healer nin, but she bore no marks of allegiance that Iruka could see, though her facial features and coloring hinted at ancestry in the Land of the Ferns. The metal plate on her hitai-ate was unblemished and unadorned.

She looked coolly around the room, at Iruka, at the bloodied bandages and clothing strewn on the floor, at the prone figure on the pallet. Iruka saw her eyes widen slightly then - did she recognize Konoha's infamous copy nin? He tensed tired muscles, preparing to defend his fallen comrade from any sign of hostility from this woman. But she looked up past Iruka, fixing her eyes into the distance and recited,

"I am here under the Code of Neutrality. I am here under the Code of the Healer Shinobi of the Five Villages. My duty is only to those who suffer. My loyalty is only to those who seek my aid."

She turned her gaze to Iruka's face, "Did you summon me, Konoha Ninja?"

"Y-y- yes," stammered Iruka.

The healer nin stared up at him expectantly for a moment before prompting, "And do you seek my..."

"I, Umino Iruka, Chuunin of Konoha, seek your aid, Healer, for myself and my comrade, injured and sickened and suffering," The ritual words flowed over Iruka's tongue from the deep well of his training. He was relieved to fall back on the formal exchange; as he said the words, he felt a tiny needle of the anxiety that had filled him melt away. Someone who knew what to do was here now.

"Then I am here bound to do you no harm, but only to aid you if I may." She completed the ritual, then looked up again into Iruka's tired eyes. A concerned warmth flickered in her swampy gaze. She was older than she had at first looked, Iruka noticed, her eyes surrounded by tiny creases, her temples silvered. His own mother would have been about her age, if she had lived, he thought.

The healer nin was already brushing past him to kneel by the injured man on the floor. "It must have been a formidable foe indeed to have felled Hatake-sama." So she did recognize Kakashi. "Did you witness the battle, Chuunin?"

"Yes. Uh, most of it. I was under command to stay hidden." Iruka reddened, remembering the horrible helplessness he had felt while watching the jounin fight. "The enemy is dead, but I think his weapons were poisoned. I collected them, and his clothes, in case there might be an antidote."

The healer nin had turned Kakashi onto his back, and was peering into his right eye with a pen-light. "Smart. That may help indeed." She reached for the scarred left eyelid to pull it open.

"Stop." The guttural command came breathlessly from Kakashi's lips. His hand would have restrained the woman's wrist, if only he could have moved it, but the poison's paralyzing effect still held him. The effort it had taken just to speak the single word set off a new seizure, arching his back, tightening his hands into claws, pulling his face into a hideous grimace. The clenching muscles of his abdomen tore the edges of the belly wound apart again, pulsing fresh blood into the thick gauze bandage that Iruka had so recently changed. Kakashi's breath came in pained and shuddering gasps as he fought the drug-induced convulsions for control of his body.

Instantly, Iruka was kneeling at his head, cushioning it before it could strike the floor. "This is what it's been like, Oisha-sensei," he couldn't keep the note of panic out of his voice. Kakashi's strained lips were turning a slaty color as he struggled for breath. The wet gurgle of blood in his chest was terrifying to hear.

The healer nin deftly filled a syringe from a bottle in one of her pockets, then injected the contents into one shuddering, rigid arm. She produced an oxygen canister from somewhere, connecting it to tubing dangling from a hook on the wall, and fitted the prongs to Kakashi's flaring nostrils with one hand, turning the valve controlling the precious gas with the other. Almost immediately the injection began to work, the convulsions ceasing, body and limbs collapsing limply to the bedding. His breathing eased, and the fearsome grey tinge ebbed away, replaced with ivory pallor.

"Hmm. Well at least we know what class of poisons we're dealing with," she said, more to herself than to Iruka or her patient, who now lay unconscious and bleeding before her. She pulled back the twisted blankets and turned her attention to the wound on Kakashi's belly, first lifting the gauze, then pushing it back down and holding it with a firm hand.

"Here, come around to his side and keep pressure on this," she said, indicating the bandage under her brown hand. Iruka did as he was instructed. He could feel feverish heat radiating through the damp gauze from his friend's slashed abdomen, a sharp contrast to his own fingers, icy and whitened with worry and fear.

As the healer continued her survey, the sound of the oxygen hissing through the hose and Kakashi's wheezing breath filled Iruka's ears. 'Gods, what an idiot I am!' he thought, 'Oxygen. How obvious. Was it here? How did I not see it before? Of course he needs oxygen! How could I... I'm so sorry, Kashi-kun. I should have... I shouldn't have... Oh gods, Kakashi!' With the medic-jounin now here to take over, Iruka's facade of strength began to crumble. Self recriminations crashed like storm-whipped waves in his already agitated mind. He looked at his pallid, dying comrade, and knew it was all his fault. 'I led the enemy right to him! He followed me like a beacon! And I couldn't help at all in battle. All I could do was watch as he was nearly slaughtered! I... I... I'm... I've killed the man I love! I don't deserve to live! Please, please, Kakashi! Please don't die! Gods, let me change places with him. Let him have my life! If only I had...' Tears slid down his face, pausing at the edge of the scar that crossed his nose and cheeks.

"Looks like you know field medicine. You did a good job, Chuunin." The healer nin's words shocked Iruka out of his daze of self-loathing.

"I... what?" he replied, bewildered, turning his distraught face to her.

She was a little taken aback by Iruka's tears. The healer looked at him closely. Was he injured too? She saw that his left arm was bandaged around the biceps, but it didn't look serious. And the scar across his face was clearly many years old. He was young, late-twenties? and sweetly good-looking, though his chocolate brown eyes were full of pain. Something more has happened here than first meets the eye, she thought.

"You did a good job," she repeated, "You dressed these wounds well, even this chest wound, and these are tricky," she indicated the place where the enemy kunai had stabbed between Kakashi's ribs, "You undoubtedly saved Hatake-sama's life."

Iruka's mouth hung open. "No... I... that is..." More tears welled up in his eyes and his voice cracked and strangled on his words.

"It's OK, it's OK. It's going to be alright," she soothed. The young man was clearly on the point of breaking, and she still needed his help, if she was to help him and his companion. She needed to know what had happened, and how long ago. How much poison had gotten in, what medicines or healing jutsus had he already tried? And since this was clearly a surgical case, and he was obviously skilled, she could use his help with anesthesia and asepsis. She looked around the little medical shelter, appraising its facilities. No surgical suite, of course, but there was running water and antiseptic soap. The chuunin had already found and made use of bandages, and judging from a bottle and syringe lying on the floor, he had given the injured man morphine.

She looked again at her patient, sucking in her breath, then blowing through pursed lips. It really _was_ Konoha's Sharingan Copy Ninja, the genius Hatake Kakashi. The other leaf-nin hadn't corrected her use of the name, and there was the scarred eye and the way the barely conscious and grievously injured jounin had tried nonetheless to stop her from examining it... What a shock that under the silver hair his face was so young, no more than thirty-one or two, she guessed. She'd first heard of him twenty years ago at least, and though she knew he was still a child then, despite his shinobi status, she really hadn't integrated that fact. Now, looking at him and his soft-faced companion, it struck her again that she and her kind were in the business of sending children to war.

Iruka watched numbly as the healer set up and started an intravenous line, hanging two bags, one large with a clear solution, one small with something opaque and yellowish inside. He wondered if the bleeding had stopped yet, but didn't want to risk checking. The competent efficiency with which the woman moved was comforting. He couldn't save Kakashi, but maybe this woman could. His shoulders shook a little with fatigue and effort, and he suddenly realized how exhausted he was. How long had it been since the attack? Twelve hours by the clock, it seemed so much longer, the previous morning an eternity ago. Had it really been only the day before yesterday that he had set out to meet Kakashi on the road home from his last assignment?

_END Chapter 1_

Japanese terms:

Oisha-sensei - what one calls a doctor when one doesn't know their proper name (otherwise it would be name-sensei.)

koibito - lover, sweetheart

Other notes:

These are the effects of a real-world poison - I did my homework.

Timeframe is a few years after the current manga, so possible spoilers if you aren't there yet.

Attitude about sex (borrowed from Paxnirvana, whose explanation makes perfect sense. Read her short "Sharing Sake") - Ninjas mostly die young, and having children can be a serious liability both to the parent and child. "Live for today, for tomorrow you will surely die" is taken very much to heart. For this reason, it is common for ninjas to have same-sex as well as het relationships, and for high-profile shinobi to conceal the existence of any offspring.

Thank you for your reviews. This is my first fanfic, so I'm looking for both constructive criticism and encouragement.


	3. On the Eastern Tiger Road

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

... Iruka watched numbly as the healer set up and started an intravenous line, hanging two bags, one large with a clear solution, one small with something opaque and yellowish inside. He wondered if the bleeding had stopped yet, but didn't want to risk checking. The competent efficiency with which the woman moved was comforting. He couldn't save Kakashi, but maybe this woman could. His shoulders shook a little with fatigue and effort, and he suddenly realized how exhausted he was. How long had it been since the attack? Twelve hours by the clock, it seemed so much longer, the previous morning an eternity ago. Had it really been only the day before yesterday that he had set out to meet Kakashi on the road home from his last assignment?

_Chapter 2: On the Eastern Tiger Road_

The air was chilled and still foggy when Iruka left Konoha's gate at a jog, heading east-north-east into the rising sun. He was happy, no elated was a better word. Kakashi had sent him the message by dog, "I'll be on the Azumatora, meet me," signed with his little heno-heno scarecrow face, the mouth "he" character turned upside down to make a smile - Iruka could almost feel the jounin's rakishly suggestive wink in the strokes of the characters. He grinned thinking about it. Although Kakashi was three days overdue, he was OK; the dangerous solo mission was over, presumably had gone well. And now he was on the road home and expecting Iruka to meet him.

Well, his lover wasn't going to disappoint. The chuunin had hastily arranged to swap duty shifts in the mission room and cancelled his Saturday morning office hours - his students could do without him for a day or two. He was thankful it was a Friday when he'd received the message - of course Kashi-kun was considerate about that, he thought. On his way home he'd stopped to pick up a bottle of Kakashi's favorite sake, nesting two fragile cups into a padded pocket on his vest. He'd bathed and shaved and packed extra food and a change of clothes for Kakashi, who was probably feeling road-weary. And he'd left his apartment before the sun was up, whistling with happiness as he skimmed across the rooftops of the Leaf village. Kakashi was probably still sleeping under a tree and a genjutsu screen somewhere along the road home, he thought, smiling at the image of the sleep-mussed silver hair and masked, dreaming face under pine boughs.

The going was easy, and the first several kilometers well known to Iruka. He let the rhythm of his rocking hips lull him as he went, settling into a kind of moving meditation. It wasn't all that often that the chuunin got to spend time alone, outside the gates of the city, running with the wind in his hair, and he was loving it. He'd waved at the gate guards as he passed, chuunin like himself, just finishing night watch and waiting for the change of shift. "He's way too fuckin' happy for this time of day," groused one to the other as he waved the grinning fool out.

The sun had climbed into the lemon-yellow clouds and begun to burn them away when Iruka came to an abrupt halt, then soundlessly slid into the undergrowth along the road. A flash of orange caught his eye. Was he being followed? It would be just like Naruto or Konohamaru to try to tail their former teacher, especially if he was taking a day off for himself, Iruka groaned at the thought. He waited in tense silence, but heard only bird song and the early autumn breeze rustling foliage on the high mountain road. After twenty minutes, he began to noiselessly prowl the nearby forest, doubling back, criss-crossing his tracks, checking for any sign of another human, but there was none.

'I'm getting paranoid, working with troublemakers and pranksters all the time,' Iruka told himself with a sigh, 'It's probably nothing.' But as he started back on his way he employed a little more caution, his senses a little heightened, his muscles a little tenser. He was still within the Fire Country's borders, and he was pretty sure it was just his imagination, but he was a ninja, after all.

ooo ooo ooo

Iruka and Kakashi both spent Saturday night under the stars, one man tired but self-satisfied, enjoying a vacation day, the other bone-weary and filthy from days of travel and an exhausting mission. Kakashi looked down at himself as he settled into a natural cup at the base of a stand of pines and groaned. His body ached, his clothes were spattered with muck and blood. 'I reek,' he thought. 'Iruka will freak if I show up looking like this; a gore-covered assassin's hardly a vision of loveliness, even to another ninja. Maybe I can clean up a little.' He picked up a bent twig and let it twirl in his grasp, channelling his chakra into it as he directed his thoughts towards finding water. When he felt the twig twitch under his thumb, he opened his eye; pushing himself to his feet with a sigh, the silver-haired ninja followed its lead through the trees.

He was soon rewarded with the sound of running water, a thin mountain stream plunging over moss-covered stones between the pines. The water was bracingly cold on his skin and in his empty stomach, which contracted sharply when he swallowed a mouthful. He'd already stripped off his vest and top, the cool evening air raising goosebumps over his bruised, naked flesh. He squatted on the bank and scrubbed at himself with a wet strip of cloth. Bracing himself on his hands, he dropped his face into the rushing water, pulled out with a gasp, glittering drops flying from his dripping silver locks. Then, stepping into the stream, he let the water swirl around his shins, trails of rusty brown flushing away the evidence of his profession. His sleepy eye watched the snow-melt wash away his sins, but his mind was turned to more practical matters. 'Can't do much about my clothes unless I want to sleep wet,' he thought, 'but at least the worst of the grime is off.' His mask rinsed and refreshed, the bandages around his ankles washed out and replaced, the jounin stretched, then stepped back into the trees.

Feeling a little less wretched, Kakashi returned to his hollow near the Eastern Tiger Road and hid himself in a simple genjutsu: a passerby would see only branches and pine needles. Dismissing the idea of trapping and cooking as too much effort for too little reward, he settled for a chalky-textured protein bar from a pocket of his vest, his canteen refilled with icy water from the stream. "Gah, do they really have to make these taste _so_ lovely?" he wondered out loud, chewing his inelegant meal. Stomach satisfied, even if his taste buds were not, he lay down on his back, his arms crossed above his head, and gazed up through the pine branches at the silver glow of a waning moon lighting wisps of cloud in the early night sky. He made his mind deliberately blank, feeling for the chakra of the trees and wildlife around him, communing with it, embracing it. "I am a stone. I am grass. I am tied to the heart of the Earth," he meditated.

He lay long motionless in the soul-renewing trance, his visible eye staring unseeingly at the stars slowly revolving overhead. Then, with a yawn, Kakashi rolled onto his side, his back pressed against the rough bark of the tree. He flinched as his movement grated aching ribs, dragged raw, rope-burned skin through the dried, brown needles on the ground, shivering as the details of the last few days came crashing back into his consciousness. 'Get a grip, Hatake,' he chided himself, 'This mission is _over._ You're safe, and tomorrow, if you're lucky, you'll be with _him.'_

He closed his eyes and envisioned the dark-haired chuunin. His friend. His lover. Iruka was a good-looking man, fit and graceful as most ninja were, sexy and alive under his slightly reserved teacher persona. He was an imp with a wickedly dry sense of humor, and had been a real hellion before he became chuunin. Kakashi could easily see what bound the teacher to the fox-boy Naruto - they were two peas in a pod.

'Ruka-kun's damn good in bed, too,' he thought with a smirk. Wonder what his fellow academy sensei would think if they knew about the wanton, lustful side of their blushing, righteous teacher.

But it was something more that made Iruka so important, the jounin mused. The way he made Kakashi feel alive himself, alive and human and safe, even when he had just returned from doing the most inhuman of things in the name of duty; been the closest to Death. When Iruka greeted him with a crushing embrace and whispered "okaeri," Kakashi felt like a real person, like his life was really worth something. Iruka was there, laughing at Kakashi's stupid jokes, blushing at his suggestive quips, moaning into his passionate kisses. And when he woke up screaming, reliving old torture, panicked and sweating, Iruka was there to bring him back to the present, wash his face with a cool rag, rub his back like a frightened child.

It seemed unfathomable that Iruka could really be his, but he was. This good man, good to the core of his soul, somehow found it possible to love and accept Kakashi - a man who had become a ninja at the age of five, killed his first man at eight, lost his best friends, his family, his lovers - a man so bloodstained, so dangerous, that it was almost inconceivable to consider loving him. Perhaps it was because Iruka was also a shinobi that he was able to see past the mask to the real Kakashi. Bring to life the human being inside the untouchable genius, the joking slacker, the scarred killer. And because Iruka loved him, accepted him, Kakashi could begin, just a little, to forgive himself. He pictured Iruka's scarred nose, his smiling face, his warm, compassionate eyes, and with a feeling a little like redemption, he fell into an exhausted and dreamless sleep.

_END Chapter 2_

Japanese terms:

heno-heno scarecrow face - short for heno-heno-moheji, a face made from the hiragana characters he, no, mo, and ji, and used for scarecrows, graffiti, etc. If you've read the manga, you've seen it on the back of the shirt of one of Kakashi's nin-dogs. (Kakashi means scarecrow in Japanese.)

okaeri - welcome home

Other notes:

Timeframe is a few years after the current manga, so possible spoilers if you aren't there yet.

Attitude about sex (borrowed from Paxnirvana, whose explanation makes perfect sense. Read her short, "Sharing Sake") - Ninjas mostly die young, and having children can be a serious liability both to the parent and child. "Live for today, for tomorrow you will surely die," is taken very much to heart. For this reason, it is common for ninjas to have same-sex as well as het relationships, and for high-profile shinobi to conceal the existence of any offspring.

Thank you for your reviews. This is my first fanfic, so I'm looking for both constructive criticism and encouragement.


	4. You're Impossible!

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

It seemed unfathomable that Iruka could really be his, but he was. This good man, good to the core of his soul, somehow found it possible to love and accept Kakashi - a man who had become a ninja at the age of five, killed his first man at eight, lost his best friends, his family, his lovers - a man so bloodstained, so dangerous, that it was almost inconceivable to consider loving him. Perhaps it was because Iruka was also a shinobi that he was able to see past the mask to the real Kakashi. Bring to life the human being inside the untouchable genius, the joking slacker, the scarred killer. And because Iruka loved him, accepted him, Kakashi could begin, just a little, to forgive himself. He pictured Iruka's scarred nose, his smiling face, his warm, compassionate eyes, and with a feeling a little like redemption, he fell into an exhausted and dreamless sleep.

_Chapter 3: "You're Impossible!"_

Despite his night spent on damp ground, Iruka woke on Sunday morning in high spirits. The feeling of being followed had not returned, and though he continued to exercise extra caution in covering his tracks, he felt fairly confident that it really had been his imagination or a childish prank by one of his better students. 'Or _former_ students,' he thought with a wry grin, a blond, spiky-haired, impishly grinning face filling his inner vision unbidden. He pulled a bamboo-shoot rice ball from his pack and munched happily, offering thanks to the god of convenience foods for the foil pouch of coffee he washed it down with. 'Sure is great to live in modern times,' he mused.

He contemplated the drink container in his hand, 'I better make sure to save a milk-tea for Kashi-kun. I'll bet I can get a lot of milage out of it if I play my cards right.' He grinned deviously, planning _things_ to make his pet jounin do in order to get the sweet beverage.

'It's kind of funny, when you think about it,' he reflected, 'The ultra-deadly Copy Nin of Konoha sipping the genteel refreshment. I bet if you asked a hundred civilians to tell you what a ninja assassin likes to drink, not one would come up with milk-tea.' He laughed aloud at his train of thought, 'And they certainly wouldn't come up with the _way_ he likes it.' The memory of Kakashi's silver head bowed, lapping the sticky substance from Iruka's navel the last time they had played together made him feel almost lightheaded. _"... Look, Ruru-kun, your skin's the same color as my tea..." _Oh yeah, he was _definitely_ gonna get some milage out of it. Shaking his head to clear the distractingly delicious vision, and subtly adjusting his suddenly tight trousers, the libidinous chuunin stretched and shouldered his pack. The sooner he got on the road, the sooner he'd have the real thing in front of him.

With a glance back to be sure his sleeping place could not be detected, Iruka headed east into the morning light. Alas, his confidence that he had ditched his pursuers was undeserved, though not through any fault of his own. He was simply outclassed. A shadowy figure detached itself from the base of an evergreen near the road and melted into the flickering umbrage beneath the trees, keeping silent pace with the striding chuunin. "That's right, Fool, lead me to him."

ooo ooo ooo

The sun was high, and he was nearing the border of the Fire Country when Kakashi spotted a tiny silvery flicker in the distance ahead. His hands flew through the motions of the _Himitsu Kage no Jutsu _as he made himself one with the shadows of the fragrant Cryptomeria trees bordering the road. The Azumatora, the Eastern Tiger Road, was a military track, hidden and used exclusively by the ninjas of Konoha; there shouldn't be anyone on the road, unless... He invoked the _Inu no Hana no Jutsu_ and sniffed the air, hoping for - yes, there it was. A fresh, sea-salt scent, slightly musky, earthy, masculine, mingled with the sweat of two-days hiking, the pines he had slept under, the grass he'd lain upon, and a trace of smokey fire, the scent of Konohagakure. It was Umino Iruka, answering his summons, coming to meet him. Kakashi grinned up at the squirrels in the tree above him. Oh, life could be so good sometimes! He debated how to greet his lover. He could wait here in ambush and take him by surprise, he could rush out onto the road and tackle him to the ground, he could walk sedately forward as if he hadn't noticed the approaching ninja - not that Iruka would believe for even a second that that were true - Copy-Nin Kakashi not notice an approaching ninja - absurd! In the end his impatience to be with the object of his affection won out, and with a flurry of fingers and rush of murmured syllables, the tall, silver-haired shinobi teleported himself to a spot not ten inches from a startled Iruka's face.

"Gah! Ka-! Kakashi-kun!" Iruka's eyes were wide, his mouth hanging open.

"Miss me?" asked the grinning jounin.

"Well... yeah. Of course I did. Baka." He returned the grin, drawing out the sounds of the last word. Stepping back slightly, Iruka took in the sight in front of him; it wasn't too far from what he'd expected. The lanky, acrobatic man looked a little worse for the wear - clothes stained with blood, a purple-greenish bruise rising above the edge of his mask on his right cheek, greyish hollow beneath his visible eye. His hair fell in greasy silver hanks over the top of his hitai-ate. Iruka wrapped his arms around the jounin's muscular torso and was immediately sorry when he felt Kakashi flinch and suck in a rasping breath before hugging Iruka back.

"Oh, gods, I'm sorry, Kashi-kun! Are you injured? Did you break a rib or something?"

"Mah, mah. It's nothing. Just a little bruise. I'm fine." He pulled Iruka to his chest, tilting the chuunin's head down and kissing his hairline through the thin cloth of his mask. "Did you bring something to eat? I'm starved!"

"I can tell. You look like hell. When's the last time you ate anything decent?"

"Mmm - I think it was the night before I left on this mission, in bed with you, Sensei." His dark eye twinkled as Iruka blushed. "Ne, you're so much fun, Ruru-kun," he cooed, turning Iruka's face an even deeper red.

'You're not, "fine" though, you idiot,' Iruka thought to himself. He'd have to get a look under the jounin's shirt, and not just for fun and games either. 'I know you've got a fractured rib or two - you wouldn't have made that face for just a bruise.' He sighed. Well, that was the life of a ninja for you. And really, all in all he looked pretty good. He was now five days overdue from the mission, so something had probably gone not quite right. Given that he wasn't limping, didn't look poisoned or feverish, and was no paler than usual, Kakashi was in remarkably good shape.

"So, how was your trip?" Kakashi was asking, as he slung an arm about the chuunin's shoulders, heading him back up the road in the direction from which he'd come.

"Mmm, it was fine. Beautiful hike, great weather; I've always loved this road." Iruka grinned. "I had a bit of a rough start though - thought Naruto or one of my kids was trying to tail me. I thought I caught a flash of orange early on, but when I went back to look I couldn't find any trace of anything. I was probably just being paranoid."

"Oh?" Kakashi looked serious. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah. None of my current students is good enough to evade me yet, and even if it were Naruto I would have caught him if he'd really been there; that orange coat is such a dead giveaway." Iruka looked at his feet, a little embarrassed that his lessons in concealment had so stunningly failed to make an impression on the hyperactive boy. "I upped my stealth anyway, to be on the safe side. Took to the shadows and treetops, you know? If he _was_ tailing, I lost him or he gave up. It all happened before noon yesterday."

"Aa, good. Don't need any little spies around." The hand on Iruka's shoulder dropped down and gave his ass a squeeze.

Iruka licked his lips and smirked, glancing at his companion from the corner of his eye. "Don't tell me the great pervert Kakashi is concerned about corrupting impressionable young minds?"

"Hell yeah! You bet I am!" The tall man swooped down on Iruka, mask down, enveloping him in a predatory and possessive kiss.

"Ne, you need a shave, Kashi-kun," Iruka complained, squirming away when they broke for air.

"That's not the only thing I need..." The groping hand reached for Iruka again.

"Oh, you're impossible!" he grabbed Kakashi's wrist, then dropped it like a hot potato when Kakashi stiffened and hissed in pain.

"Let me see."

"It's nothing."

"Let me see, dammit!" Iruka, planted himself in front of Kakashi, glaring up into the taller man's face.

"Fine. Here." He held out his hand, palm up, "But I'm telling you, it's nothing."

Iruka bit the inside of his cheek to keep in first the angry retort, then the shocked little cry of empathy. His nostrils flared and his eyes widened as he took in the scabbed, crusted mess that was the skin over Kakashi's wrist.

"Give me the other one," he said through tight lips.

Kakashi sighed and offered his right hand to Iruka as well.

"What the fuck did they tie you up with?" he demanded.

"Rope."

"Rope doesn't do this!"

"Rope studded with broken glass." Kakashi's voice was soft, almost apologetic.

"How'd you get away?" Iruka asked more quietly

"I... Do we have to talk about it right now?" His voice was a near whisper.

Iruka said nothing, staring at the ugly wounds. He kicked himself for having asked. It was obvious Kakashi didn't want to, wasn't ready to talk about it. He wanted to take the man in his arms, but was afraid to, afraid of hurting him again, afraid it would be the wrong thing to do.

"Iruka."

No response.

"Iruka, look at me."

Liquid brown eyes wrenched away from the ravaged wrists to look up at their quiet owner.

"I'm o.k. Really." More firmly, "Really." A pause, then very quietly, "Are you mad at me?"

"Mad at you? Gods no, why would I be...?" Iruka was completely unprepared for the question. If anything, it would have been Kakashi's place to be angry, not his.

"Then, could you... uh... fix me up a little? You know?" he offered the damaged wrists to his lover.

"Oh, gods, Kakashi. Of course. Hang on, let's sit down for a minute."

They ambled towards the edge of a sunny clearing near the road. Kakashi perched on a fallen log while Iruka squatted on the grass and opened his knapsack.

"No wonder you weren't wearing your gloves."

"Hnh, yeah." Kakashi snorted. "You noticed that, did you? Pretty good." He kissed the top of Iruka's head. "For a chuunin." He winked.

"Jerk. You want me to use alcohol to clean those?"

"Sadist." Kakashi grinned. He was relieved he'd been able to cajole Iruka back into a better mood. If he was threatening him then he couldn't be too mad. He'd known the wrists weren't going to go over too well, and he doubted his cracked ribs were going to win him joyous smiles from his lover either. He tried to put himself in Iruka's shoes. Fucking Hell! If Iruka ever showed up from a mission, (thank god he didn't have to go on many missions, what with being an academy teacher and all,) looking like Kakashi guessed he looked right now, well, he'd probably have to kill someone, provided they weren't dead already. So maybe... Was Iruka worried about him?

"Here, let me see again." Iruka knelt between his legs, having pulled a first-aid kit from his pack and dug out salve and bandages. He winced, looking again at the mangled flesh.

"Yeah, pretty icky, huh? I'm gonna have to remember that trick. Glass in the ropes." Kakashi sounded nonchalant.

"And you're calling _me_ a sadist?"

"Well, only for use on enemies, of course!"

Iruka spread the antiseptic salve thickly over the raw wounds, doing his best not to disturb the scabs. He glanced up, but couldn't read Kakashi's expression, the black mask back in place. The tense look in his eye was enough to tell Iruka that it did hurt, though, whatever the stoic fool might claim. He wrapped white gauze around Kakashi's wrists, anchoring it around his thumbs. "There. You can put your gloves on again, if you want."

"Mmm. After we eat. You did say you brought food, right?"

_END Chapter 3_

Jutsu (from my imagination, not in original source material)

Himitsu Kage no Jutsu - Secret Shadow Jutsu - allows the invoker to become invisibly hidden in a shadow. The shadow must be sufficiently large in composite area to contain the user's body, but it doesn't have to be solid. For example, a shinobi could use this jutsu to hide in the slatted shadow of a picket fence.

Inu no Hana no Jutsu - Dog's Nose Jutsu - Briefly increases the user's sense of smell to the level of sensitivity of a dog's.

Japanese words:

Baka - idiot, fool

Sensei - teacher (you already knew this one, I hope)

Hitai-ate - forehead protector. In Kishimoto-sensei's world, this is a special-purpose bandanna with a metal plate affixed, worn by all adult shinobi who have graduated from a Ninja Academy. Engraved on the metal plate is the symbol of the ninja's village - for Konoha it is a leaf made from a spiral. Kakashi wears his pulled down over the left eye, hiding his Sharingan Eye.

Other notes:

Timeframe is a few years after the current manga, so possible spoilers if you aren't there yet.

Attitude about sex (borrowed from Paxnirvana, whose explanation makes perfect sense. Read her short, "Sharing Sake") - Ninjas mostly die young, and having children can be a serious liability both to the parent and child. "Live for today, for tomorrow you will surely die," is taken very much to heart. For this reason, it is common for ninjas to have same-sex as well as het relationships, and for high-profile shinobi to conceal the existence of any offspring.

Thank you for your reviews, I am truly honored. I had no idea how exciting it would be to know that someone is reading, and likes, my writing! Please feel free to offer specific praise or criticism. This is my first fanfic, in fact, my first major work of fiction. Prior to this I wrote only poetry and essays.


	5. Shida Akumaru

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

"Here, let me see again." Iruka knelt between his legs, having pulled a first-aid kit from his pack and dug out salve and bandages. He winced, looking again at the mangled flesh.

"Yeah, pretty icky, huh? I'm gonna have to remember that trick. Glass in the ropes." Kakashi sounded nonchalant.

"And you're calling _me_ a sadist?"

"Well, only for use on enemies, of course!"

Iruka spread the antiseptic salve thickly over the raw wounds, doing his best not to disturb the scabs. He glanced up, but couldn't read Kakashi's expression, the black mask back in place. The tense look in his eye was enough to tell Iruka that it did hurt, though, whatever the stoic fool might claim. He wrapped white gauze around Kakashi's wrists, anchoring it around his thumbs. "There. You can put your gloves on again, if you want."

"Mmm. After we eat. You did say you brought food, right?"

_Chapter 4: Shida Akumaru_

While Iruka pulled packages and tins from his knapsack, a sumptuous meal to the jounin's hungry eyes, Kakashi let out a sigh of relief. He'd gotten past the unpleasantness of Iruka finding out about his mission-related injuries without the chuunin getting too mad; in fact he'd even patched him up a bit. He had to admit it did feel a hell of a lot better having the broken skin covered. 'Guess I'm still gonna have to explain how I got hurt, though,' he thought. 'Thank god Iruka gets it enough to let it drop for now. That can wait until we're safely back within the gates of Konoha.'

"You know, Kashi," Iruka said, his back to the jounin, "It's almost like a vacation! When's the last time you and I got to take a hike together?"

"Mmm," Kakashi agreed. He was leaning back against the log now, smiling face upturned to the sun's warm rays.

"Here, catch!" A soft bundle landed in the hands Kakashi reflexively held up.

"Clean clothes! Iruka-kun, you are a god of thoughtfulness."

"It's not just for your sake, Stinky-chan." Iruka wrinkled his nose in feigned disgust.

"Right," Kakashi drawled, "and this isn't a ploy to get me to strip for you either, is it?"

He was delighted by the flush that immediately crept up Iruka's face.

"Well, don't waste your opportunity, Ruru!" Making sure he had the chuunin's eye, Kakashi shrugged off his vest, then raised his arms to peel the sweater over his head.

Both shinobi gasped at the same time, one in pain, one in empathy. 'Shit! I forgot about my damn ribs!' Kakashi groaned. 'Well, too late now.'

Iruka, to his credit, managed to sound, if not unconcerned, at least not overly so. "Wow, that's uh..., that's gotta hurt, huh." Kakashi's milky complexion made the bruise stand out in sickening contrast. Purple and black blotches wrapped around his left side just under his pectoral muscle, trailing off in back below his shoulder blade.

"Well, it looks a lot worse than it is," Kakashi lied, knowing that they both knew it was one.

"Got any more surprises for me?"

"No, I promise." he held up his hands in a 'trust-me' gesture.

Iruka was silent for a moment, trying to work out what to say to diffuse the tension. With a flash of inspiration, he gave his lover with an innocent smile.

"OK then, baby, drop trou and prove it."

Kakashi gaped.

"Yatta! I made the great pervert blush!"

Kakashi chuckled low and deep.

"Iruka-kun, you really are a devil in disguise, aren't you?"

"God. Devil. Make up your mind, which is it?"

"Heh, you got me." Kakashi did as he was told, stripping off his dirty trousers and underwear and standing naked in the soft breeze. "Got your eyeful yet?" His dark eye twinkled.

"Aaa," was all Iruka could manage. Damn that man was sexy, even when he was beat up and looking like hell!

"I'm getting dressed now, OK, Sensei?"

Not waiting for an answer, he pulled on the clean boxers and black pants that Iruka had brought him.

"It's just a clean uniform, that's alright, I hope," Iruka found his voice again once Kakashi's lower half was covered.

"Yeah, perfect. I'm still technically on the mission, you know." He reached for the clean sweater, but Iruka stopped him.

"Let me rub some ointment into that bruise first. It'll heal faster, ne?"

"Aa. Be gentle, OK?"

It was interesting, Iruka noted, how much Kakashi really responded to little bits of care-taking. He almost seemed like a little boy sometimes. "I bet you were a cute little kid," he mused aloud as he smoothed the medicine over Kakashi's abused ribs..

"Ano, what brought that on, Iruka-kun?"

"Mmm, nothing. There, all done! Ready to eat?"

ooo ooo ooo

Iruka was midway through raising a cup of sake to his lips when he simultaneously felt Kakashi's chakra flare around him in a protective cocoon and the reddish earth beneath them give way. As they tumbled underground, he was aware of Kakashi's voice chanting a jutsu, the warmth of his body pressed protectively around Iruka's own. When the movement ceased, he found they were in a vaulted chamber created by the roots of an enormous evergreen, light entering in shafts between the roots where they twisted in and out of the ground. A faintly bleeding gash across his left biceps had apparently been made by the enemy shuriken that Kakashi now held up to the light. The jounin scrutinized the weapon, then slowly and deliberately pushed his hitai-ate up, exposing his lividly scarred Sharingan Eye. Kakashi turned to Iruka, his glittering, mismatched eyes staring hard into the chuunin's.

"Are you OK?"

"Yeah, it's just a scratch," Iruka held out his arm in proof.

"Good." Kakashi stood rigidly still, a look of deadly fury on his face. In a voice tense and dangerous he said, "Stay hidden. Be vigilant."

As soon as Iruka nodded in acknowledgment, the silver-haired shinobi disappeared in a swirl of vapor.

Iruka shivered. It hadn't been his friend and lover Kashi-kun speaking those words, but Konoha Jounin Hatake Kakashi, his superior officer, issuing a field order. He swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry. He didn't like the implications of Kakashi's second command. "Stay hidden" was Konoha code for, "Stay out of this fight for now," and might be given in many circumstances, especially when one wanted to keep troops in reserve. But "be vigilant" was special; it meant, "This enemy is too strong for you to fight yourself and too dangerous for me to protect you from. Watch this fight but do _not_ interfere; be prepared to destroy my corpse and report in detail what has happened here to Hokage."

Iruka was stunned by how quickly Kakashi had recognized and reacted to the threat, one he hadn't himself even perceived. He couldn't even be sure where the enemy had thrown the shuriken from, and had certainly not felt any threatening presence, but something had alerted Kakashi. Though he didn't doubt him, he didn't see how the jounin could have come to the conclusion that the enemy was too much for Iruka to handle with so little data, unless - did he recognize the enemy's weapon? Perhaps this foe was associated with the mission the jounin was returning from, though that implied a sloppiness on Kakashi's part that Iruka could not credit as real. He might seem lazy and laid back to the casual observer, indeed, that was part of his charm, but Kakashi was nothing if not thorough when he was on the job. You don't get to be jounin, let alone ANBU, without possessing a frightening competence as a ninja.

Looking around, Iruka realized he was in an old lookout bunker. 'Probably a relic from the Cloud War,' he thought. He peered between the gnarled roots of the tree where they rose from the soil, creating a ground-level peep hole for the hidden chuunin. Kakashi's enemy was standing in the clearing, looking like he had stepped out of a Konoha history book. He wore an old-style ANBU uniform, with articulated armor over his torso. His hair was covered by the scarf of his hitai-ate, the ANBU animal mask concealing his face a stylized mantis. Iruka shuddered in recognition. He hadn't heard this man's name in years, but there could be little doubt who it was. As if to confirm Iruka's dread, the man removed his mask and threw it at the ground, exposing his scarred face.

"Don't you fucking run from me, Hatake! You've already done that once before!"

"Shida Akumaru-san." Kakashi's voice seemed to come from nowhere, the honorific sounding cold and deadly. "It's been a long time."

Shida Akumaru. The name itself was enough to make most Konoha ninja's blood run cold. He had been a well-respected, if deadly, leaf-jounin. An ANBU captain. And then, one October night ten years ago, while on a mission with his squad, he had snapped. Massacred all but one of his teammates. The lone ANBU who escaped the slaughter, survived to tell the tale, had been so traumatized by the event that he hadn't spoken a word for the first two weeks he was back. That survivor, Iruka realized with ice in his guts, had been Hatake Kakashi.

"What are you doing here, Shida-san?" the edge in Kakashi's voice was unmistakable.

"Don't '-san' me, you motherfucker! I know what you think of me!" Akumaru's voice was tight and crazy sounding.

"Oh? And what would that be, _Shida_?" Kakashi stressed the naked syllables of the madman's name.

"_I_ wasn't _ good enough_ for the great Hatake-sama! Oh no, not ugly, scarface Shida."

Iruka was confused - it almost sounded like Akumaru had been in love with Kakashi.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Shida." Kakashi's voice came from somewhere overhead. He seemed to be moving through the trees, circling the killer in the clearing.

"So I just don't get, it, _Kakashi," _ Akumaru spat out the name as if it were a curse. "If I was too disfigured for you, what are you doing with _him?"_

Iruka blanched, did Shida mean him?

"Oh, your pretty little boy-toy led me straight to you. And he's got a scar across his face as plain as day. You know what I'm gonna do?" Akumaru's voice dripped with acid hate. "I'm gonna disable you, then make you watch while I cut that little prick into mincemeat!"

"He's got _nothing_ to do with this!" Kakashi drew a shrill breath. Then in a calmer, more deliberate voice, "You're not talking sense, Akumaru. I never liked nor disliked your face. You were my captain."

"Don't pretend you didn't know I wanted you, Kakashi. Everyone else did."

"Is that why you killed them?" Kakashi's voice was shaking with controlled rage.

Iruka heard the whistle of a barrage of kunai flying from several directions at once, aimed for the man in the clearing. His heart was pounding uncontrollably. The steel weapons thunked into the ground, a swirl of vapor dissipating where Akumaru had stood only seconds before. Before he could track the rogue jounin's movements, Iruka heard the ringing clash of steel blades. He turned towards the sound to catch a glimpse of the two ninja locked motionless, their blades kissing above their heads. He thought he saw Kakashi spring back, but the blur of both shinobi's motion was too fast for his eye to trace.

'Kakashi's got his katana,' he thought numbly. 'How did he manage that?' The remains of their picnic was still visible, next to the barkless log at the edge of the clearing where they had rested. 'He must have had the presence of mind to pick it up before he did that earth jutsu.'

The fighting shinobi materialized within Iruka's field of view again. It was the most terrifying thing he had ever watched: two equally matched, elite shinobi killers turning their skills on one another, but one of the combatants was his lover. Akumaru's words echoed in Iruka's head, "... your pretty little boy-toy led me straight to you..."

A flutter of white cloth next to his dropped knapsack caught his eye. The bandages. Kakashi was fighting injured. And tired from his just completed mission. As if to prove the point, Iruka saw Kakashi stumble, heard him grunt as a kunai struck home between his already injured ribs.

If I can't have you, then no-one can, Kakashi-chan." The madman's voice sounded almost tender, in the most terrifying of ways.

"It is not your place to make that decision, you murdering traitor," the silver-haired jounin's voice grew angrier with each word. Iruka watched his lover power up his chakra, hands flying through seals. Suddenly three more Kakashi's surrounded Akumaru. They circled in on him, chanting in unison, red Sharingan Eyes glowing threateningly.

It was going to be over, Iruka felt a glimmer of hope. But it turned to sour despair before his eyes. The Kakashi clones began to waver and shimmer, then disappeared. The real Kakashi was flying through the air across the field. He landed with a sickening thud on his chest, right arm twisted awkwardly beneath him, feet flying up behind. His katana flew glittering from his grasp to land in the grass beyond his reach.

Akumaru was already running towards the fallen jounin, his own katana raised high above his head, ready to strike the killing blow. Kakashi flipped himself over onto his back, a bluish light crackling in his palm. As Akumaru's sword fell upon him, he thrust his chidori-charged hand towards the man's chest.

Kakashi realized with a sickening jolt what his Sharingan Eye could easily see: there was no way to evade the descending blade. _'Niku Katameru no Jutsu,'_ flashed into his mind, and with what little chakra reserve he had left, Kakashi invoked the flesh-hardening taijutsu, protecting his internal organs from the cleaving blow. The blade struck just below his navel, slicing a long, shallow diagonal towards his right hip. The black cloth of his uniform offered no resistance to Akumaru's chakra-charged blade. Skin and muscle split asunder, but Kakashi's countering jutsu worked; instead of continuing through his body and ending his life, the blade bounced and skittered away as if it had struck stone.

_END Chapter 4_

Jutsu invented for this chapter:

_Niku Katameru no Jutsu_ - Flesh Hardening Jutsu - When a weapon is approaching and can't be dodged, target diverts chakra to the area of the body about to be struck to reduce the damage from the blow. A potential killing blow from a sword aimed at the abdomen cuts through skin and muscle, but internal organs are spared. Sword strike that would have lopped off an extremity instead stops at the bone, bone may fracture, but it won't be severed.

Japanese words:

Baka - idiot, fool

Katana - Japanese long sword, blade 24 inches or longer

Kunai - Basic ninja weapon. Double-edged dagger with a ring handle used for throwing, hand to hand combat, etc.

Shuriken - Basic ninja weapon. Multi-bladed throwing star, comes in many sizes.

Yatta - I did it!

Names and Honorifics:

Name order is Asian-style, with family/clan name first, personal name last.

Honorifics: Japanese honorifics are often translated as Mr/Mrs/Miss etc, but that isn't quite right, as honorifics are used with given names as well as family names. They serve to indicate the degree of familiarity and level of hierarchy or respect between people. When a character addresses another without the use of an honorific, it implies either a high level of intimacy (best friends, lovers, family members) or a high degree of contempt.

san - basic honorific. Even an enemy might be addressed as -san.

sama - indicates that the speaker has high respect for the addressee.

sensei - used for teachers, artists, and doctors

kun - used between male friends and peers or by a superior to a subordinate.

chan - used for children, sweethearts, pets etc. and by close female friends

Thank-yous:

Thank you once again for your reviews, I am truly honored. I think I understand now why some authors have likened reviews to highly addictive drugs. I very much appreciate any specific praise or criticism, as I attempt to hone my craft. This is both my first fanfic and my first major work of fiction. Prior to this I was a poet and essayist.


	6. Ten Years Before: The ANBU Mantis

**It's Nothing**

by Nezuko, Prince of Rats

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. Most of the characters and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

_(Edit: Improved timeline readability, fixed a couple typos. Deleted "Interlude and Appendix" chapter on advice from Isolde1, moved appendix to end of Prologue. Having problems with Document Manager removing my punctuation.)_

... Kakashi realized with a sickening jolt what his Sharingan Eye could easily see: there was no way to evade the descending blade. _'Niku Katameru no Jutsu,'_ flashed into his mind, and with what little chakra reserve he had left, Kakashi invoked the flesh-hardening taijutsu, protecting his internal organs from the cleaving blow. The blade struck just below his navel, slicing a long, shallow diagonal towards his right hip. The black cloth of his uniform offered no resistance to Akumaru's chakra-charged blade. Skin and muscle split asunder, but Kakashi's countering jutsu worked; instead of continuing through his body and ending his life, the blade bounced and skittered away as if it had struck stone.

_Chapter 5: Ten Years Before: The ANBU Mantis_

In the seven years since the Kyuubi had attacked Konoha and been at last defeated by Yondaime, the landscape had recovered remarkably. One had to know where to look to see the scars remaining where the giant fox demon had torn up trees by their roots, clearing whole hillsides with a reckless stamp of a paw, a careless sweep of one of his nine tails. On a sunny, crisp October morning, the rising sun on brilliant red maples set the hills around Konoha ablaze in a last, defiant gasp of color against the impending snows of winter. It was one of those days when it was almost impossible not to be glad to be alive. The blonde chuunin standing lookout at the city's South gate was enjoying the stunning vista as she sipped her morning coffee when the sharp-eyed kunoichi spotted something unusual: a lone ANBU making his way slowly up the road. She peered at him through binoculars - the man was making no effort to conceal his presence. The dog-faced mask obscuring his own was crookedly askew, and the white front of his chest protector was smeared with blood as if he had held a wounded body in his arms, but no other person could be seen. More shocking still, he dragged the tip of his sheathed katana along the ground, occasionally seeming to lean on it for support, then wobbling away with shaky steps. He seemed to be on the verge of collapse. From his belt hung three more animal masks, all smeared with the same crimson that besmirched his uniform.

The chuunin called the alarm as soon as she realized what she was seeing, then raised the field glasses to her eyes again to watch the ANBU's agonizing approach. Her instincts told her to rush to the aid of her apparently stricken colleague, but she could not abandon her post. She followed his progress with worried impatience, waiting for the support team to answer her summons. "Where _are_ those bastards?" she muttered under her breath. The man stumbled, and she was sure he was going down, when the responding ANBU medics finally appeared, catching the falling ninja before he could hit the ground. A sudden whirlwind filled with leaves materialized, surrounding the figures in the road; when they cleared, the road was empty. "Great. Guess I'll never know what happened. Hope that guy's alright," the woman sighed to herself. But three weeks later she would find out, along with the rest of Konoha's ninja population, when Sandaime broke the news: Shida Akumaru, Konoha Jounin, the Mantis of ANBU, was a Missing-Nin, a traitor to his village, and the murderer of three of Konoha's ablest shinobi, his own ANBU subordinates.

ooo ooo ooo

The previous afternoon, in the mission lounge at ANBU's headquarters, a team of Konoha's skilled assassins were relaxing in each other's company, waiting for their next assignment. Three of them were draped around a small table, drinking green tea; their fourth teammate lazed across a beat-up leather couch, reading. The squad's leader was busily discussing the upcoming mission with the Hokage in the prep room next door.

"Old Scarface's got it bad, huh?" The curly-haired jounin flicked his eyes in the direction of their captain, then across the room to their preternaturally pale comrade, who had his masked nose buried in a dirty comic book.

"Yeah, and poor Kashi doesn't get it at all." The kunoichi rolled her eyes behind small, dark glasses. "That's what happens when they make 'em chuunin so young. He can drop a man at fifty paces with a single jutsu, but he's got no common sense."

"Aw, don't pick on him, Yumi. Would _you_ acknowledge it if Shida were trying to get in _your_ pants?" The third member of their party took a long drag on her cigarette then blew the smoke upwards through her raven bangs.

"Hell no! He's a good ninja and all, and a decent commander, but he's _creepy,_ ne?"

"You're one to talk, bug girl!" The square-faced man made a creepy-crawly motion with his hand, and the trio of elite ninja burst into laughter.

The newest member of their squad put down his book and looked with one sleepy eye at his teammates. "Mah, who's Yumi-chan picking on?" he drawled.

"No-one, no-one. Go back to your book, Kaka-kun. We'll tell you when you need to pay attention." The dark-eyed woman waved her cigarette dismissively in his direction.

"Just so long as you're looking out for me, Akiko-san. I won't worry about a thing." Kakashi's visible eye crinkled up with his familiar, teasing smile.

"You ought to be careful, Kiko-chan, I think our little copy-nin likes you," their male comrade teased.

"Yeah, right, Seiji, I don't think so. He was best friends with my little brother. I only just got him to stop calling me Nee-chan when he joined our squad."

"You ought to be careful yourself, Seiji-kun," Yumi said with a wink. "Kashi's not so 'little' ne?"

Seiji's cheeks colored.

"Yeah," put in Akiko, "I've seen your eyes following him around in the locker room, pervy-boy."

"You were spying in the men's locker room and you're calling _me_ pervy, Uchiha?"

The door to the planning room slid open and a badly scarred face appeared. "Hatake, I need to see you," Shida's raspy tenor voice cut across the room. The lounging trio gave each other knowing looks as Kakashi uncoiled himself from the couch and made his way towards their commander. Hands in his pockets in his deceptively casual slouch, he looked as indifferent as ever, while Shida's eyes held a lecherous gleam.

"Can he really be so dense?" Yumi asked, once the men had disappeared behind the office door.

ooo ooo ooo

That night, in a simply appointed guest room of a rustic but traditional ryokan, Kakashi was carefully cleaning up the last traces of their targets' existences. He fingered one of the stolen scrolls that Yumi's insects had so helpfully recovered from the now-dead shinobi before the ANBU squad had begun their attack in earnest. 'I've got to remember to tell Yumi-chan how effective that technique was,' he told himself. 'First time I've really worked closely with an Aburame. No wonder they tend to keep to themselves - those bugs probably creep people out.' The chakra-consuming Kekkai Konchuu insects were both the parasites and the familiars of the Aburame clan, feeding from their bodies' chakra and in turn serving as the shinobi family's secret weapons. Yumi had sent a scouting party of her insect companions into the fugitive ninja's hideout for reconnaissance, but when the opportunity presented itself, she'd tripled their number and instructed them to relieve the criminals of the contraband scrolls.

There had been three of them, versus the five ANBU. They hadn't stood a chance. The mission had gone like clockwork, and now just the cleaning up remained to do. 'Typical,' thought Kakashi, 'I'm low-man, since I'm newest to this squad, so I get to clean up the blood.' The barest of hint of annoyance flickered across his placid, masked countenance. Forming a sequence of well-rehearsed hand seals, he made the job easier on himself by creating a couple of shadow clones to tackle the rest of the room. "Damn, Shida sure was messy tonight!" Kakashi muttered under his breath. Their ANBU captain had seemed particularly vicious in his assault on the rogue shinobi, wielding his wakizashi with an almost manic malice. 'I guess these guys deserved it, though,' he continued to himself as he used a fire jutsu to burn away a bloodstain on the tatami floor, 'they betrayed the village, after all.'

With a final look around to convince himself that no-one would ever suspect a bloody assassination had taken place in the isolated little inn, Kakashi dropped the _Kage Bunshin no Jutsu_, his clones vanishing as if they had never been. He was about to step outside and rejoin his teammates when he heard a muffled cry.

"Shida! What the fuck?" Akiko's voice was raised in alarm.

"Would _you_ acknowledge it if Shida were trying to get in _your_ pants?" the scar-faced ninja mocked. The large-framed Jounin pushed his insect faced ANBU mask to the top of his cloth-covered head. The left side of his face looked as if the skin had melted and run together, the shiny scar tissue pulling his mouth into a permanent leer.

"Shida-san..."

"Bug girl here wouldn't. She finds me _creepy."_ He gestured with a bloody wakizashi at Aburame Yumi's lifeless body lying sprawled across the sandy road, insects streaming away from it.

"Akumaru-san, please..." the Uchiha woman's ebony eyes darted between the wild-eyed face of her commander and the bloodied body of her comrade.

"What, you thought I couldn't _hear_ you?" His voice dripped with sarcastic venom.

Akiko backed away, silently slipping a kunai into her palm and forming hand seals behind her back. "You know we were only joking..."

"Too slow, Uchiha!" Shida's voice was close to her ear, a sudden sharp pain at her wrist. "Too bad you didn't inherit the Sharingan. Can't form that jutsu without both hands, can you?" He tossed something over Akiko's shoulder into the road, raising a puff of sand and dust at her feet.

Akiko gagged and lurched forward, staring at her own gloved hand lying palm up, bleeding from its severed wrist. Shuriken whizzed through the misty air in her peripheral vision, and she heard running feet. Shida grunted and stiffened as a single shuriken sank into his left shoulder just above the ANBU tattoo. Before she could react to Shida's momentary distraction, his short sword flashed before Akiko's pain-dazed eyes. He slit her throat. She fell to her knees, then rolled to her side and lay still.

Kakashi hastily formed the katas to invoke the _Himitsu Kage no Jutsu_, melting into the shadows of the inn's courtyard as if he had no substance. Edging silently towards the sounds of the disturbance, he flowed within the the building's shadows, the rough clapboards pressing into his back. He heard Shinji's shocked voice shout Akiko's name, then the ringing clash of steel. Heart pounding in his throat, Kakashi raced around the corner in time to see a headless body fly by him, neck arteries pulsing an arcing trail of crimson as it fell. He stopped dead in his tracks, holding his breath. Away from the shadows of the building, in faint moonlight, he could see the crumpled forms of two more bodies, one of them still gurgling and gasping through a slit throat. Standing over them was a large, muscular ninja wearing the sleek, blue and white uniform of the ANBU, the mask of a praying mantis pulled down once more, obscuring his disfigured face. Breathing hard, he held a dripping wakizashi away from his body, arched forwards in a tense stance. Shinji's stunned face stared from the grass where it had fallen, parted from his body by his trusted leader's razor-edged steel.

Shida straightened and looked towards the inn. "Hatake!" he called. "Kakashi-kun? Are you done in there? It's time we got going." His voice sounded casual, unaffected by the carnage he had wrought. The young jounin watched with horror as the crazed man wiped his blade on the grass, then stretched as if satisfied from a workout. "Come on, Kakashi-kun. We can't take all night here."

Kakashi felt paralyzed, unsure what to do. He stared at the dark dots swarming away from Yumi's corpse, at Shinji's bloodless, disembodied face. A choking sound from Akiko forced his mind into focus. 'I've got to get Shida away from them,' he realized. Thinking tactically, he molded a powerful burst of chakra and released it into a single, life-like shadow clone. He hated to deplete his chakra so extensively for a single jutsu, but the clone had to be strong enough to fool Shida's expert senses. The clone dropped the _Himitsu Kage,_ becoming visible, and stepped into the path. "I'm here, Shida-san," the cloned Kakashi said, acting as if the bodies in the road did not exist. "Come on." He jumped into the woods, leading Shida away from the gruesome scene.

As soon as he was sure Shida was far enough away, Kakashi dashed into the road. He knelt, taking Akiko into his strong but shaking arms. Blood gushed from her neck onto his trunk armor, dyeing the white material a vivid red. "Ka..." she gasped.

"Shh, Kiko-nee, it's alright." One handed, he pushed his ANBU mask away from his face, exposing his Sharingan eye. His chakra swirled in its carmine depths, spinning the little magatama marks in a hypnotizing spiral. He held the dying kunoichi to his chest and stared into her eyes, willing her passing to be swift and painless, offering her a hypnotic vision of comfort and warmth. He felt her chakra fading, her choking gasps growing faint. "It's OK, Nee-chan. Go be with Obito." Kakashi's voice was ragged, his dark eye filled with tears. Long after he felt the woman who had been a sister to him leave her body, he continued to hold her, kneeling frozen and silently weeping, surrounded by the corpses of his team.

The moonlight dimmed, suddenly hidden behind a scudding cloud, pulling Kakashi from his grief-stricken daze. He shivered a little in the cold October night, then eased Akiko's body to the ground. He gently lifted Yumi's body and placed it alongside Akiko's, then laid Shinji's headless corpse next to them both. He gingerly placed his friend's severed head back in position above his shoulders, closing the shocked eyes with a thumb and forefinger. Bending over the macabre pile, he pulled from each body their Konoha dogtags, then gathered their bloodied ANBU masks. He hung the masks from his belt, the trio of animal faces staring malevolently from his waist. Then pulling his own mask back into place, Kakashi set the corpses ablaze with a roaring fire jutsu, obliterating all traces of his friends.

Kakashi sped northward along the Serpent road, taking the most direct route back, racing to get to Konoha before Shida. He knew his _Kage Bunshin_ had led the commander further south, but it would have dissipated by now, exposing his deception. He doubted the jounin would be tolerant in his current state of mind. He was shocked, however, when he found Shida strolling along the same road in plain sight. If the madman meant to kill him, he certainly wasn't attempting an ambush.

"Shida Akumaru!" Kakashi's voice seethed with fury.

"Ah, Kakashi-kun, there you are." As before, Shida sounded normal. The familiar way he addressed his subordinate sounded friendly, even intimate.

"What. Have. You. Done?" Kakashi gritted the words out. In his mind he heard again the horrifying sounds he had witnessed from the shadows. The sounds of this man, a man they had all trusted with their lives as their leader, mercilessly torturing and slaughtering his comrades, himself unable to reach them in time to protect them. Kakashi was dangerously close to losing control.

"Nothing, Kakashi-kun," the Mantis-faced ANBU replied, his voice still mild. "Just got rid of a few pests."

That was all it took. Kakashi saw red, his mind consumed by grief and outrage. He rushed at the jounin, katana held high for a lethal blow. But his overwhelming passion betrayed him: his attack was unguarded. Shida's wakizashi lashed towards Kakashi, striking him low across the right hip and thigh. His own longer sword bit into his opponent's side, but Shida's specialized articulated armor deflected the blow.

He knew his mistake at once, cursed himself for having given free rein to his emotions. Kakashi's wounded leg gave way beneath him. Gasping in pain, he landed awkwardly, dropping his katana and clutching instinctively at the injured hip. Blood pooled around him on the dry, stone-paved road. He waited numbly for Shida's blade to end his wretched life, but instead of the cut of steel through his bones, he felt Shida's warm arms wrap him in an embrace.

"Kakashi-kun! Your hurt! How did this happen?" Shida's voice was high-pitched with shock.

Kakashi turned his still-ANBU-masked face to stare wide-eyed at the man holding him. He could see his own blood staining Shida's weapon, yet the man seemed unaware that he himself had wielded the thing. Shida had pushed his own mask up again, revealing his ravaged face.

"Hold on, kiddo, I'll help you." The endearment coming from Shida's lips turned Kakashi's stomach.

'He's truly mad,' he thought. 'Mad or possessed. Either way, I have to get away from him.'

He let Shida bandage his bleeding hip, tolerating the madman's repulsive touch for the sake of keeping his own body and soul together. Grinding his teeth in pain, Kakashi considered his options. He had to find some way to lead Shida away again, but he didn't think he had enough chakra left for another _Kage Bunshin_, and that wouldn't work anyway, since Shida already had the real Kakashi before him.

"Doing OK, Kakashi-kun?" Shida's voice was solicitous, gentle even. "I'm almost done. Whoever your opponent was, he's skilled with a blade. This is deep. You'll have to go to the hospital as soon as we get back to Konoha."

Kakashi grunted an assent to keep the man off guard. Unbidden, Akiko's dying face flashed before Kakashi's eyes. The Sharingan! That was how he could save himself! He pushed the dog-faced ANBU mask up, revealing his sweaty, cloth-covered face and mismatched, heavy-lidded eyes. Looking wordlessly into Shida's blue-grey pupils, Kakashi willed his Sharingan to life. He offered Shida Akumaru the thing he could see that the crazed jounin wanted most in the world. Himself. In the genjutsu he wove for Shida, he willingly went with the man, taking his arm and leaning against it. His eye glittered with red chakra fire, drawing Shida deeper and deeper into the dream. When Shida was hopelessly ensnared, Kakashi sent the dream of himself racing away from the man into the cover of the deciduous forest along the road. Shida leapt to his feet, away from the real man at his side, to chase the illusion.

Kakashi was spent. His chakra was dangerously low, his body anemic from Shida's blood-letting, his mind and spirit worn to a frazzle from the trauma he had suffered. With quaking hands, he sheathed his katana, then used the weapon to pull himself upright. Sheer will and nothing more kept him going, gave him the strength to drag himself along the road, in the direction of home. The sun rose, revealing his presence, but Kakashi had no will left to hide himself. His mind was a numb cycle of pull, ache, shudder, drag, over and over as he lurched towards Konoha. He stumbled, and the pain that shot through his hip short-circuited his brain. Black sparks flared before his eyes, and he felt himself falling, but he just didn't care anymore.

The ANBU medics who caught his limp body were shocked by what they saw. The dog-faced mask and silver hair of the genius Hatake Kakashi were instantly recognizable to them, as were the three faces of the animal masks at his waist: Aburame Yumi's, Surugaku Seiji's, and Uchiha Akiko's. Their blood-smeared presence on Kakashi's belt, and the three extra sets of dogtags he wore around his neck told a poignant and wordless tale. Three of ANBU's elite number were dead, one badly injured, and one, Shida Akumaru, was missing.

ooo ooo ooo

Two weeks later, Kakashi was healing in body, but not in mind. He lay in a hospital bed, staring out the window with a vacant gaze. His Sharingan eye was covered with a silk scarf, his nose and mouth by his customary black mask. The hospital yukata hung loosely from his lean frame; he had lost weight, his collarbones jutting out in sharp relief against his pale flesh. When he was awake, he stared out the window and said not a word. No one could break his withdrawn silence. When he slept, he cried out the names of his fallen comrades. His hoarse voice would ring through the hushed hospital halls, drawing medics to his bedside to sedate the agitated jounin. Two of them anxiously discussed their unresponsive patient outside his room with the Hokage.

"Hokage-sama, perhaps it is because of the Uchiha eye. Hatake-sama is not of that bloodline."

"I do not think that is the problem," the old man slowly replied. "His use of it undoubtedly led to the depleted state of his chakra when you recovered him, but Kakashi has succumbed to exhaustion from overuse of the Sharingan jutsu before, and when he had less control of it than he does now, without such ill effects."

"If he doesn't eat something soon, we'll have to tube-feed him, Hokage-sama." The second medic glanced nervously at Kakashi. She'd had experience before with traumatized ninja who refused to eat, and she did not relish the idea of trying to force this powerful jounin to do anything he did not want to do, no matter how debilitated he was.

"I will explain that to him," Sandaime replied. "I suspect he will comply with my wishes if I tell him to eat." Turning away from the healers with a swirl of his long white robes, the Hokage entered Kakashi's room.

"Kakashi."

The jounin's eye flicked over at the sound of the ninja general's voice, then away again.

"You do not have to look at me. Yet. But you must listen." Sandaime's voice was soft but stern.

"This has gone on long enough. It cannot continue." He paused a moment, walking closer to the bed where the unmoving jounin lay.

"You of all people know that to give up would be to betray the lives your comrades lost. To betray Kazuma's dream. Obito's dream. Rin's dream."

Kakashi continued to gaze out the window, but the tense set of his jaw under the mask told the Hokage his words were getting in.

"You are the one who said to me, Kakashi, that to bring meaning to their deaths you would live their shares of life yourself. You must do this for Yumi, Seiji and Akiko as well."

A tear trickled down Kakashi's silent face from his dark, staring eye.

"Look at me," the grey-haired old man commanded.

Kakashi turned his face to the Hokage.

"You must tell me what happened. Who did this?" Sandaime reached out and lifted the silk scarf from Kakashi's face, stared deeply into his frightening, mismatched eyes.

A single word croaked from Kakashi's parched throat, "Mantis."

"Show me." He held Kakashi's face between his wrinkled hands, focused on the whirling red Sharingan eye.

When the Hokage had seen all Kakashi could show him of the treachery of Shida Akumaru, he released the jounin's face, stroking his hair back from his forehead as if he were a fevered child.

"Thank you, Hatake Kakashi. You have done well. You are a true shinobi of Konoha." He patted the jounin's pale hand, which clutched the blankets over him in a painfully tight fist. "You must eat something if you are to recover, Kakashi."

"Hai, Hokage-sama. I will eat."

ooo ooo ooo

On a sunny October afternoon ten years later, in the aftermath of the second time Kakashi had crossed blades with his former captain, Shida Akumaru's dying body fell across Kakashi's legs, a hole blasted through his chest where Kakashi's chidori had rammed through his ribcage. "You know... this is what... I wanted... all along..." the dying man choked and spluttered, then continued in a gasping wheeze, "To... die... with... you... Kashi... chan." He choked again, then laughed, a grotesque sound. Then his body spasmed, and Shida Akumaru passed into Hell.

"I'm not going with you, bastard!" Kakashi whispered through gritted teeth. 'I never did, and I never will,' he thought, then faded into unconsciousness.

_END Chapter 5_

Japanese words:

hai - yes/agreement

magatama - sacred, comma-shaped jewels

wakizashi - Japanese short sword, blade shorter than 24 inches

More Names and Honorifics:

Nee-chan - big sister

-nee - big sister

If there are other terms or ideas that seem confusing in this chapter, check the Appendix for an explanation.

Thank-yous:

This took a little longer to write, I hope it was worth the wait. Thanks to all who reviewed, your comments keep me encouraged to keep working at this.


	7. After the Battle

**It's Nothing**

_by Nezuko, Prince of Rats_

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

_(Warning: This chapter is pretty gory.)_

On a sunny October afternoon ten years later, in the aftermath of the second time Kakashi had crossed blades with his former captain, Shida Akumaru's dying body fell across Kakashi's legs, a hole blasted through his chest where Kakashi's chidori had rammed through his ribcage. "You know... this is what...I wanted... all along..." the dying man choked and spluttered, then continued in a gasping wheeze, "To... die... with... you... Kashi... chan." He choked again, then laughed, a grotesque sound. Then his body spasmed, and Shida Akumaru passed into Hell.

"I'm not going with you, bastard!" Kakashi whispered through gritted teeth. 'I never did, and I never will,' he thought, then faded into unconsciousness.

_Chapter 6: After the Battle_

Iruka watched, horrified, as a fountain of blood and matter spewed from Akumaru's back where Kakashi's jutsu had ripped through his body. The former Konoha ninja fell across his opponent's legs, apparently dead, for he did not rise again, but neither did Kakashi. From his lookout Iruka couldn't see what had happened to Kakashi, only that Akumaru's katana had been descending towards him before the attacking ninja's body had obscured his view.

He held his breath, waiting to see if it was safe for him to emerge, desperately wanting to rush to his comrade's side. Kakashi's order, "Stay hidden, be vigilant," bound Iruka. If he went onto the battlefield too soon, if Akumaru were still alive, his apparent death a genjutsu or trap, then Iruka would endanger himself and Kakashi, especially since the crazed man had threatened him directly, and he would be in direct violation of a combat field order. He shifted nervously from foot to foot, debating his course of action.

On the field, Kakashi lay unmoving, his own and Akumaru's blood slowly pooling around their limp bodies. The first sense to return to the jounin was his hearing. The agonized moan of a mortally injured man echoed in his ears, but for the moment he could not place himself beyond an awareness that he was in a combat zone.

'Geez, why doesn't a medic do something for that guy?' he thought. He just wanted to go to sleep, and he couldn't with all that racket going on. 'Argh, shut up already!' He listened with growing irritation to the pained groans, which seemed to get louder and louder.

As his consciousness returned, so did his bodily sensations. He could smell the tangy earthiness of blood, and his inner ears told him he was lying on his back. An awkward weight sprawled across his shins and thighs, but he could not identify it. Lying still on the blood-soaked ground, Kakashi realized, in a strange sudden leap of awareness, that he was in terrible pain and that _he_ was responsible for the unendurable noise. Clenching his teeth together hard, he stopped his voice in his throat, the wail immediately dying away to a raspy whimper.

His new level of awareness was almost enough to render him unconscious again. Pain overwhelmed Kakashi's senses, his entire universe shrinking down and concentrating into an unholy fire in his lower abdomen, a needle of ice piercing his left side. He panted through tense lips, eyes screwed tightly shut, and would have remained locked in motionless agony, but a new sensation assaulted him, demanding immediate action.

Kicking Akumaru's body off his legs, Kakashi flipped himself onto his hands and knees, yanking his mask down just in time as he began to retch, disgorging the lunch he had so recently enjoyed with Iruka. Every heave of Kakashi's torso pulsed crimson spurts from the gash on his belly, thrusting rosy pink viscera through the widening slit in his flesh. The blue-black fabric of his uniform grew wholly black as it absorbed his blood.

Iruka stared aghast, frozen with shock and astonishment. No matter how tired or injured he was, Kakashi had enough chakra control, he was sure, to manage a bodily reaction as simple as nausea, at least until he was in a safer place. If he was overwhelmed by it so easily, it could only mean one thing: Akumaru had used a poisoned weapon of some sort.

No longer caring for battle protocol, Iruka raced from the dugout shelter towards Kakashi. He used every bit of speed-enhancing taijutsu he had ever learned, covering the grassy meadow in an eyeblink. When he reached him, Kakashi had ceased vomiting and lay twisted on his back and side, his legs sprawled across Akumaru's corpse. A silk-wrapped kunai handle protruded from his left side near the base of his rib cage, and his lower abdomen was slit wide open from navel to right hip.

That sword wound was the most revolting, horrifying thing Iruka had ever seen. It was one thing to watch the innards of your enemy spill from a gaping cut, or to inspect the anatomy of a corpse in the morgue, it was quite another to see a savage gash parting the white skin, the thin and lumpy layer of yellowish fat, the twitching purple-red muscle fibers, and exposing the shiny pink intestines of your own beloved, all dripping with his own vermillion lifeblood.

Bile rose in his throat and Iruka had to turn away, fighting to control his reaction to the overwhelming scene. He concentrated on his own breathing, in... out... in... out... steadying himself. Swallowing hard, he turned back to Kakashi, who lay unmoving but for the heave of his chest with each pained breath.

Kneeling by Kakashi's side, Iruka gagged again at the stomach-turning smell of vomit and blood mingled with the odor rising from the spilled contents of the dead man's guts. He gulped and blew out a shaky breath. 'Get ahold of yourself, dammit,' he told himself sternly. 'You've got to deal with this. Gotta move him out of the blood and filth or he'll get infected.'

"Kakashi?" He placed a tentative hand on the jounin's shoulder. Kakashi seemed to hold his breath in reply.

"I'm gonna move you a little, OK?"

"Yeah." Kakashi's voice was hoarse and ragged. His face was sheened in sweat, and his eyes remained tightly shut.

Kakashi held his breath, bracing against the torture of being moved. He searched deep within himself for the strength to direct his chakra towards the source of the pain, even while every fiber of his being screamed for him to pull his awareness as far from it as possible. He subsumed himself in the torment like an ocean swimmer diving under an approaching wave, seeking for the open vessels, slowing and redirecting his blood-flow away from the site of the injury.

Averting his eyes for the moment from his partner's gaping wound, Iruka wrapped his arms under Kakashi's armpits and around his chest, lifting his upper body as steadily as he could and cradling his head. He pulled his comrade a few meters across the grass towards a small rise, away from the nastiness of his own vomit and spilled blood, then lowered him gently, taking care not to let the open wounds come in contact with the ground.

While he held him, Iruka could feel the jounin's chakra flooding towards the grisly breach in his belly, stemming but not stopping the exsanguination. 'It's not enough,' he thought. 'He'll bleed to death unless I do something to control it.'

"I think I've got coagulating bandages in my kit. Can I leave you for a minute?" he asked

"Nnh, go," Kakashi replied.

Almost as soon as Iruka had turned his back, the poison in Kakashi's system made him retch again, the jerking motion sending waves of agony through his savaged abdomen. He fought the toxin's effects, but his already severely taxed chakra was waning, and the poison was strong and unabating.

Iruka dashed to the fallen log where they had shared their merry picnic only a short time before, and grabbed both his and Kakashi's packs before sprinting back towards his suffering partner. Kakashi lay curled on his right side, arms wrapped protectively around his slashed belly, coughing and gagging convulsively. When Iruka knelt beside him he flicked his eyes briefly in the chuunin's direction.

"Uhn... go... away..." he ordered before another spasm racked him.

"What the fuck? No!" Iruka retorted. What could Kakashi possible be thinking? He delved through his knapsack, seeking the same first aid kid he had used before their lunch to dress Kakashi's wrists, and pulled out a paper-wrapped parcel. His hands shook as he tore the package open and withdrew a large, faintly-greenish gauze-wrapped sponge. Squatting behind Kakashi, he slid one hand under his heaving side and with the other reached around, lifted his slashed sweater, and quickly unfastened his blood-soaked trousers. With the cloth out of the way, he pressed the sponge against the exposed wound, directing his own chakra into his palms, forming the best healing jutsu he knew for managing catastrophic injuries such as this one.

Kakashi continued to retch and cough, bringing up bile from his stomach and blood-tinged froth from his lungs, but his situation was improving. Iruka's chakra supplementing his own actually began to close the edges of the long sword wound, and the clotting jutsu and herbs on the bandage slowed the bleeding to a manageable ooze. Eventually the vomiting attack relented, and Kakashi lay gasping, pale and sweating in Iruka's arms.

"Uungh, sorry," he groaned.

"Sorry? What in hell are you talking about?" Iruka continued to hold the bandage in place with the hand he had wrapped under Kakashi's side, but used the other to pull a handkerchief from his pocket and gently wipe the jounin's face and lips. "And what was that 'go away' crap? Shida's dead; you can't be on me for violating the stay hidden order."

"No. It's just... it's gross. Shouldn't have to see that," Kakashi mumbled. His eyes were glazed with pain and his breath came in shallow pants.

"Yeah, and you shouldn't have to keep breathing it," Iruka replied with feigned lightness. "I'm sorry, but I have to move you again."

"Yeah. Not so far this time. Hurts." Kakashi shut his eyes again, and Iruka could feel him tense in preparation for the movement.

"I'm gonna wrap this first, OK?" Iruka dug a wide roll of bandage out of the still-open backpack one-handed without waiting for an answer. "Can you hold the compress in place?"

Kakashi pressed one blood-covered hand over the sponge in reply, and Iruka wrapped the roll of bandage around him, fastening it tightly over the wound He pulled Kakashi's hand away when the dressing was finished, squeezing his fingertips before letting go.

"OK, I'm rolling you onto your back and then moving you." Somehow talking through his steps was keeping Iruka calm, as if he were teaching a class on field first-aid. He looped his arms under Kakashi's again and dragged him to a clean patch of grass, not wanting to risk picking him up yet, knowing how badly it was going to hurt him to flex his abdomen if he did.

Once he had the injured man settled as comfortably on his right side as he could make him, Iruka studied the kunai sticking obscenely out of Kakashi's ribs. He touched it experimentally making Kakashi flinch and grunt a curse.

"Leave it..." the jounin said between gritted teeth. He was starting to pant again, as pain and nausea rose.

"You're still feeling the poison?"

"Nnh," came Kakashi's inarticulate reply. He shut his eyes and swallowed, desperately trying to keep from vomiting again.

"Kakashi, I think it might be in the kunai," Iruka said, his fingers again brushing the handle of the weapon.

"Aaagh! _Leave it!"_ Kakashi gasped, before his whole body convulsed in a spasm of dry heaves and choking coughs.

That reaction was more than enough to convince Iruka that it was indeed the kunai blade buried in Kakashi's side that was continuing to inject him with poison. He shut his eyes and visualized the anatomy the knife might be penetrating - lung, diaphragm, spleen, kidney - before grasping the handle firmly and pulling the weapon with a sucking shudder from Kakashi's body.

Bright blood immediately welled through the cloth of Kakashi's sweater. If only he had put his vest back on after he changed, had it on when Shida attacked, Iruka fretted, it might have deflected the knife point, or at least not let it penetrate so deeply. But it was much too late for that now. He pulled the edge of the sweater up, exposing again Kakashi's creamy skin and the ugly bruise that had shocked him before, now slicked and smeared in liquid crimson.

"Oh, your ribs!" Iruka breathed.

Kakashi lay in miserable silence, panting shallowly. His face was eggshell white and the edges of his lips were dusky, though his mouth was glossy and brilliant red with coughed up blood. In addition to the excruciating pain from the wounds from Akumaru's blades, his head was beginning to ache as if he had been struck between the eyes, though he could recall no such blow.

He dimly felt Iruka pressing something over his throbbing side, then the sharp jab of fingertips compressing his subclavian artery at the juncture of his neck and left shoulder. 'Must be bleeding bad,' he thought muzzily, unable to focus his mind through the shock, poisoning and pain. He was starting to drift, his chakra control shot and his stamina at an end when he felt himself shaken and heard Iruka's frantic voice shouting his name.

"...kashi! Kakashi! Wake up! Talk to me!" Iruka was panicked. He had managed to stop the bleeding and bandage the kunai wound when Kakashi had started to shake, his eyes rolling back in his head.

Kakashi struggled to the surface of consciousness, following Iruka's voice like a lifeline. He could hear the fear in his lover's voice, and that more than anything gave him the strength to pull himself back, to defend Iruka from whatever threat he faced.

"Nn, Ruka... s'wrong?" Kakashi's words came out breathy and slurred, and talking made him cough, bloody spittle filling his throat and oozing from the corner of his mouth.

"Gods, Kakashi! Don't pass out on me!" Iruka cradled Kakashi's upper body.

"M'OK... S'nothing... to worry 'bout..." Kakashi wheezed. "Jus' wanna... rest... little..." He closed his eyes again.

"No! Don't rest!" Iruka's voice was harsh, insistent. Kakashi had never heard such urgency from him before. He felt something hard shoved between his teeth, and a cold, fiery liquid filled his mouth.

"Swallow!" came Iruka's voice, again with that strange edge.

Kakashi swallowed, feeling the icy blaze burn down his throat and into his stomach. Almost at once he felt more alert, pain receding and consciousness returning.

"Where did you get... ?" Kakashi started to ask, but began again to cough.

"Your pack. You showed it to me once so I knew you had it," Iruka replied, applying his handkerchief to Kakashi's face once more. "It's ANBU stuff, right? How long will it last?"

"About an hour or so." Kakashi's voice was steadier, his thinking clearer, though his head and injuries still throbbed and he was having trouble focusing his eyes. He started to reach a hand toward his face, but the movement sent a jolt of pain through his body and he hesitated.

"What do you need?" Iruka asked.

"Cover my Sharingan. It's using chakra."

Iruka immediately slid Kakashi's hitai-ate down, hiding his left eye. "I should have done that sooner." he groaned.

"You were busy," Kakashi deadpanned.

Iruka stared at Kakashi unbelieving. "You... you're making wisecracks _now?"_

"What better time?"

"I don't believe you! You're on the brink of fucking death and you still tease me."

"Cuz I love you, (cough) Ruru-kun." Kakashi started to laugh but the chuckle quickly turned to a groan.

"Please just... conserve your strength. Rest for a minute" Iruka took the rolled up sweater Kakashi had taken off earlier from his knapsack and placed it under the jounin's head.

"Oh, _now_ I can rest?" Again a tiny chuckle escaped Kakashi's lips before turning into a grimace of pain.

Iruka looked at Kakashi with horror plainly shining in his eyes.

"I just want... to see you smile... Ru-chan," Kakashi whispered.

"I can't." Iruka brushed his palm across Kakashi's face, smoothing back stray strands of silver hair.

"S'OK." Kakashi shut his eyes.

_END Chapter 6_

ooo ooo ooo

_Author's Notes and Thank-yous:_

Didn't mean to leave this as a cliff-hanger again, but I can only write so much in a chapter and this one is full.

Thank you all for your reviews and encouragement -they definitely keep me going. Especially thanks for the compliments on my dialogs, my poetic use of language - a special effort of mine, and on my action and fight scenes. If only you could see how I agonized over them! Please continue to give me specific review feedback if you can, as it really fires my desire to write. I hope you will continue to enjoy this story.


	8. The End of Akumaru

**It's Nothing**

_by Nezuko, Prince of Rats_

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

_(Warning: This chapter is pretty gory.)_

"I don't believe you! You're on the brink of fucking death and you still tease me."

"Cuz I love you, (cough) Ruru-kun." Kakashi started to laugh but the chuckle quickly turned to a groan.

"Please just... conserve your strength. Rest for a minute." Iruka took the rolled up sweater Kakashi had taken off earlier from his knapsack and placed it under the jounin's head.

"Oh, _now_ I can rest?" Again a tiny chuckle escaped Kakashi's lips before turning into a grimace of pain.

Iruka looked at Kakashi with horror plainly shining in his eyes.

"I just want... to see you smile... Ru-chan." Kakashi whispered.

"I can't." Iruka brushed his palm across Kakashi's face, smoothing back stray strands of silver hair.

"S'OK." Kakashi shut his eyes.

ooo ooo ooo

_Chapter 7: The End of Akumaru_

Iruka straightened his back and stared at the carnage around him. A few meters away lay the corpse of one of the most notorious shinobi criminals in Konoha's history, a gory hole blasted through his chest the obvious cause of his demise.

To Iruka's left were his and Kakashi's knapsacks, the jounin's turned on its side and spilling its contents in a tangled heap where Iruka had dumped it searching for the little phial of life-saving liquid he knew Kakashi kept there.

In front of the chuunin, Kakashi lay on his back, breathing shallowly but steadily for the moment, his closed eye creased under a furrowed brow, and his mouth a grim line. His face was so pale it made his usually bright silver hair seem dark. The black banded hitai-ate covering his forehead and left eye looked as stark as an executioner's mask, and his lips were stained a garish crimson.

The stretchy fabric that usually covered his nose and mouth was crushed down in folds around his neck, wet with blood and vomit, as was his heavy uniform sweater. Shockingly white bandages soaked red with blood wrapped around his chest and belly, the pale skin of his torso between them smeared with drying crimson.

Kakashi's right cheek was mottled green and purple, swollen with the remnants of a blow to the face he'd received some days ago, reminding Iruka that there could be more complications to manage beyond the obvious effects of the jounin's fight with Shida Akumaru. The drug he'd given Kakashi would buy him some time, but what he really needed was a healer-nin, a hospital, someone with medical skills far beyond the first-aid Iruka could provide.

There were no words to express the utter helplessness and desolation that overwhelmed the chuunin. He stared unblinkingly, deep chocolate eyes riveted to the blood- and bandage-covered torso of his lover, hearing over and over in his head Akumaru's toxic words, "... your pretty little boy-toy led me straight to you..." His jaw quivered while stinging tears blurred his vision and ran down his cheeks.

"Ruka?"

He jumped at the sound of his name. Kakashi's blood-covered hand reached for his own.

"You OK? Bastard cut you." Kakashi grunted wetly, then continued, "Shuriken wasn't poisoned was it?" He coughed, and the metallic tang of hemoglobin filled his mouth.

"What? No. Don't talk so much, Kakashi. That kunai nicked your lung, I think." Iruka's voice was shaky and emotion-filled but in control. He held Kakashi's hand tightly and dabbed at his lips with his now blood-soaked handkerchief.

"I'm sorry, Ru-chan. Should've protected you." Kakashi coughed again and grimaced in pain.

"Please Kashi, don't..."

"No. Gotta take advantage... of the time the drug..." Kakashi's words choked off in a gurgling wheeze and he gagged, then turned his head and spat a slimy clot into the grass.

Iruka winced, feeling Kakashi's suffering as acutely as if it were his own. "Kashi..." he started, not knowing what he was going to say, just needing the reassurance of speaking his lover's name.

"Can you carry me?" Kakashi interrupted him.

Iruka was astonished. Hurt almost beyond repair, poisoned, and in a daze of shock, Kakashi was still trying to manage the battlefield, still thinking like the genius ninja commander he was.

"Of course, but where..."

"Old field station... few kilometers from here..." Kakashi closed his eye again, and panted open mouthed, fighting pain and nausea the drug couldn't touch.

Iruka watched tensely, wishing there were something, anything he could do to ease Kakashi's distress.

Kakashi shivered. "Cold, Ruka..."

"Aa, I... can you stand it for me to change your clothes? Yours are all wet..." '... wet with blood, 'Iruka finished to himself, not wanting to admit aloud the gruesome truth. 'Gods, how much blood has he lost? How much _can_ he lose and still survive?'

"Nnh, do it," Kakashi replied. "Then get Shida's... mask and..." he trailed off again into a fit of gagging coughs, groaning painfully when they abated.

"OK, but stop talking for now." Iruka rubbed Kakashi's hand with his thumb and waited for his breathing to ease before turning to their knapsacks and pulling out the pants from his lover's earlier striptease. That happy, playful moment seemed a lifetime ago. He bent over Kakashi and started to lift his hips to remove his bloodied trousers, but the jounin stopped him with an agonized cry.

"No..." he gasped, "Just the sweater..."

"Aah, I'm sorry!" Iruka was shaken by how much the small movements seemed to have hurt his comrade. "I don't see how doing your top's going to hurt any less, Kashi." Iruka bit his lip in frustration and anxiety.

"Not, but... Need it more. S'more wet..." Kakashi replied. He opened his heavy-lidded eye and looked pointedly into Iruka's tear-stained face. "It's OK, Ru-kun..." He started to cough again, but bit it back. "I know it's gonna hurt. Just do it."

Moving as delicately as he could, Iruka eased Kakashi's upper body off the ground and pulled the blood-soaked sweater over his head. He could feel the jounin shaking with effort, fighting to hide the torture Iruka was putting him through. He was stunned at how cold Kakashi's skin was, and at how truly strong his lover must really be to hang on to consciousness despite what must be overwhelming pain and shock.

Iruka gently eased Kakashi's arms out of his uniform top, then pulled off his soiled mask and tossed both garments aside. He balanced the injured ninja between his thighs, his silver-haired head lolling against Iruka's waist.

"You smell sexy, Ruka," Kakashi said in a horse whisper. "Wish I felt better."

"Oh gods, just stop, Kakashi," Iruka sucked in a breath that could have been a sob.

"What?" Kakashi tried to lift his head, to look into Iruka's face. "I mean it."

"I know, Ka-chan, I know," Iruka managed. 'And that's why it hurts,' he thought. 'Seeing you struggle to pretend this isn't so bad, to try to take care of me, when you're the one who needs it and I'm the one who got us into this mess.' He reached for the crumpled sweater that had been Kakashi's pillow, shook it out, then pushed it over his head and slid his arms into the sleeves. He hesitated before pulling the material down over the bandaged torso, feeling Kakashi flinch and whimper as he did.

"I'm so sorry, Kakashi-kun."

"Don't have to be..." Kakashi painfully dragged one arm up and around Iruka's waist for a weak embrace. "Gonna be alright, Ruru-kun."

Hearing the pet name just made the lump in Iruka's throat tighten. He turned to action to master his unruly emotions. "We need to get you warmer, and I need to deal with... him..." Iruka glanced at Akumaru's body.

"Blanket in my pack," Kakashi offered.

"Mine, too. I'll use both." Iruka dug out two thin, camouflage-patterned, fleece blankets lined with heat-reflecting blackened foil. He spread one on the grass and gently half-rolled-half slid Kakashi onto it. "Are you more comfortable on your back or side?"

Kakashi didn't answer right away, lost in a world of torment. His face was contorted in an open mouthed gasp, his dark eye wide but unseeing. A tiny sound escaped his throat, a sound containing more pain in it than if it had been a full-blown scream.

"I.. Oh..." Iruka pulled the second blanket over Kakashi and cursed his helplessness. He could think of nothing to do that he hadn't already done, and time was running out. If the ANBU elixir would last at most two hours and he had to deal with Akumaru's body and somehow get Kakashi to the field station he mentioned, one Iruka didn't even know how to find...

A sharp, rattling intake of breath from Kakashi snapped Iruka's attention.

"Ruka?" he started, then coughed. When he could breathe again he continued, "Need you to... warm me for... a minute... then deal with Shida."

Iruka stared, astonished by the sudden leaps Kakashi kept making from near unconsciousness to full command.

"You're... amazing, love," Iruka said as he lay next to Kakashi, pulling his shivering body close, trying to fill him with his warmth, his life. "I can't believe you're still in control..."

"Well, I'm... ranking officer..." Kakashi mumbled, but under the circumstances it was too true for Iruka to rise to the bait of what would ordinarily have been a sly dig from his lover.

Kakashi's head pounded miserably and his vision remained blurry, further effects of Shida's poisoned blade, he guessed. The drug Iruka had given him made the pain of his injuries and the toxic nausea tolerable as long as he didn't move, but the effects of the blood loss were beyond its compensation. He was nearly unbearably cold, short of breath, and every heartbeat seemed to shake his whole body. He was so very, very tired, and he dreaded the journey that was coming. Kakashi gave up trying to stop his shivering, letting go the tension in his limbs and letting his autonomic reflexes take over. Iruka's strong arms and torso radiated warmth into him, warmth and love and courage. He closed his eye and drifted into sleep.

When he felt Kakashi's shivers subside and his body relax, his regular if raspy breathing a reassuring sound, Iruka rose. The jounin did seem more stable now, sandwiched between two thermal blankets and having absorbed the heat of his comrade's body. Still, he felt a looming dread of what the next hours would bring. Silent tears slid from his swollen eyes as he stared at the strongest of the strong rendered so very frail. He carefully repacked their knapsacks, stuffing Kakashi's bloodied sweater and mask into the bottom of his own pack, and making sure the first-aid supplies were immediately accessible at the top.

Iruka sorted through the pockets and crevices of Kakashi's pack and vest, pleased to discover a second vial of the chakra-restorative that Tsunade made up in tiny batches and delivered to those shinobi facing the most dangerous of missions. There were drawbacks to using the stuff, he had heard, but in dire emergencies it could be a lifesaver, as he had just seen.

With the bags packed, Iruka turned to gathering the fallen weapons. He picked up the poisoned kunai he had pulled from Kakashi's ribs, shuddering as he touched the deadly instrument. His lover's blood stained the blade and soaked into the silk wrappings on the hilt, but he did not dare clean the instrument, lest he wipe away the poison and any chance of formulating an antidote. Next he retrieved Kakashi's and Akumaru's katanas, re-sheathing Kakashi's, and placing them with the knapsacks. Finally he found the mantis-faced ANBU mask on the ground where Akumaru had thrown it - it was dirty and cracked near the chin - and placed it on the pile.

Satisfied that all was in readiness, Iruka turned to the unpleasant task of divesting Shida Akumaru of his clothing and the last remnants of his mortal body. He bent over the dead man, his grotesquely scarred and leering face unsoftened by the passing of life. The blood-spattered cavity through his chest and armor was a horrifying sight. Iruka had never before confronted the results of Kakashi's signature jutsu, the chidori. The hole was exactly the size and shape of Kakashi's palm; a remnant of gauze ripped from his bandaged wrist fluttered on a ragged edge of rib bone within the wound. In a single blow he had ripped the man's heart out with the chakra-filled force of his thrusting hand, an austere testament to the jounin's awesome power.

Shuddering, Iruka removed the traitor's Konoha hitai-ate and fished from his neck the chain and tags that still marked him as one of the Fire County's elite shinobi. Next he unstrapped the kunai pouch from one thick leg, then unbuckled the heavy katana sheath and reunited it with its weapon. Iruka was surprised to find the man had been using a long sword: there was no sign of the infamous wakizashi that Akumaru had used in his decade-old crime.

He wasn't sure whether to attempt to remove the rest of Akumaru's clothing, but something about the story he remembered hearing about Kakashi's escape from him ten years ago made him want to try to at least retrieve the chest armor. He studied it, looking for buckles or ties he could unfasten to facilitate removal, swallowing his disgust at the gore that spilled from the hole through its middle.

At last freeing the garment, he tossed it onto the pile of Akumaru's belongings, then turned back to the stiffening corpse. The sun was lower, casting long shadows, and a cool breeze had sprung up, tossing the evergreen branches in the trees ringing the meadow. Removing one last item, the weapons pouch around the dead man's waist, Iruka decided he was as finished as he could be. He checked on Kakashi, relieved to find him still sleeping somewhat peacefully, then turned back to his undertaker's task.

He knew he dared not leave Akumaru's corpse for any enemies of Konoha to find, especially as close to the borders of the Sound and Cloud countries as they stood, but he had no time for a proper dismemberment, nor could he bring the dead body back to Konohagakure, so burning would have to suffice. He dragged the heavy corpse into the stone-paved road and covered it with handfuls of dried grass from the meadow, then retrieved a small bottle of fire-starter and a lighter from a pocket of his vest and dumped the accelerant over Shida's remains. As he prepared to set the corpse ablaze, the ANBU tattoo on Akumaru's upper arm caught his eye, looking so much like Kakashi's, but marred by a scar that puckered and folded above it.

'You don't deserve to wear that symbol,' Iruka thought darkly. He was filled with a sudden hatred for the sick, twisted bastard that had hurt Kakashi so badly not once but twice. "You won't win, you hear me?" he raged at the dead man. "I won't let you have him!"

_End Chapter 7_

ooo ooo ooo

_Author's Notes and Thank-yous:_

The aftermath of the battle taking a lot longer to write than I had once imagined. Also, I've flared up my wrists pretty badly, but I'm writing as much as I can. Damn body won't get the best of me!

Thank you to all who are reviewing as they read, I get an enormous boost from reading your comments, encouragements and even the occasional threat, though I prefer the encouragements. Please do continue to write specific comments if you are able, as they spur me to the greatest creative heights.

Especial thanks to L-Lamb (aoshi-sama77) for providing me with unflagging support and DVDs - I've finally seen my characters in color and motion! And to HikaruxYuki for priceless review, research, and encouragement.

I hope you will continue to read, review, and enjoy my writing.

Nezuko


	9. Illegal Jutsu

**It's Nothing**

_by Nezuko, Prince of Rats_

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

Iruka knew he dared not leave Akumaru's corpse for any enemies of Konoha to find, especially as close to the borders of the Sound and Cloud countries as they stood, but he had no time for a proper dismemberment, nor could he bring the dead body back to Konohagakure, so burning would have to suffice. He dragged the heavy corpse into the stone-paved road and covered it with handfuls of dried grass from the meadow, then retrieved a small bottle of fire-starter and a lighter from a pocket of his vest and dumped the accelerant over Shida's remains. As he prepared to set the corpse ablaze, the ANBU tattoo on Akumaru's upper arm caught his eye, looking so much like Kakashi's, but marred by a scar that puckered and folded above it.

'You don't deserve to wear that symbol,' Iruka thought darkly. He was filled with a sudden hatred for the sick, twisted bastard that had hurt Kakashi so badly not once but twice. "You won't win, you hear me?" he raged at the dead man. "I won't let you have him!"

_Chapter 8: Illegal Jutsu_

As the last of the sickening smell of Shida Akumaru's funeral pyre rose on black smoke into the cool autumn sky, dissipating into the evergreens, Iruka returned to Kakashi to find him awake and staring at the smoldering remains. He knelt by the jounin's side and reached a hand under the blanket to touch his arm.

"May you go to whatever afterlife you deserve, Akumaru-san," Kakashi whispered, watching the smoke drift away.

"How... how can you pray for the soul of that bastard traitor?" Iruka's fingers clenched unconsciously around Kakashi's shoulder. He stared in disbelief at his pallid, injured lover.

"It is not my role to judge the dead." Kakashi's sigh bubbled and wheezed in his chest. "And as bad as he was... before that.." he stopped, shut his eye, and pulled in a rasping breath. "He was my comrade."

"I can't believe you _forgive_ him. I... I... look at you!" Iruka felt on the verge of breaking apart.

"I _don't_ forgive him. But..." Kakashi choked on his words and started coughing, then clutched his abdomen, writhing.

"Ai! Don't talk! Stop talking! You were doing better before!" Iruka's voice rose in alarm.

Kakashi groaned, eye closed, cold sweat trickling down his face; he felt like he was drowning in pain. 'It's too much,' he thought, 'I can't do this.'

"Kakashi?" He felt Iruka's hand on his shoulder, heard the anxious worry in the younger man's voice.

"How long... since you gave me... that stuff?" Kakashi asked through clenched teeth.

Iruka pulled a silver pocket watch out and checked it. "About 45 minutes."

"Too soon. Wore off... too soon."

"Do you want...? There's another one..." Iruka offered.

"No. Might need it... later. If things get worse." Kakashi gagged and gasped, desperate for more air, his kunai-pierced lung partly collapsed and congested with blood.

"Worse? Worse than this?" Iruka was startled. How much worse did Kakashi think it could get?

"My vest," Kakashi said, "In the leftmost scroll pouch. Slit the lining."

Iruka took a kunai from his holster and did as Kakashi asked, reaching two fingers into the slit and extracting a slip of blue and silver paper origamied into a narrow envelope.

He held it out to Kakashi. "This?"

"Open it."

Iruka carefully unfolded the paper, discovering inside three slim, iridescent needles.

"Kakashi, are these...?"

"Un. Use one. My neck."

"But these... they're illegal! It's too dangerous!"

"Iruka..." Kakashi sounded weary, "we have to go... ten kilometers. I can't take... any more pain."

Iruka stared at the jutsued senbon. Kakashi was right, he probably couldn't tolerate the journey as he was now. But this was... People had _died_ using these.

"Ruka. Listen to me." Kakashi coughed, blood spattering from his lips. "It'll keep me... going. I'm _not_... letting that bastard... win."

"OK. But not the neck. It's too risky with your breathing this bad." Iruka swallowed. "I'll go for your solar plexus - that'll still cover the worst injury."

Kakashi closed his eye and nodded in silent assent. Iruka was probably right to avoid the neck and chest, even if it meant the poisoned kunai wound would get little relief. He could feel the toxic substance still flowing through his body, changing its method of attack as it worked its way through his nervous system. The nausea was finally receding, replaced by a crawling tightness in every muscle, and his vision was blurred and painful. 'It feels like I've got nails through my eye sockets,' he thought, 'What the hell was on that blade?'

Iruka folded the blanket down to Kakashi's hips and eased the hem of his sweater up, exposing a blood-smeared and bandaged abdomen. "You're sure about this?" he asked, holding one of the tiny senbon poised over Kakashi's belly.

"Yeah. Go in at about a... forty-degree angle... toward my heart."

"I... what if I...? Iruka couldn't finish. 'What if I divert too much chakra? What if I miss the critical spot? What if I go too far?'

"You can do this, Ruka. I trust you."

'But I don't trust myself,' Iruka thought. His hand shook a little as he angled the needle, visualizing the chakra pathways he was trying to hit, the nerves he wanted to control, the vital organs he had to thread the dangerous thing between. He placed his free hand on Kakashi's upper abdomen, searching for the anatomical landmarks, feeling tensely strained muscles twitch beneath his fingers.

At the touch of Iruka's palm, a pained grunt escaped Kakashi's lips before he could stop it. 'Tough it out, Hatake,' he gritted to himself. He didn't want to spook Iruka. Using the contraband senbon was their best chance at making it to the field station, despite the risks, and in the state he was in he didn't think he could place it himself. "Please, Ru-kun..." he groaned. The chill breeze blowing across his uncovered body made him shiver.

Iruka swallowed, said a silent prayer to the gods of healing, and plunged the senbon into Kakashi's flesh between the base of his sternum and his navel. Kakashi gasped and went rigid as the oily-colored needle seemed to take on a life of its own, driving itself deeper and deeper until it disappeared below the surface of his skin.

"Kakashi!" Iruka screamed his lover's name, eyes wide with fear.

"D... dai... daijoubu. It's... OK," Kakashi rasped, feeling the jutsu coursing through his body. The desperate agony of the sword wound began to ice over, growing remote, and an alien energy flowed through his chakra meridians. He sucked in a shaky breath and opened his eye, reaching his hand for Iruka's, which was frozen tensely on his abdomen.

"It's working. It's supposed to do that." Kakashi squeezed the chuunin's fingers.

"Oh gods, Kakashi." Iruka shuddered. He couldn't even begin to articulate the horror he had experienced feeling the chakra come alive under his fingers, the flare of Kakashi's life force spiraling _out_ along the needle before the device had been sucked and sealed inside. "I could have killed you!"

"Yeah... That's why they're illegal." Kakashi coughed, but this time the jarring torment the action sent through his body dissipated and deadened below the point at which the needle had entered, more like the memory of pain than pain itself. Even the kunai wound in his chest felt less dire, less acute, despite the fact that it was above the point of the jutsu's action.

"It'll be OK now, Ruka-kun... Should buy us a few hours."

"You're... you're OK?"

"I'm OK. It's helping a lot." Kakashi smiled with only a little less than his usual sparkle. 'It's only half a lie,' he thought, 'With half the pain countered, and the chakra crutch, I can recover some of my own strength.'

Iruka smiled back weakly and stroked his lover's sweaty hair. "How long will it work, really?"

"Eh, should have maybe..."

Iruka could see Kakashi calculating, crafting an answer.

"Don't reassure me, Kakashi. Tell me the truth."

The jounin looked surprised. "Am I that transparent?"

Iruka just squeezed his hand.

"Ano... I don't know how the poison's... gonna affect it..." Kakashi paused for breath, chest heaving. "Two, three hours?"

Iruka nodded. 'Two hours, then,' he told himself. 'Even if he's telling me the truth, I know he's being optimistic.'

"You think you'll be OK to go in a few minutes, Kashi?"

"Un... yeah."

"I'll carry you on my back. Put your vest on you - should keep you warmer," Iruka planned aloud. "Maybe the blankets, too. Can I put your backpack on you?"

"Yeah. And my weapons."

"OK, I'll carry the... other ones." Iruka glanced at the pile of Akumaru's belongings with distaste.

"Ruka... you're good at this..." Kakashi wheezed, "Should teach a... field-aid unit."

'Damn, his breathing sounds worse,' Iruka thought. He looked closely at the jounin, who was panting open-mouthed.

"How's your chest?"

"I'll live."

"You're having trouble breathing. I can hear it."

"I _was_ stabbed."

"Dammit, Kakashi! Take this seriously! Don't give me your flip non-answers! I need to know how you are!" Iruka glared at his lover, fire burning in his smokey brown eyes.

'Oh shit, I made him mad,' Kakashi thought.

"I'm sorry, Ru-chan... I'm alright... Hurts, but... it really _is_ better."

"And your breathing?"

"'S'a little... difficult... " Kakashi gave a small, wet cough.

"You said ten kilometers, right?"

"About that."

"OK, tell me how to get there, but don't talk too much. Save your breath."

Kakashi nodded. "It's north-northwest... hidden trail... from that bunker..." he broke off coughing hard, bloody foam rising in his windpipe. Once again the senbon's jutsu deadened the pain of the cough before it could spread to his slashed abdomen. He was dimly aware of the fact that it _should_ have hurt more, but the effort to breathe took most of his attention.

Iruka tensed, expecting the cough's jarring motion to send Kakashi into agony. When it didn't, he felt a moment's relief, but the jounin's greying features revived his alarm. "Kakashi! Breathe! Can you breathe?" He grabbed the struggling man's shoulders and rolled him onto his side.

"I'm... trying..." Kakashi gagged, then expelled a mass of clotted blood and frothy slime. Airway clearer, he lay gasping, the cyanotic tinge slowly fading from his lips.

Iruka's heart was beating almost as wildly as Kakashi's. 'What can I do? There's gotta be something I can do!' He stared at the heaving, bandaged ribs of his comrade and saw that the crimson stain was spreading and deepening. Tearing open his knapsack, he yanked out the medical kit and frantically searched it, extracting a slim paper pouch and a new roll of gauze.

"'M... OK... Ru..." Kakashi panted, his eye glazed.

"Be quiet! You're _not_ OK, you're bleeding into your chest, dammit!" Iruka's hands shook as he peeled back Kakashi's bandage, freeing a red fountain to spray into the air and stream down his side. The chuunin gasped, then slammed the fresh clot-forming sponge over the source of the blood, holding it down tightly with both hands and sending his own chakra pouring into the breach.

Kakashi hissed sharply as Iruka mercilessly compressed the stab wound between his broken ribs. The electric jolt of the chuunin's raw chakra spread through his side and deep into his chest. From somewhere far below the surface of his blunted consciousness, Kakashi took charge of his lover's chakra, forming it into a healing jutsu for internal bleeding, one he had learned from Rin many, many years ago. He heard her voice softly instructing, "Shape it into a cone, then drive it into the center of the wound."

Iruka was startled to feel the power he was directing begin to change shape. 'My god, he's able to mold _my_ chakra?' His first instinct was to wrest control away from the jounin, but he forced himself to maintain the current of energy. Almost imperceptibly at first, but soon quite noticeably, the blood flow slowed to a trickling ooze, which the jutsued bandage was more than able to contain.

When he was sure the bleeding had all but stopped, Iruka pulled his hands away and let out the trembling breath he hadn't realized he had been holding. He leaned forward, hands on his knees, drained and puffing as if he had just run a race. He was startled when he felt Kakashi's hand caress his cheek.

"Ruka? You alright?"

"Me? Oh gods, Kakashi! You're..." Iruka was at a loss for words. He grabbed Kakashi's hand in his right and clung tightly, stroking the jounin's hair with his left.

"I'm OK, Iruka. I'm here," Kakashi soothed, "Catch your breath a minute. That was a lot of chakra."

Iruka's racing heart slowly settled back to its normal rhythm as he continued to pet Kakashi's head, saying nothing.

'That was something else, Iruka-kun,' Kakashi thought, watching his lover recover from the effort. He was drained as well, but could feel a difference in his body with the bleeding stopped, though his chest ached and his breathing remained ragged. The toxic headache and nerve pain had become a background noise. The jutsued senbon continued to radiate its strange energy through his chakra paths, countering pain, poison and exhaustion, blocking sensation from the gaping slash across his gut.

"Two hours, Ruka-kun," Kakashi said at length, feeling the air cool and the shadows deepen, "Can you do it?"

"Two hours. Ten kilometers. Yeah, I can do it."

"OK, we should go, if you're ready."

"You're sure you can handle it?" The chuunin stared searchingly at Kakashi.

"I'll have to," Kakashi replied soberly.

When Iruka had loaded up and was preparing to move Kakashi at last, the jounin stopped him. "The mask. Give me Shida's mask."

"What?"

"Put it... on my belt."

Iruka helped his comrade to a kneeling position, then solemnly hung the mask from Kakashi's waist, where the insect face leered a final tribute to it's fallen owner. He squatted in front of Kakashi, who leaned against his back and placed his arms around Iruka's neck. Reaching behind him, Iruka placed a hand under each of Kakashi's thighs, then rose to his feet with a lurch.

"North-northwest?"

"North-northwest. Look for the leaf markers."

"Hai. Hold on."

Settling Kakashi's weight over his hips, Iruka set off in the direction of the field unit.

_End Chapter 8_

ooo ooo ooo

Japanese words:

_daijoubu_ - it's alright. Can also be a question - are you alright?

_enbon_ - needle that can be used as a weapon or a healing instrument, depending on size and how it is placed

Author's Notes and Thank-yous:

I guess I _am_ a suspense writer - I got so caught up while writing parts of this chapter that I was unconsciously holding my breath. My neck and shoulders ached, and not from typing, from anxiety.

Please forgive me if I don't answer all my reviews individually - I'd like to acknowledge each of you who are helping to make this such an immense pleasure for me. I'm overwhelmed with gratitude and delight. Please do continue to write specific comments if you are able, as they spur me to the greatest creative heights. If you'd like to hear back from me, drop me an email (available on my profile page.)

I've posted a couple of illustrations for this story, including one for the milk-tea scene, on my DA site: nezuko dot deviantart dot com

I don't intend to do this every time, but I want to answer a question that came up in reviews for the previous chapter: "Why didn't Iruka just cut Kakashi's sweater off of him, and why did he bother to save it?"

I actually considered these very questions while I was writing that chapter; this is how I conceived it: Iruka is under tremendous pressure here. Despite this, he is making generally excellent decisions, but he's not perfect. It probably would have been easier to cut the sweater off, but it just didn't occur to him to do so. As to why save the sweater - that's a strongly emotion-based and unthinking action. This is the bloodied uniform of the man he loves, a man who may not live to see the next sunrise. Keeping the soiled clothing is an unconscious attempt to keep Kakashi himself.

Thank you again for the wonderful, detailed, supportive reviews. I hope you will continue to read, review, and enjoy my writing.

Nezuko


	10. Trail of Pain

**It's Nothing**

_by Nezuko, Prince of Rats_

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

"Two hours, Ruka-kun," Kakashi said at length, feeling the air cool and the shadows deepen, "Can you do it?"

"Two hours. Ten kilometers. Yeah, I can do it."

"OK, we should go, if you're ready."

"You're sure you can handle it?" The chuunin stared searchingly at Kakashi.

"I'll have to," Kakashi replied soberly.

When Iruka had loaded up and was preparing to move Kakashi at last, the jounin stopped him. "The mask. Give me Shida's mask."

"What?"

"Put it... on my belt."

Iruka helped his comrade to a kneeling position, then solemnly hung the mask from Kakashi's waist, where the insect face leered a final tribute to it's fallen owner. He squatted in front of Kakashi, who leaned against his back and placed his arms around Iruka's neck. Reaching behind him, Iruka placed a hand under each of Kakashi's thighs, then rose to his feet with a lurch.

"North-northwest?"

"North-northwest. Look for the leaf markers."

"Hai. Hold on."

Settling Kakashi's weight over his hips, Iruka set off in the direction of the field unit.

ooo ooo ooo

_Chapter 9: Trail of Pain_

Iruka hiked the mountain terrain as steadily and carefully as he could. He was heavily laden, carrying his knapsack and Shida's weapons on his front and side, and bearing Kakashi, who wore his own backpack and katana, on his back. Kakashi and he were nearly the same size, though the jounin was a couple of centimeters taller; with equipment and weapons, Iruka was carrying close to one and a half times his weight as he labored up the difficult path.

The terrain was rough and the path not well marked. This latter was deliberate, since the leaf shinobi who had made the trail some thirty-odd years ago or longer had wanted it to be discernible only to others of their kind, and it had been little-used of late. Still, the signs were there for one such as Iruka, who knew how to see.

"Look for flat stones with leaf sigils..." Kakashi had instructed as they entered the dense trees at the edge of the clearing. "Also residual chakra flags."

"I can't see chakra the way you can, Kashi," Iruka replied. "But I can pick out the trail, I think. I see one of the markers up there under the roots of that pine."

"Yeah..." Kakashi coughed wetly, and Iruka felt his body tense.

"Don't talk unless you see me wandering off the path, OK? I'll get us there."

Kakashi nodded his head against Iruka's neck in acknowledgment. He focused on keeping his weight as centered as possible, trying to minimize any sway that would off-balance Iruka or jar his own damaged body. The _mayaku no senbon _he'd had Iruka place continued to exert its strange effect. Its jutsu was subtle and complex, rerouting chakra away from the damaged pathways below it's major nexus of entry, and supplementing the jounin's depleted lifeforce with an alien and obviously false, but nonetheless necessary energy. Its greatest benefit, by far, was benumbing the pain of the 25 centimeter gash that opened his abdomen from navel to right hip above the groin.

The poison from Shida's blade, however, continued it's nefarious assault on Kakashi's nervous system. His vision was blurred almost to the point that he wanted to lift his hitai-ate and use his Sharingan despite the drain on chakra the red eye would demand. And while the previously incapacitating nausea and blinding headache had receded, new and more worrisome symptoms were manifesting. Kakashi's nerves and muscles thrummed with a quivering, subdued violence that threatened to erupt into twitching spasms. His hands, feet, lips and tongue were growing numb, and maintaining his grip was becoming an effort.

If only the damn numbness could extend to his pierced side, he thought, the entry point for the poison, but that wound burned like a fiery brand. Deep breaths were impossible - even his panting, shallow ones hurt - and despite the internal bleeding jutsu he and Iruka had woven together, Kakashi's stabbed left lung was soggy and inflamed, no longer doing its job of extracting oxygen from the air.

The continuous physical contact of carrying Kakashi on his back let Iruka feel keenly the chakra flares in his partner's body. Every jolt or sway caused a little flood of the strange mingled chakra - Kakashi's familiar energy mixed with the senbon's alien one - to burst forth briefly, letting Iruka know that while the jutsu might be masking the pain from the injured shinobi's conscious perception, it was still taking its toll on his body.

After an hour of steady progress, Iruka paused to wipe his sweating brow and take his bearings. That, and he wanted to see Kakashi's face, verify that he was holding up. That the bleeding had not resumed. That he was not suffering too much.

"I think we should rest a minute," he said, dropping to his knees. "Can you get down OK?"

"Yeah." Kakashi tried to get his feet under him, to ease off Iruka's back, but his legs refused to obey him, and instead of sliding into a controlled crouch, he lurched awkwardly backwards, falling with a grunted cry.

"Kashi!" Iruka spun around, "Are you OK?"

"Aunh," came Kakashi's inarticulate reply. He didn't even try to right himself from the twisted heap he had collapsed into, but lay tight-faced and shivering, trying to master the pain the fall had reawakened in his body.

Iruka dropped his pack and quickly gathered Kakashi into his arms, sitting behind him and carefully easing the jounin into what he hoped was a more comfortable position. He was dismayed to find his lover's exposed skin was ice cold, though his face was sheened with sweat. His complexion was ghastly, greenish white, making the bruised cheek and old scars stand out lividly; his lips were parted and bloodstained.

"How are you holding out? Is that... the senbon... is it still working?" Iruka looked searchingly into Kakashi's face, pushing sweaty silver locks off his too-cold forehead.

"I'm OK." Kakashi struggled to push himself upright against Iruka's chest, then leaned back into the warmth of his love's arms and shut his eye, letting his head fall back against the chuunin's shoulder. In another context it would have been a sweet embrace.

Iruka let him rest like that a moment, glad when he felt the shivering subside. He gently lifted the edge of the heavy uniform sweater and scanned Kakashi's body, relieved that the bloodstains on the bandages did not seem any larger.

"You know what we... called this path, Ruka?" Kakashi asked at length.

"Mmm?"

"The Trail of Pain."

"What? Why?"

"This was the retreat path... to the medics..." Kakashi broke off, coughing, arms hugged tightly against his side and belly.

"Hush, don't talk so much," Iruka scolded, wrapping his own arms around Kakashi's.

"That fucker, Akumaru, he knew it," the jounin continued, ignoring Iruka's admonishment. "Knew I was there... here... before... when they..." His words diminished almost to a whisper before he stopped, leaving his sentence unfinished.

Iruka was riveted by the choked tension in his friend's voice, a tension that had nothing to do with his physical injuries. The last battles in this area would have been when Kakashi was in his teens, already a jounin commander. Of course he had fought in the Cloud Wars, he realized, of course he had been here. But did he mean - was this the location of the infamous Mountain Pass Massacre? Had Kakashi been part of that horror?

Iruka pulled the silver-haired man closer, wanting to protect his beloved from his painful memories as much as from his current wounds. "Kashi... Ka-chan... are you... were you...?"

"Thirsty," Kakashi cut in gruffly. He was _not_ going to think about the slaughter he had witnessed here 17 years ago. He would _not_ let Shida sap his will to live from the grave like a soul-eating zombie.

"I, uh, ordinarily with a belly wound I'd say no water," Iruka said, "but I think maybe you should have some anyway, because of the bleeding." Iruka opened a canteen and took a drink himself before holding it in front of Kakashi.

The jounin looked up at his companion with a dull, hooded eye, then lifted an arm, reaching for the bottle. He felt it hit his palm, but when he tried to wrap his fingers around it, they clenched claw-like, his whole arm quivering with spasms, and the canteen dropped to the ground.

"Damn!" Kakashi's voice was thick sounding and slurred.

"Here, I'll help." Iruka retrieved the dropped canister, wiped it's neck and held it to the jounin's mouth, tipping a trickle of water between the parted lips.

Kakashi swallowed a mouthful, then pushed the bottle and Iruka's hand away. His head spun dizzily, and his pounding heart felt like it was shaking his whole frame. His body struggled to supply his cells with the oxygen and glucose they desperately needed, but his blood volume was depleted and his lung capacity halved. It was going to be a losing battle unless he did something.

"Iruka, in my med kit..." He stopped to rest, mid-sentence.

"What? What about your kit?" Iruka was alarmed.

_"Kinketsueki - _blood chakra pills." Kakashi's numb tongue blundered through the words.

"You have those? Thank heavens! Why didn't you say something sooner?" Iruka immediately began to rummage in Kakashi's knapsack, which was still on the jounin's shoulders. He pulled out a small zippered case and opened it, revealing bandages, packets, and a row of vials containing various pills and powders. "I didn't think anyone but medics had access to those."

"They don't, usually."

"And you do because..." Iruka stopped himself. "I shouldn't ask."

"Tell you later, 'K Ruru?" Kakashi's eye had closed again.

"Which ones? These?" Iruka held one of the bottles in front of Kakashi's face, but got no response. He shook the jounin. "Don't sleep, Kakashi. Stay awake! Which ones?"

Kakashi forced himself to focus, drawing on the senbon's strange energy, and willed his eye open, his head up. "Yeah, those." He reached for the vial, but again his hand clawed and shook.

"I'll do it." Iruka opened the bottle and shook the tablets into his hands. "There are three here. How many?"

"One now, one in a few hours," Kakashi answered, his words slurred.

"You need a lot of water with these, don't you?"

"Best to. I'll try."

Iruka slipped the pill into Kakashi's mouth, then brought the canteen to his lips.

It dissolved almost at once, the bitter metallic flavor of the tablet coating Kakashi's tongue and throat, and he had to struggle to keep from retching. He swallowed hard, gulping down as much water as he could tolerate.

When he sensed Kakashi had stopped drinking, Iruka pulled the bottle away. "How are you? Is it... Are you OK?"

"OK," Kakashi agreed. He lay back against Iruka's warm body again, his head pillowed on the chuunin's puffy vest.

The pill was another patch. It wouldn't replace the lost blood, but it would help what remained to function better. The water was necessary to try to make up for the volume depletion. Kakashi's insides burned as the substance migrated through his mucous membranes and stomach lining and into his bloodstream.

"More water?" Iruka held the canteen out again.

"Aaa." Kakashi reached out a shaking hand.

"Quit it! Just let me hold it. Don't waste your energy like that."

Kakashi grunted and dropped his hand into his lap. It continued to shake there, his fingers twitching.

"It's the poison that's doing that, isn't it?" Iruka asked quietly, when the jounin had finished drinking.

"Yeah."

"Do you know what it is? Do you have any idea? Any antidote?"

"Could be a lot of things," Kakashi answered slowly. 'None of them good,' he added to himself. He could tell it was a nerve agent of some sort - Iruka probably could too. One designed to torment its victim. But the nerve toxins he knew of all demanded different treatments, and it was still too soon to tell what this one was, beyond relatively slow acting. 'I've got a few good tricks in my med kit,' he thought, 'but nothing that will neutralize this sort of thing. No point in alarming Ruka, though. If I'm lucky, I didn't get enough of a dose to kill me.'

"You're sitting there thinking you don't want to tell me how bad this really is." Iruka's words stunned Kakashi.

"It's a torture agent, isn't it? And it's gonna get worse."

Kakashi didn't answer.

"Isn't it?" Iruka persisted. "Your not denying it is as good as a confirmation. This slow acting, it's gotta be designed for torture."

"Aaa. It's some kind of... slow nerve toxin. Yeah."

"That bastard. That fucking bastard!" Iruka's voice choked with rage. "I'm so sorry, Kashi..."

"It's OK. Not that bad." Kakashi reached a trembling hand up to his lover's face, brushing his tingling and unresponsive fingers along the chuunin's clenched jaw. "Shhh, Ruru. It's OK."

Iruka took a long, slow breath, his sigh ruffling Kakashi's hair. "I... I'm sorry. I just... He followed me! You're hurt because..."

"No, I'm not! Not your fault." Kakashi cut him off. He tried to think of some way to distract Iruka. "How much do you... know about torture agents?" He paused for air, coughing and wincing at the motion. "Ibiki teach you?"

"Ano - how did you know?" Iruka looked surprised. "Did he tell you?"

"Anyone wants to know... about torture poisons... Ibiki's the one to ask." Kakashi forced a small laugh, grimacing.

"Don't laugh, I can see it hurts you. Here, drink a little more." Iruka held the bottle to Kakashi's lips again, angling it so Kakashi could control the trickle of water as it flowed into his mouth, then continued, "I took a field medic course a few years ago. Ibiki-san covered the section on the effects of torture. He mentioned several toxins that could be used to..." Iruka paused, mouth going dry, "maximize suffering... before they kill..." He shuddered and his hand holding the canteen shook, sloshing water down Kakashi's chin.

"Sorry, I'm sorry..." Iruka wiped the spilled water from his lover's face.

'Great,' Kakashi groaned to himself, 'I was trying to get him to think of something other than death.'

"Gotta... keep going, Ruka," he tried another tactic, "You following the trail OK?"

Iruka looked up, forcing himself to focus on the present, on the task at hand. "Yeah, it ah... it looks like we head down into this valley, then back up the other side into that next stand of woods."

Both men regarded the rock-strewn, steep, grassy hillsides between the patch of forest they were leaving and the next one they were heading for. The previously warming sunlight was now obscured by mountain shadows, and a chill wind blew heavy moisture over the crests of the tallest peaks, sending ominous black clouds roiling over the edges like a rice pot left too long on the stove.

"On the other side," Kakashi said, voice still ragged and slightly slurred "the trail's a little easier. Less steep." He paused for breath, then continued, "The med station's sealed. You know _Akehirogeru?"_

"The open-hidden jutsu? Yeah. It's a little unusual, isn't it?"

"We're still not in... Fire Country's borders."

"Oh." That was sobering news.

"When you unseal it... should alert a healer-nin to come." Kakashi continued, wheezing. "You know the forms?"

"They're old, but yeah, I know them. Don't worry. I teach this stuff, remember?"

Yeah. Sorry."

"Healer-nin will have an antidote, right?"

"Yeah. It's gonna be alright." Kakashi grabbed Iruka's warm hand in his icy one and squeezed. "Think we can go on?"

"I uh, before we get back on the trail, I've gotta piss. You don't need to?" Iruka asked, scratching his nose and looking just slightly embarrassed.

"No. Too much blood-loss," Kakashi replied. "You go ahead. I'll watch." He tried to grin, but on his pallid face the lechery looked ghoulish.

"You really are unregenerate, you know?" Iruka kissed the top of Kakashi's head, before easing him to the ground and getting to his feet. "You, you better... just hang in there, OK?"

"Mm, I will."

ooo

Getting back onto Iruka's back to resume their journey was difficult. The _kinketsueki_ pill was working its magic, making Kakashi's struggle for oxygen less acute, keeping his blood pressure from falling too low. But despite the medicines and jutsus, the jounin was weakening, and there was a certain amount of pain beyond the spells' reach. Kakashi made a masterful effort at hiding his distress from Iruka, though given how extreme his injuries were, it was a vain attempt. While they had rested, the poison had continued to erode his muscular control, so that holding himself upright in a squat was impossible. He braced himself against a tree, but Iruka had to do most of the work to lift the ailing jounin, and the painful wrench tore a curse from Kakashi's lips before he could stop it.

At first it seemed that it was just the change in positions that was hard on Kakashi, that once settled on Iruka's back, he was stable. But after another 45 minutes of travel, Iruka was really beginning to worry. The trail seemed unending, the sun was setting, and the air was chill and damp. Kakashi was now shivering frequently, and responding only in grunted monosyllables. Struggling up a steep and uneven slope in the gloomy forest shade, Iruka himself was beginning to tire. He put a foot wrong, stumbling slightly over an exposed tree root, and though he recovered his balance, the resulting lurch jerked the man on his back, who quickly stifled a moan, then coughed, choking and wet, and groaned again.

Iruka stopped, alarmed to feel a warm, wet trickle against the back of his neck.

"Kakashi, are you OK?"

"Unh... Keep... going."

He could feel it wear away, the precious support the jutsued senbon had lent. The tiny needle wasn't metal, but some substance that dissolved in the body as it was used. Its two hours were up, and the spell was almost gone. The poison was now making his larger muscles twitch and quiver uncontrollably, and moment by moment the pain in his side and abdomen was growing to engulf him. Kakashi bit his lip, letting his head loll against Iruka's neck. He just had to hang on a little longer, he told himself. He recognized the landscape, even in the dusk through hazy eyes. It couldn't be too much further.

What he didn't know - what neither of them did - was that the _mayaku no senbon, _ while it indeed probably saved Kakashi's life, was also interfering with his body's clotting mechanism. The blocked and chaotic chakra engendered by the sword wound swirled above his solar plexus, entering his damaged lung and breaking away the fragile repairs the cells had begun to make. It couldn't completely undo the healing - the jutsu for internal bleeding Kakashi had learned from Rin and performed on himself using Iruka's raw chakra was too strong for that - but the edges of the healed areas were breaking down, beginning to bleed again, filling the spongy tissue of his lung with liquid crimson.

Iruka could hear the gurgle in Kakashi's breath, and felt him sag as the injured man drifted in and out of consciousness. When they had set out, Kakashi had said it was about ten kilometers to the medical refuge, but between the steep terrain, the physical effort of carrying his companion, and the strain of frantic worry the chuunin labored under, it seemed twice that distance. He was on the point of stopping and asking Kakashi if they were still on the right path, when a shimmering disturbance in the air caught his attention. The woods around them were fragrant with the oil of the cryptomeria trees towering over them, and a hazy mist filtered through their branches, but there was something else there.

"You said it was camoflaged, right?" Iruka asked.

Kakashi heard him as if from far away. He was cold. So cold. He leaned into the warmth radiating from his bearer's back, trying to wake up enough to make sense of Iruka's question.

"Is it genjutsu?" Iruka went on, "Should I try to break it?"

'Kai,' Kakashi thought, wanting to tell Iruka to use the illusion dispersing jutsu, but the word didn't make it to his mouth.

Even had he heard his instruction, Iruka couldn't form the seal without letting go of Kakashi's legs. He considered it, but didn't want to release his hold until he was sure the jounin was conscious. He peered into the gloom, desperately trying to see.

Kakashi pulled himself awake, remembering dimly another way to break the spell. He tried to take a deep breath, shuddered and coughed, blood rising thickly in his windpipe. He turned his head, summoned incredible will to lean away from Iruka, and let the hot, slimy liquid drip from his mouth onto the ground.

To Iruka's surprised eyes, the trees abruptly thinned, revealing a dark clearing with a decrepit-looking wooden structure at its center. Because they were in the penumbra of the Konoha field station, Kakashi's blood touching the soil had deactivated the illusion. An emergency measure left in place for situations just such as this - a Leaf-nin, too injured to break the illusion with chakra, need only bleed upon the ground to reveal the presence of the sanctuary.

_End Chapter 9_

ooo ooo ooo

Japanese words:

_mayaku no senbon - _narcotic or illegal drug senbon

Author's Note:

Another chapter full of pathos and suffering. I hope you will all leave me at least a quick review - I love to hear what you think.

Thanks to all who have reviewed so far. Your encouragement and feedback are priceless to me.

Extra special thanks to:

L-lamb and Hey-Diddle-Diddle for early reads and feedback.

Hey-Diddle-Diddle for the name of the _mayaku no senbon._

Carcinya, HikaruxYuki, and RadicalEdward for late night encouragement and conversation.


	11. Sanctuary

**It's Nothing**

_by Nezuko, Prince of Rats_

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

"You said it was camouflaged, right?" Iruka asked.

Kakashi heard him as if from far away. He was cold. So cold. He leaned into the warmth radiating from his bearer's back, trying to wake up enough to make sense of Iruka's question.

"Is it genjutsu?" Iruka went on, "Should I try to break it?"

'Kai,' Kakashi thought, wanting to tell Iruka to use the illusion dispersing jutsu, but the word didn't make it to his mouth.

Even had he heard his instruction, Iruka couldn't form the seal without letting go of Kakashi's legs. He considered it, but didn't want to release his hold until he was sure the jounin was conscious. He peered into the gloom, desperately trying to see.

Kakashi pulled himself awake, remembering dimly another way to break the spell. He tried to take a deep breath, shuddered and coughed, blood rising thickly in his windpipe. He turned his head, summoned incredible will to lean away from Iruka, and let the hot, slimy liquid drip from his mouth onto the ground.

To Iruka's surprised eyes, the trees abruptly thinned, revealing a dark clearing with a decrepit-looking wooden structure at its center. Because they were in the penumbra of the Konoha field station, Kakashi's blood touching the soil had deactivated the illusion. An emergency measure left in place for situations just such as this - a Leaf-nin, too injured to break the illusion with chakra, need only bleed upon the ground to reveal the presence of the sanctuary.

ooo ooo ooo

_Chapter 10: Sanctuary_

Iruka moved hesitantly towards the decayed-looking hut, not trusting his eyes until he saw the stones etched with Konoha's leaf spiral and the character "pain" standing on either side of the building's front steps.

"This is it, right?" he asked Kakashi.

"Unh," was all the injured jounin could manage in response. At least he was still responding.

"OK, we're almost there then, just hang on a little more." Iruka mentally rehearsed the _Akehirogeru _jutsu, deciding that he could probably manage a one-handed version that would allow him to keep a better grip on Kakashi. "Can I let go of one of your legs for a minute? I need to make the unlocking seal."

"Unh." Kakashi tried to tighten his hold on Iruka's back, but when the supporting hand left his thigh, his leg fell heavily. A horror of pain tore through his abdomen at the movement, and only the barest thread of control kept him from screaming.

Iruka felt it immediately - the violent surge in Kakashi's chakra as he struggled to overmaster the agony of his dangling leg straining abdominal muscles, pulling the edges of the belly wound apart.

"Oh gods, I'm hurting you!" He hunched forward, stooping to keep Kakashi's weight centered over his own, as he hurriedly formed the one-handed sequence of seals to allow them admittance to the old building.

Kakashi wanted to respond, but he couldn't, his world was spiraling tighter and tighter, smaller and smaller. It was all he could do to stay conscious against the rising tide of pain. The _mayaku no senbon_ was thoroughly depleted, leaving his nerves once again free to send their desperate signals from the horrific sword wound bisecting his abdomen. The nerves themselves were keyed up to unnatural sensitivity from the neurotoxin in the poisoned kunai wound between his broken ribs, and every muscle hummed with tension from the twitching fibers. He tried to focus on simply breathing, but even that was fraught with difficulty and pain. The injured man groaned, then gave a wet, strangled sounding cough; bloody froth spattered against the back of his helper's neck.

'He's losing it,' Iruka thought frenziedly. 'I've got to get him inside.' As he completed the last step to the unlocking jutsu, the door of the hut swung open. The chuunin quickly reached around to take hold of the leg he had dropped, doing his best not to jar the panting ninja on his back. But moving the leg again was one stimulus too many, the final push that sent Kakashi over the edge, starting a chain reaction in his body that both shinobi were helpless to halt.

The jounin arched backwards, limbs thrashing and trunk muscles clenching in agonizing spasms, twisting away from Iruka. It was as if his own body were throwing him from the chuunin's back. The pain was unbearable; Kakashi's conscious control utterly destroyed. A raw, ragged howl rose from his throat, a sound that seemed to come from the very pit of Hell. From the eaves of the building a startled pair of bats rose on fluttering wings into the night sky. Iruka whirled around in a vain attempt to catch him before he struck the ground, while with the infinite mercy of the central nervous system, Kakashi blacked out.

"Kashi! Kakashi!" Iruka was frantic. His love lay insensate and convulsing on his back, his knapsack under him arching Kakashi's body further than the spasms. The sheathed katana strapped to his left hip jutted up at a crazy angle, his flailing body making an unintended club of the weapon. As he writhed, Kakashi's sweater rode up, revealing a growing blot of fresh blood on his bandaged abdomen.

'Shit! _Shit!_ A seizure! He's bleeding again! He can't breathe! Gods help me, _please!'_ Iruka watched with a growing sense of panicked powerlessness as Kakashi's face took on an ashen color, the over-arched tension of his trunk stopping his breath. Trying to free him from the entangling equipment, Iruka grabbed Kakashi's twitching shoulders, using a kunai to slice through the straps of his backpack. He yanked it from under the convulsing man, reaching next for the sword's fittings, but before he could loose it, the heavy katana banged savagely into Kakashi's injured ribs, then clouted Iruka across the temple.

The dark-haired man fell backwards, momentarily stunned by the sharp blow to the head. When his vision cleared, he found Kakashi crumpled bleeding and limp, the seizure passed. Iruka moved forward automatically, pressing both palms over the blood-soaked bandage on his lover's belly. He could feel the flutter of Kakashi's weak life force struggling to seal the breach, and added his own power to the effort. From Kakashi's left hip, the mantis-faced ANBU mask that had once belonged to Shida Akumaru leered mockingly up at the chuunin.

Iruka's hands had grown numb, his mind blank, when a muted groan from the jounin brought him back to the present.

"Aunh... Ru... ru..."

"Kakashi?" Iruka sat back blearily, rubbing at the knot on the side of his head.

"You OK? Where...?" Kakashi coughed weakly, scrunching his face up, and his shoulders twitched threateningly but his body remained tensely still.

"We're... at the..." Iruka looked around, why was it so hard to think clearly?

"Leaf Aid... Station," Kakashi finished for him.

"Yeah," Iruka agreed. He gazed at the rapidly darkening clearing, at the ramshackle looking hut. If this was an aid station, shouldn't there be medics here?

"Ruka? You OK?" Kakashi coughed again, and sucked in a few rasping breaths. "Your head..."

Iruka rubbed at his temple, wiping a smear of blood away when he did. He'd... how had he hit his head? He looked around a bit more keenly, searching for any sign of an enemy presence. When his eyes lit on the mask and sword at Kakashi's side, it all came rushing back.

"Yeah. I'm OK. It's nothing. Need to get you inside." Iruka's brain was clicking again. Get Kakashi inside. Get help. Get an antidote before the poison could do further damage. The jounin had shut his eye and lay unmoving in the awkward position the seizure had left him in. Iruka squatted on his heels and leaned forward to pick him up, dreading what the motion was going to do to the injured man. He slipped an arm under Kakashi's shoulders, the other under his thighs, and lifted the silver-haired man into his lap, surprised when Kakashi responded not at all.

"Kakashi?" He had expected a groan, a shudder, at least a tightening of the jounin's muscles at being picked up. The lack of response was more alarming than a scream of pain would have been.

"Kashi? Come on! Stay with me!"

Slowly, as if from deep below the surface of a frozen lake, Kakashi answered. "Ru..."

It wasn't much, but it was enough. Iruka let out the breath he had been holding and lurched to his feet, lifting the stricken man in his arms.

That brought the scream.

Kakashi tried to stop the wretched sound before it tore loose from his raw throat. Then, almost as quickly, blood rose to follow it, choking him. He turned his head, coughing and gasping, as Iruka ran blindly up the stairs and into the little hut.

Scanning the gloomy room, Iruka spied futons on the floor, and gingerly laid Kakashi onto the pallet closest to the wall - the most defensible position - turning him on his side so he could clear the choking fluid from his lungs and throat.

When his breathing returned to the wheeze that now passed for normal, Kakashi groaned and opened his eye, looking up at Iruka. The chuunin was wiping his lips with a cloth he had procured from somewhere, a look of numb shock on his face.

"S-s-s-sorry, Ru." Kakashi breathed. His teeth had begun to chatter, and his arms and legs were shaking from their connection points at shoulders and hips.

"Are you cold? I'll get a blanket." Iruka's head whipped around. There were a couple of stained futons on the floor, a freestanding sink, some glass-fronted cabinets built into the walls. There wasn't even a proper bed. It was a sorry excuse for a medic station.

"I'll have to get the blankets from our packs. I left them outside."

"S'OK. Go..." Kakashi replied, shivering. At least the bedding was soft. At least there was a pillow. He was so tired. And so tired of how fucking bad it hurt.

ooo

It was dark and chilly in the mountain hut, the damp mist outside seeping through a thousand cracks between the boards, and the only light coming from kerosene lanterns Iruka had found while searching the place. He had forced the second draught of Tsunade's potion down the Jounin's throat when he came back with the blankets, and it had seemed to help, lessening the grit-teethed shivering and allowing the man to sleep a little.

The second dose of the ANBU elixir worked rapidly, spreading warmth and energy through Kakashi's body, suppressing pain. Chakra Support Liquid, they called it - simple, descriptive. All ANBU field operatives carried it. It did what its name implied, boosting the chakra of an injured shinobi, filling in the gaps, at least for a little while. But it took a toll, slowing down actual healing, and could impair chakra control, which is why repeated use was frowned on. And while it could handle fatigue, pain, and chakra damage, it couldn't halt the creeping effects of the nerve toxin.

Numbness crept up Kakashi's limbs, making them heavy and unresponsive. He realized with a dull dread that it was paralyzing him, and hoped it wouldn't shut down his heart or lungs. 'Probably won't,' he decided. 'What was that phrase Iruka used? _maximize suffering? _Akumaru was ANBU's master of torture, Ibiki's sensei, he wouldn't have used a simple poison.' He drifted in a timeless haze, neither awake nor asleep, listening to the oddly musical sounds that accompanied each painful, shallow breath.

'Now, while Kakashi has the medicine in him, I have to get him out of those soiled clothes,' Iruka decided. "I'm sorry to wake you, Kashi, but I can't let you stay in those dirty things, the risk of infection..."

"I know." Kakashi didn't even open his eye.

Iruka didn't try to lift the injured man again, afraid to set off another seizure. He used a kunai to slit the pants legs, and front and arms of the heavy sweater, and peeled the blood-stiffened material back from the pale, red-stained body of his lover. Exposed to the cool air, Kakashi shivered, moaning at the painful motion. Iruka immediately pulled up both thermal blankets and lay down next to his chilled partner, trying to transfer his own body heat to the jounin.

When the shivering subsided, Iruka spoke. "I have to change your dressings, too, Kakashi. You... that seizure... "

"I know." The response was quieter this time.

The chuunin pulled bandage rolls and more paper-wrapped clotting-jutsu sponges from the cabinets, grateful that the medical station had been left at least partly stocked. He steeled himself for the ugliness he expected to uncover, but the sight still took his breath away. Kakashi groaned when the gauze was pulled off, and his abdomen twitched ominously, but he soon fell still and silent again.

"S'bad... Ruru?" Kakashi asked after a moment, while Iruka sat frozen, staring at the gaping wound.

"It... It's not that bad."

It was bad. The seizure had torn the edges of the gash open, lengthening it, and purplish, bruised-looking coils of small intestine bulged through the gap. Black clots dotted the tissue; at least he was clotting, not continuing to bleed. And the organs themselves seemed uncut. Still, it was a horrifying sight. Not the sort of wound a man could easily survive. Iruka suppressed a shudder and set to work re-bandaging, trying to pull the edges of the wound together without hurting Kakashi too much.

For the first time, Kakashi was grateful for the creeping numbness of the nerve-deadening poison. He focused his attention on the pins and needles sensations in his arms and legs, on the throbbing behind his eyes, rather than the agonizing fire consuming his abdomen as Iruka worked to re-dress the sword wound. He ground his teeth together and panted shallowly when the chuunin moved on to the chest injury; broken ribs grated and ached under Iruka's touch, and the poisoned kunai wound was badly inflamed. He blew out a shaky, relieved breath when Iruka sat back and pulled the blankets up over his body again.

Iruka knew it had been torture. He cursed every motion he had to make, hating the knowledge that there was nothing he could do that wouldn't hurt Kakashi. He tried to forget that this was the body of his lover, to think only in terms of biology, physiology.

"You want a little water?" Iruka leaned over Kakashi, holding a bottle.

"No."

"I... I think you should try, Kakashi. That blood-chakra pill..."

"Not... yet." Kakashi's lips and tongue felt thick and clumsy.

"Please. Just a sip." Iruka's voice held a note of desperation that unnerved Kakashi. He forced his eye open, searching the face of his lover. It took incredible strength and control for him to lift one cold, dead-feeling hand and reach for the younger man's, and his whole arm shook violently. Iruka immediately grabbed on, holding the quaking appendage still. He squeezed, and was alarmed anew when Kakashi did not tighten his grip in response.

"Your hand... Can't you feel me?"

"S'OK... Iruka... I'm just... tired. Little water... Then sleep... K?"

"Hai... hai... OK." Iruka tucked Kakashi's hand back under the blankets, then gently slipped his palm under the silver hair and lifted the jounin's head, tipping a trickle of water into his mouth.

Kakashi swallowed, grimacing. The cold water was an unwelcome presence in his stomach, even if his body did need it. He closed his mouth against the bottle, refusing more than the one mouthful. When Iruka pulled it away and recapped it, Kakashi relaxed.

"Sorry, Ru... Just can't drink right now." Kakashi gave a shallow cough, but managed a weak smile.

"It's OK. Are you... Does it hurt too bad? Can you sleep?"

"Take off... hitai-ate... The knot..."

"Oh. Of course!" Iruka pulled the bandana off, exposing Kakashi's scarred eyelid, which he kept closed over the Sharingan eye. "Will you be OK like that?"

"Mmm... Sleep now." The medicine in his system quelled the worst of the pain, and his exhaustion was overwhelming. Iruka's warm presence next to him was comforting. Kakashi surfed the border of consciousness, slowly falling into an uneasy sleep.

Iruka watched the tension around Kakashi's mouth relax, the knotted brow fall slightly smoother. He listened intently, glad in a disturbing way for the regular burbling wheeze that told him his lover was still drawing breath. Kakashi had told him that unlocking the barrier on the aid station would send a signal for help, that a medic would answer the summons, but the waiting was torture.

To calm himself, Iruka decided to keep a log, to track what had happened. He and Kakashi would have to complete mission reports, he reasoned, even though this hadn't started out as a mission. Well, Kakashi's had. And he was _going_ to make it back to Konoha and he was _going_ to have to complete a mission report. And killing Shida Akumaru could be considered a general assignment for any shinobi of the Leaf who happened to encounter him.

He started with an account of his message from Kakashi, his suspicion that he had been followed, their meeting. He was careful how he worded it - even if their relationship was not something anyone would frown at, it wasn't necessarily something he wanted documented in the annals of Konohagakure. He carefully detailed the encounter with the rogue former ANBU, Kakashi's horrifying fight, the aftermath, and how they had ended up at this dismal sanctuary.

"Sunday, 17:30 - Arrived at sta." Iruka wrote. "Hatake Kakashi condition deteriorating. Seizures. Resp. distress. Administered ANBU-CSL. Patient stabilized." He used the shorthand typical of this kind of report.

"18:00 - HK condition survey: existing injuries - several day-old bruise to right cheek, severe bruising and suspected fracture(s) to left ribcage apx. 19 cm below armpit. Observed combat wounds: 1st - apx. 21 cm slash extending from navel to rt. groin above hip. Penetrates to viscera but not through. Small bowel bruised, no obvious perforation. 2nd - Kunai penetration between suspected fx. ribs on left side. Wound transverse, apx. 5 cm. Unknown neuro. poison introduced through kunai wound."

He stopped writing, fighting to maintain his detachment, listening for each rasp of breath in and out of Kakashi's slack mouth. He gingerly touched Kakashi's cheek, feeling for fever, then his hands and feet, finding them icy. 'He needs blood. Where's that fucking medic?' Iruka looked at his pocket watch, then resumed writing.

"18:30 - HK sleeping. Breathing raspy. No obvious fever. Extremities cold. Blood loss amt. unknown but considerable. Administered one dose kinketsueki in field, apx 16:15. Next dose 20:15, if HK able to ingest H2O"

He continued to write, detailing each step he had taken in caring for Kakashi. Writing it all out like this made it a little easier, at least for now, to regain his cool shinobi detachment. It was shattered though, when Kakashi shifted in his sleep, moaned, and croaked out Iruka's name.

He was only partly awake, wasn't even aware he had called for Iruka. But when the chuunin lifted the lantern to illuminate Kakashi's face, it set off a cavalcade. He must have unconsciously opened the Sharingan, or maybe it was just a new level of torment from the poison, but the light flooded in like a knife in the brain, and Kakashi's body reacted. A shudder passed through him, then his head snapped back, spine bowed into a devastating arch, and his arms and legs vibrated with a violent, spastic tension. The vibrations grew until they were shaking his whole frame. A guttural cry rose from his chest as the seizing muscles forced the air out of his aching lungs and tore at the belly wound. The sound rasped to a halt, though, as Kakashi's breathing stopped, held hostage by the iron-like tension arcing his back.

Iruka was beside himself. He dropped the lantern, extinguishing it, and rammed his hands under Kakashi's head, trying to prevent him from suffering a head injury during the convulsion. Time stretched and slowed to an infinitesimal pace, and Iruka watched helplessly as pain and panic flashed in Kakashi's wide eyes. It was both a greater horror and a mercy when the jounin lost consciousness, his lips taking on a bluish hue from lack of oxygen.

Then as suddenly as it had started, the seizure relented, and Kakashi fell limp, chest heaving as he sucked in desperately needed air. Iruka jerked the twisted blankets back, exposing what he had feared, a rapidly expanding, bright red blot soaking the bandage over the injured man's abdomen. He tore the gauze away and slapped one of the clotting sponges over the gash, compressing it tightly and directing a healing jutsu into the wound. The jutsu, this action, was almost becoming familiar to him. He feared the bleeding would never stop, but it did, and he leaned back, breathing shakily.

Iruka had not a moment's rest, though, for Kakashi began to choke and cough, bubbles of blood rising between his unconscious, parted lips. Iruka gagged, overwhelmed for a moment by the horror of it all, but quickly recovered himself. He turned Kakashi onto his side and bent his head forward to make it easier for him to clear his airway, wiping away the mess he coughed up with yet more gauze held in shaking hands. When the jounin's breathing returned to normal, Iruka eased him onto his back again, not wanting to place additional strain on the abdominal wound.

As he started to come around, Kakashi groaned, tossing his head from side to side, gasps of pain issuing from the mostly unconscious man. Iruka ransacked the hut, dashing from cabinet to cabinet, throwing doors open, yanking drawers out, searching for something, anything, to ease Kakashi's distress. At last he found a cache of vials and syringes. He grabbed several and was back at the jounin's side in a flash, where he drew the drug into the syringe and injected it into Kakashi's arm in almost a single motion, his many hours of field medic training coming into play flawlessly.

Iruka straightened his back, anxiously watching Kakashi as he waited for the morphine to take effect. When the tension eased away from the jounin's features and his panting breaths slowed and quieted, Iruka dropped the empty vial and syringe he had been unconsciously holding, and they clattered to the wooden floor and rolled away. The chuunin's hands were shaking uncontrollably as he leaned back against the wall. He stared dully around, then picked up the pen again.

"19:00," he wrote, then paused, "Bright light brought on another seizure, caused abd. wound to reopen, resp. bleeding and distress. Administered chakra first aid and morphine 12 mg IM."

He opened his watch with still shaking hands, closed it, stared hard at Kakashi, listening to his rasping breath for a moment, then wrote, "19:30 - HK stable."

He couldn't bring himself to write it down, but the words echoed in his head. 'You did this to him. You led Akumaru to him. You might as well have held the kunai yourself.' He put the pen down again, picked up one of Kakashi's cold hands, and stared at the red-stained fingertips.

"I'm so sorry, Kashi," he whispered to the unconscious jounin, "Please, _please_ don't die." Before he could stop himself, before Rule 25 could take effect, his fatigue and fear got the best of him, and Iruka found himself shaking with silent, sobbing tears.

ooo

In a bigger medical station, far to the south, a message was delivered. Two shinobi, presumably of the Leaf, had entered a disused shelter belonging to Konoha but situated outside the Fire Country's borders. The correct seal had been used, the one indicating that they were in distress, that aid was requested. Arashida Numa was next up for assignment. An older woman by shinobi standards, Numa was 54, a ninja of the Mist, but currently wearing the blank hitai-ate and unmarked clothing of the Neutral Medical Corps of the Five Villages. She had been part of its founding along with Konoha's leader, the Godaime Hokage. It was fate, she decided that put her in the position of responding to the distress call of two of Tsunade's own.

The short woman filled her pack with supplies, wondering what she would encounter. There were no active wars in the area, but shinobi had a way of getting themselves hurt pretty badly. She shrugged her vest on, strapped a weapon's pouch to her waist - she was a medic, but she was also a ninja, and she would not walk into a potentially hostile situation such as this unarmed - shouldered her pack, and set off for her summoning tower. She would call upon the bat spirits again - the pair who had relayed the distress call would have already notified their clan that they would be wanted. A huge, leathery-winged creature rose to greet her, and with a bow of gratitude and respect, Numa mounted its furry back and rode into the darkening sky.

_End Chapter 10_

ooo ooo ooo

Japanese words:

_mayaku no senbon - _narcotic or illegal drug senbon

Author's Note:

Is it too much? Please review and tell me what you think.

Thanks to all who have reviewed so far. Your encouragement and feedback are priceless to me. I re-read them again and again, to encourage myself when I feel stuck.

For faith-b, who inquired - my health continues to be erratic, which definitely has an effect on how frequently I can update. Thanks for your patience and forbearance. And for your reviews, which I always look forward to.

Extra special thanks to:

HikaruxYuki, L-lamb, Momo-chan, WinterofourDiscontent, Hey-Diddle-Diddle and Pesha Vashti for early reads and feedback.

Hey-Diddle-Diddle for the name of the _mayaku no senbon._


	12. Oath of Neutrality

**It's Nothing**

_by Nezuko, Prince of Rats_

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. The characters Umino Iruka and Hatake Kakashi, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

"I'm so sorry, Kashi," he whispered to the unconscious jounin, "Please, _please_ don't die." Before he could stop himself, before Rule 25 could take effect, his fatigue and fear got the best of him, and Iruka found himself shaking with silent, sobbing tears.

ooo

In a bigger medical station, far to the south, a message was delivered. Two shinobi, presumably of the Leaf, had entered a disused shelter belonging to Konoha but situated outside the Fire Country's borders. The correct seal had been used, the one indicating that they were in distress, that aid was requested. Arashida Numa was next up for assignment. An older woman by shinobi standards, Numa was 54, a ninja of the Mist, but currently wearing the blank hitai-ate and unmarked clothing of the Neutral Medical Corps of the Five Villages. She had been part of its founding along with Konoha's leader, the Godaime Hokage. It was fate, she decided that put her in the position of responding to the distress call of two of Tsunade's own.

The short woman filled her pack with supplies, wondering what she would encounter. There were no active wars in the area, but shinobi had a way of getting themselves hurt pretty badly. She shrugged her vest on, strapped a weapon's pouch to her waist - she was a medic, but she was also a ninja, and she would not walk into a potentially hostile situation such as this unarmed - shouldered her pack, and set off for her summoning tower. She would call upon the bat spirits again - the pair who had relayed the distress call would have already notified their clan that they would be wanted. A huge, leathery-winged creature rose to greet her, and with a bow of gratitude and respect, Numa mounted its furry back and rode into the darkening sky.

_End Chapter 10_

ooo ooo ooo

_Chapter 11: Oath of Neutrality_

Arashida Numa was nothing if not an experienced and competent field medic. In her more than 40 years of service, she'd contended with the most adverse of conditions and saved the lives of countless comrades and civilians alike. So she knew immediately, when she surveyed the room, that this wasn't going to be a walk in the park. The smell of blood and sickness pervaded the room, rising from clothing and bandages discarded on the floor. A man whose face was almost as colorless as his silver hair lay covered on a futon, with an exhausted looking comrade sleeping against the wall, apparently keeping watch over him.

The medic did nothing to mask her presence. She stood motionless in the doorway, projecting her chakra into the room, wanting to wake the shinobi well before she approached. A battle-injured ninja taken by surprise was easily one of the most dangerous creatures on earth - it would be senseless to let herself be attacked. She waited warily. The young man must have been truly exhausted, she thought, for it was almost 30 seconds before he sensed her, opening his eyes and tensing defensively.

In that time, in the dim light, she studied the man on the futon. Obviously suffering from blood-loss, she decided - there was no way he was naturally that pale, no matter how light his complexion. His brushy silver hair and delicate features stirred some memory within her. These men were Konoha ninja - a hidden village whose shinobi she had fought against more than once - had she encountered him before? Recognition hit her with a shock as it suddenly clicked into place - Konoha's White Fang! But no - he was dead - had died more than two decades ago, so - his son: Hatake Kakashi. The infamous Copy-Nin of Fire Country. This _ was_ a surprise.

Numa took a step into the room, but the ninja sitting watch immediately blocked her path, leaping between her and the patient. When he stood, he towered over her, his presence bristling with defensive hostility. The medic held out empty hands and raised her face so the young man - a chuunin by the looks of his uniform - could see it clearly. In a calm, low-pitched voice, she recited the ritual words that identified her as a member of the Neutral Medic Corps: "I am here under the Code of Neutrality. I am here under the Code of the Healer Shinobi of the Five Villages. My duty is only to those who suffer. My loyalty is only to those who seek my aid."

She turned her gaze to his face. Surely the man was expecting her - he'd called for aid, after all - and her own uniform marked her as a neutral medic. "Did you summon me, Konoha Ninja?"

"Y-y- yes," he stammered.

He had seemed to relax a little at her words, but his answer was incomplete. The healer nin stared up at him expectantly for a moment before prompting, "And do you seek my..."

"I, Umino Iruka, Chuunin of Konoha, seek your aid, Healer, for myself and my comrade, injured and sickened and suffering." His recitation of the ritual words seemed to calm him - his voice became less tense, more fluent, as he uttered them.

_'Ah'_ - she had been right - _'chuunin.'_ "Then I am here bound to do you no harm, but only to aid you if I may," Numa completed the ritual. She looked up again into the young man's expressive eyes. Assessing, analyzing. He didn't appear injured, only tired and anxious. And so young. Still in his twenties. The thin scar that crossed his face somehow made him look younger, more vulnerable. She brushed past him, a brief touch to asses the state of his chakra - somewhat depleted but strong and stable - and knelt on the floor next to the futon.

Numa decided to hazard a guess, feeling even more confident, now that she was close to him, in her identification of her patient. "It must have been a formidable foe indeed to have felled Hatake-sama. Did you witness the battle, Chuunin?"

"Yes. Uh, most of it," The young man answered, clearly caught off guard by her question. "I was under command to stay hidden," he stammered. "The enemy is dead, but I think his weapons were poisoned. I collected them, and his clothes, in case there might be an antidote."

"Smart," Numa remarked, beginning to examine the patient, "That may help indeed."

So there had been a fight. A single enemy, now dead. Poison had been used. And there was no denial of the name - was she right? There was one more test to make.

The unconscious man's face and upper body were turned to the right. _'No doubt to keep him from aspirating, which means he's been vomiting,'_ Numa considered, as she rolled him onto his back. She pulled open his right eye, peering into it with a pen-light, finding a sluggish reaction. The pupil seemed dilated and the eye swam with a teary film - no doubt the effects of whatever poison had been used. She reached for the scarred left eyelid to pull it open.

"Stop." The voice from the bed was a breathless grunt.

Numa pulled her hand back, surprised to have been addressed by her seemingly unconscious patient. Before she could respond, however, he was thrown into a violent seizure. She was almost certain of his identity now - why else would he have tried to prevent her from looking into his eye, unless it was indeed the fabled Sharingan? But it didn't matter who he was if he died before she could treat him.

The other Leaf-nin was almost instantly kneeling at his partner's head, cushioning it before it could slam back into the floor. "This is what it's been like, Oisha-sensei," he said, sparing her a quick, tense glance before his focus snapped back to the convulsing man in his lap. He seemed to know what he was doing, but he couldn't quite keep the note of panic out of his voice, Numa noticed.

Her patient's face was pulled into a hideous grimace, and his strained lips were turning a slaty color as he struggled for breath. There was an alarming, wet gurgle of blood in his chest. The seizure arched his body backward in a tense bow, a classic hallmark of several neurotoxins, and obviously the first symptom to treat. Numa produced a vial of an anticonvulsant and injected a dose into one shuddering arm, a little surprised, despite her training and experience, at how much strength she had to exert to hold the limb steady. She continued to calmly manage the crisis, her movements almost automatic as she grabbed an oxygen cannula from the wall and connected it to a small green canister she produced from her bag, then slipped it over Kakashi's face.

The drug worked rapidly, stilling the spasms, and the oxygen eased the blue tinge from his lips. "Hmm. Well at least we know what class of poisons we're dealing with," the medic muttered, more to herself than to Iruka or her patient, who now lay unconscious and bleeding before her. During the seizure his color had darkened from ivory to frankly cyanotic in only a few seconds, and his breathing was a wet rasp - a sure sign of lung compromise - so she wasn't surprised to find his chest wrapped in bloodied bandages. She turned her attention to the wound on Kakashi's belly, where more fresh blood welled up through the soaked dressing. Numa lifted the gauze, then pushed it back down and held it with a firm hand.

"Here, come around to his side and keep pressure on this," she ordered Iruka, grateful for the extra pair of hands. The abdominal wound was severe - clearly a sword cut - and had been reopened by the force of the spasms. Her brief glimpse had shown contused-looking small bowel bulging through blood-smeared, porcelain-white skin that curled back at the edges from deeply-sliced muscle and glistening exposed fat.

_'This chuunin must have done some fairly expert chakra work to have kept him stable, with injuries like these,'_ she thought. She was even more impressed with his handiwork when she probed the chest injury, finding the telltale signs of an advanced type of chakra healing deep within the wound.

"Looks like you know field medicine. You did a good job, Chuunin."

"I... what?" he replied, bewildered, turning a distraught face to her.

Numa was a little taken aback by Iruka's tears. '_He's crying? Is he injured, too?' _The healer looked at him closely. She saw that his left arm was bandaged around the biceps, but there was little blood, and he moved the arm fairly easily. The only other mark on him, the scar across his nose and cheeks, was clearly many years old. The rounded curve of his cheek spoke of youth, but his face held the steely tension she'd learned to recognize in all the men and women whose duty-bound lives as ninja led them to witness horrors undreamed of by those they were sworn to protect. Beneath that though, on this man's face, there was a more profound grief, a hollowness, and a shocked pain. Not just stolen innocence, but some deeper hurt, something fresher and more poignant. It glittered behind his rich brown eyes when his gaze fell across his companion's pallid face. '_There is something more at work here than the surface shows...'_

"You did a good job," she repeated, "You dressed these wounds well, even this chest wound, and these are tricky." She indicated the place where the enemy kunai had stabbed between Kakashi's ribs, "You undoubtedly saved Hatake-sama's life."

Iruka's mouth hung open. "No... I... that is..." More tears welled up in his eyes and his voice cracked and strangled on his words.

"It's OK, it's OK. It's going to be alright," she soothed, reaching a hand out to pat one of his, while he continued to compress his comrade's bleeding abdomen. The young man was clearly strained almost to the point of breaking. _'Hang on, kid.'_ Numa thought, looking at Iruka,_ 'I'll need your help to pull your buddy through this, if he has any chance at all.'_

She mentally toured the little medical shelter, appraising its facilities. Not much beyond the basics, but it would have to suffice. At least there was running water and antiseptic soap. And it was stocked with some essentials. The chuunin had already found and made use of ointment and bandages, and judging from a bottle and syringe lying on the floor, he had given the injured man morphine. Still, she was glad she had brought her full medical kit with her.

"We'll take care of this, OK, Shinobi?" She squeezed Iruka's hand and smiled, relieved when he sniffed and nodded, muttering a small apology for his outburst.

"Your friend will be alright. We can get him through this." Numa emphasized the 'we' - if this young man was like most of the ninja she'd worked with in her career, he would focus better and hold up longer if he knew he had a role to play. And she needed him stable and focussed if she was to help him and his companion. Only he could tell her what had happened, and how long ago. How much poison had gotten in, what medicines and healing jutsus he had already used. And since this was clearly a surgical case, and he was obviously skilled, she could use his help with anesthesia and asepsis.

"Just keep pressure on that until the bleeding stops. I'm sure you know by now how to tell when it's safe to release the compression." She directed, receiving a nod from Iruka in reply.

She looked again at her patient's face, sucking in her breath, then blowing through pursed lips. It really _was_ Konoha's Sharingan Copy Ninja, the genius Hatake Kakashi. His fellow Leaf-nin hadn't corrected her use of the name, and there was the scarred eye and the way the barely conscious and grievously injured jounin had tried nonetheless to stop her from examining it.

What a shock that under the silver hair this man's face was so young, no more than thirty-one or two, she guessed. She'd first heard of the genius son of the White Fang twenty years ago at least, and though she knew he was still a child then, despite his shinobi status, she really hadn't integrated that fact. Now, looking at him and his soft-faced companion, it struck her again that she and her kind were in the business of sending children to war.

Numa stood and searched the cabin's cupboards, pulling out medications and equipment, supplementing her finds with more materials from her capacious pack. Iruka watched numbly as the healer set up and started an intravenous line, hanging two bags, one large with a clear solution, one small with something opaque and yellowish inside.

"We need to keep him hydrated and to keep the seizures under control. This'll help with the blood loss," the medic patted the clear bag as she spoke, "I've given him a sedative and I'm starting an antibiotic - do you know if he has any allergies?"

Iruka shook his head.

"You don't know or he has none?" Numa's voice was business-like and alert, cutting through the fog in Iruka's exhausted brain.

"I don't think he has any."

"Good. I'll give him something to keep his pain under control, too. I see you've used morphine. When did you last dose him?"

"About... about midnight, I think." Iruka's voice cracked as he pictured the way Kakashi's features had been twisted in agony right before he'd given him that shot.

"Good, good. Why don't you tell me what treatments you've applied? Starting with what you did in the field." Numa pushed a little, trying to get the chuunin to detach from whatever emotional burden he was clearly laboring under.

"I... I started a log - it's all in there..." Iruka answered, feeling suddenly too tired to go through the whole story, afraid he would get something wrong or leave out something critical.

"OK. Read it to me. I'll take over here." Numa knelt next to Iruka, gently pulling his hands away from Kakashi's abdomen when he didn't respond right away.

"When is the last time you ate something, Chuunin?" Numa asked sharply.

"It's Iruka, and... uh... I don't remember... maybe noon?"

"Right. Do you have rations with you? That's over fourteen hours ago. You need fuel. I need you to keep going a little longer."

"I'll get something in a minute." Iruka reached across Kakashi's still body for his notes.

"No, you'll get something now," Numa corrected. "You can read me your notes while you eat. I have energy bars in my pack if you don't have anything suitable."

"I... I have some..."

"Good. Get it now, Iruka-san."

Numa looked up, watching Iruka carefully. He rose unsteadily, moving around Kakashi to resume his former seat against the wall, taking a foil-wrapped bar from a pocket of his vest. His stupor was more than just worry and exhaustion - the subtle shake of his hands as he opened the packet confirmed her suspicion that the chuunin was long overdue for a meal.

"You're probably dehydrated, too. Drink some water, please," Numa instructed. Given the remoteness of the medical station, and the terrain it was in, she wasn't surprised at his degraded condition.

When Iruka had eaten a little, he started to read aloud from his notes. Numa nodded appreciatively. "You've done an excellent job, Iruka-san."

"No, I just..."

"Yes, you have. Don't argue with me. Just keep reading."

While she listened, she examined the belly wound more carefully, pleased to see that the cut was clean, and despite the many hours and repeated trauma, the tissue was still pink and free of the putrid odor of necrosis. It seemed that by some miracle - or more likely a last-ditch protective jutsu - the man's viscera had remained intact, a blessing he should be _most_ thankful for. She'd try to seal the edges a little for now, but until the danger of seizures were over, there was no point in closing the wound only to have it reopened. If she stabilized him now, they could attempt the surgery in the morning.

"It's been over fourteen hours since the attack, then?" She asked, when Iruka came to the end of his notes.

"Yes. It was just after noon."

"Then we're dealing with a torture poison. Otherwise it would have killed him already." Her voice was matter-of-fact, almost blunt.

"Ye- yes, that's what we thought, too." Iruka answered, looking at Kakashi.

"You did, did you?" Numa looked at Iruka appraisingly. "You discussed this when he was more alert?"

"Yes. On the trail, when we stopped to rest."

"I'm sure you are not at liberty to discuss your mission, but I assume your opponent was also ninja. Do you know his village?"

Iruka just looked at Numa, wary of her probing. She _said_ she was a Neutral, and the oath was supposed to be binding, but the events of the last 48 hours had only served to heighten his natural distrust.

"It will give me some idea what the base was," Numa prompted, sensing his caution, "What countermeasures to take. Different villages use different poisons for torture." Her tone remained calm, businesslike. Somehow at odds with her words.

"It was... It may have been a Leaf poison," Iruka answered after a long, silent moment. Shinobi caution was blurring into near paranoia in his exhausted, traumatized psyche. But trusting this medic was his only chance at helping Kakashi- at _saving _ Kakashi. "Probably one of the older ones. Strychnine and organo-phosphate most likely make the base, but it would have other components, and probably several binding jutsu."

"I see. I'll add atropine to his meds, then." Numa picked up one of the packets she'd assembled and hung it with the other IV bags, connecting the tubing at a Y juncture. That little tidbit clouded the picture considerably - they had been fighting one of their own?

"This was originally a Leaf med station. Would they have stocked a specific antidote?" the medic asked, as she mixed and connected the medication.

"I don't know..." Iruka paused, carefully considering how much detail he dared tell this unknown, supposedly neutral shinobi. "Probably not. We don't use those in the field much. I'm not even sure it was really one of ours. But the enemy - he was a renegade. Missing ten years." If need be, he decided, he could do away with her, once she'd healed Kakashi. _If_ she could heal Kakashi...

"Well, I'll do the best I can with what I have, then," Numa said, returning to her patient's side. She formed a sequence of hand seals, gathering healing chakra in her palms.

"Wait, what are you going to do?" Iruka asked, alarmed.

"It's an electric-based healing jutsu - slows nerve impulses. If it's strychnine and organo-phosphate as you say, this should reduce the hypersensitivity - help stop the seizures. And help with pain." Numa held her hands poised over Kakashi's injured side.

"Are you sure? If I'm wrong about the poison, will this hurt him?"

"Oh I don't think you're wrong. The symptoms point to your being right, at least about the base elements." _'And you seem to know a fair amount about these types of poisons'_ she added to herself. _'What secrets are you hiding from me, Leaf-Chuunin?'_

Iruka swallowed, then nodded, watching Kakashi closely.

Numa's hands connected with Kakashi's body, and her chakra flooded into his nervous system, tracing down the branching, twisted pathways. She started at the poisoned blade's point of entry, expecting and finding the most traumatic nerve shock there. In the jounin's body the jutsu and medications fought the poison's effects, damping the unnatural resonance that was responsible for the fierce muscle cramps, the seizures, the torture it was designed to put its victim through.

As Numa worked, Iruka was relieved to see the tension fall away from Kakashi's muscles. The unconscious jounin seemed to breathe easier than he had since the fight, and his exposed chest and arms lost their over-hard edge, falling back to their usual smooth, sculpted state.

Numa sat back after several minutes, and shook her hands, then pulled a dense, black stone from a pouch at her waist and held it between her palms for several minutes. When Iruka looked quizzically at her, she explained, "Helps re-seal my own chakra, after I work an electric jutsu like that."

The medic turned back to the belly wound, peeling off the bandage and studying the cut. "I'm going to close this wound a little now," Numa stated. Better to explain every action to the jumpy chuunin. "You can help. Just stay where you are and hold his wrist and ankle on that side. Monitor him and feed healing chakra in, alright?"

"Alright." Iruka leaned forward, sliding one hand under the blanket to take hold of Kakashi's left ankle and holding his left wrist with the other. "He's so cold."

"I know. He needs blood, but we don't have any here. Unless you're his type?"

"I... I don't know about the sub-factors, but we're both O-pos." Iruka offered, feeling slightly hopeful at last. Here was something concrete and useful and meaningful he could do - something that might really make a difference.

"Let me work on this first," Numa replied. "I want to narrow the opening, even if just a little, and put a chakra barrier in place to seal out infection- although I suspect it's too late for that."

She pulled a bottle and brush from her bag, and began to decorate the edges of the wound on both sides of the cut, from navel to hip, with delicate script. When she had completed the seal, she held the edges of the wound closest to Kakashi's navel together, directing chakra in, drawing the cut surfaces to reunite. Nerves and vessels and fibers reconnected, layer by layer, healing together with only a smooth pink scar to mark where they had once been divided. When she sat back at last, panting and a little dizzy from her exertion, the wound was several centimeters smaller.

While she had worked, Iruka had monitored and supported. When the medic sat back, breaking the connection, he stayed hunched over, sliding his hands up Kakashi's limbs to rest at hip and shoulder. He could feel the strength of Numa's jutsu still humming through his lover's body, and Kakashi's own chakra felt stronger, more stable, than it had since they'd arrived.

"You're gonna be OK, Kashi, I swear it. You have to. Just... Just keep on hanging on." He brushed his lips over Kakashi's forehead.

The silver-haired ninja, white as alabaster, did not respond.

_END Chapter 11_

Author's Note:

Extra special thanks to my beta readers and cheering section (in reverse alphabetical order): WinterofourDiscontent, RadicalEdward, Messypeaches, Kaja, Carcinya, BitetheHandThatFeeds, AMidnightSunrise

Thank you to all my reviewers. Your feedback means a lot to me. Through you I've found that my writing has an effect on others - that it has meaning for more than just me. This chapter was a long time coming, and you've been patient. I can only tell you that I've been doing sensory research on pain. I'll be updating _Homecoming_ next, and posting a new humor one-shot as soon as I finish it.


	13. AWOL

**It's Nothing**

**Chapter 12: AWOL**

_by Nezuko, Prince of Rats_

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. Most of the characters, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

_The story so far: Kakashi was returning from a mission in the northeast, and sent a message to Iruka to meet him on the road home, the Azumatora, or Eastern Tiger Road. Iruka did join him, but he was tailed by a former Anbu captain of Kakashi's, Shida Akumaru. Shida had been a missing-nin for the past ten years, after slaughtering all of his teammates except Kakashi. Now he has sought Kakashi out. Kakashi and Akumaru fought, and although Kakashi managed to kill Akumaru, he was badly wounded and poisoned. Iruka has carried Kakashi to a remote, unmanned medic station, left over from the days of war between Konoha and Kumo. Arashida Numa, a member of a Neutral Medical Corps, has arrived at the hut to help Iruka. In the mean time..._

_(end of chapter 11)_

"I... I don't know about the sub-factors, but we're both O-pos." Iruka offered, feeling slightly hopeful at last. Here was something concrete and useful and meaningful he could do - something that might really make a difference.

"Let me work on this first," Numa replied. "I want to narrow the opening, even if just a little, and put a chakra barrier in place to seal out infection- although I suspect it's too late for that."

She pulled a bottle and brush from her bag, and began to decorate the edges of the wound on both sides of the cut, from navel to hip, with delicate script. When she had completed the seal, she held the edges of the wound closest to Kakashi's navel together, directing chakra in, drawing the cut surfaces to reunite. Nerves and vessels and fibers reconnected, layer by layer, healing together with only a smooth pink scar to mark where they had once been divided. When she sat back at last, panting and a little dizzy from her exertion, the wound was several centimeters smaller.

While she had worked, Iruka had monitored and supported. When the medic sat back, breaking the connection, he stayed hunched over, sliding his hands up Kakashi's limbs to rest at hip and shoulder. He could feel the strength of Numa's jutsu still humming through his lover's body, and Kakashi's own chakra felt stronger, more stable, than it had since they'd arrived.

"You're gonna be OK, Kashi, I swear it. You have to. Just... Just keep on hanging on." He brushed his lips over Kakashi's forehead.

The silver-haired ninja, white as alabaster, did not respond.

_Chapter 12: AWOL_

In Konoha, on Monday, Iruka's absence was noticed. In fact, it was much remarked upon by those that knew him. The generally reliable teacher was never absent without leave; it was unprecedented. In the canteen at the administration building, little knots of ninja sat and ate and gossiped together.

"Oi, maybe he's away on a secret honeymoon," said Genma, shoveling in a mouthful of spicy curry.

"What makes you say that?" his dining companion asked.

"Heard some of his kiddles bragging about tailing him on Saturday morning. Naruto and Sandaime's grandson – you know the kid, right?" Genma paused and looked up.

"Yeah, Konohamaru. Ebisu's brat," Raidou said, "Go on."

"Kids were going on about how they tailed Iruka-sensei early Saturday. He was headed out on the Azumatora." Genma paused for effect, taking another gargantuan mouthful of curry.

"Don't tease. And don't choke yourself, idiot," Raidou chided, refilling Genma's tea in anticipation of the gulps his partner would soon be consuming, judging by the fiery color of his face.

Genma pouted briefly at the epithet, but gratefully slurped the tea.

"Go on," Raidou prompted. "What's the big deal about him being on Eastern Tiger? People jog there all the time."

"Yeah, but he had full camping kit on, like he was headed out for a mission. And he didn't have a mission." Genma paused again.

"Dammit, Genma, quit being a prick and spill it already." Raidou gave Genma a surly glare.

Genma grinned knowingly. "Someone _else_ we know _did_ have a mission in the northeast. Kakashi. And he's overdue to return."

"Oh geeze, you think they're..."

"Come on, we both know they've been doing the nasty. And Tsunade's on to them. Izumo told me. Probably wanted to take a couple days to fool around before the official crap hits the fan and they have to do the Personal Alliance Risk Assessment paperwork and all that."

"I'm not buying it. We did the PARA's - a lot of people have. It's not like they're gonna tell 'em they can't sleep together, they just want to know where the liabilities to the village might lie." Raidou shook his head and rubbed a hand along his scarred face, an almost unconscious gesture, but it set his mind tumbling down darker paths. "Anyway Kakashi's overdue? How overdue? And what kind of mission was he on?"

"Infiltration and recovery, and I think he's seven days late at this point."

"Well that can't be good, can it?" Raidou frowned.

"Well you know him," Genma's voice was artificially light, "he'd be late to his own fu- Er- he's always late to things..."

Raidou gave Genma a silent look.

"You two seem to know an awful lot of things about other people's missions," a tart voice interrupted from behind Genma, as their buxom Hokage materialized there. "Come with me."

"Fuck," Raidou and Genma said almost simultaneously.

"What was that, Shiranui? Namiashi? On your feet." Tsunade scowled at the jounin.

"Yes ma'am. Sorry, ma'am," they apologized, scrambling up from their chairs and turning to bow at Tsunade.

"With me. You have a new assignment. I'm briefing you now." The feisty blonde woman clacked away from them at a rapid pace, expecting to be silently followed.

Genma and Raidou fell in step a respectful pace or two behind their leader.

"You think it's about the missing sensei?" Genma asked in coded hand signals.

"Don't know. But it's high priority whatever it is," Raidou signed back, looking worried.

They brushed past Izumo and Kotetsu, the hokage's chuunin office assistants, and Genma gave Izumo a wink. Another artificially cheery smile. Izumo knew what they were there for though. He just gave Genma a silent nod and watched the door close behind the jounin's back.

"Look, it could still just be something stupid, right? I mean, Iruka wouldn't just up and go missing nin, and there's no reason to think he'd be hurt," Kotetsu tried to cheer his sullen-faced comrade.

"He went to meet Hatake. I'm sure of it. I can just tell, Ko. Something's _wrong."_ Izumo brushed the long lock of hair off his forehead a moment. "She summoned his fucking _dog_ for godsake."

ooo

Inside Tsunade's office, Genma and Raidou found that the hokage had indeed summoned one of Kakashi's ninja canines. Pakkun, the dour-faced pug, sat on a chair looking, if possible, even more morose than usual. Morose and very, very focused.

When the Godaime took her seat behind her desk, the dog stood and gave her a bow. "Tsunade-sama, with all respect, only Kakashi has a contract to summon me."

"And what do you surmise from that, then, mutt? You are a sentient creature, and a trained ninja, loyal to the Leaf. I am Hokage. I have summoned you." Tsunade's voice was imperious, but with an undercurrent of something else. Worry.

"Where's Kakashi?" the dog sniffed suspiciously.

"That's exactly what I would like to know." Tsunade picked up a small scroll from her desk. "I received this report on his progress on his mission some days ago, and it was not encouraging. He is now seven days overdue. And his lover is now also missing."

Genma and Raidou stood uncomfortably, watching the interaction. It was already clear what their new mission was. A search and recovery. If Tsunade had even the slightest worry that Kakashi or Iruka had gone rogue, there would be hunter nins in the room getting this briefing, not themselves.

"Sit, all of you," Tsunade directed. She handed the scroll to Genma, along with a map and a mission brief. "Hatake's mission was an S-class infiltration and stolen scroll recovery in Lightening Country. According to that report," she indicated the scroll she had handed to Genma, "he had successfully recovered the contraband in question and neutralized the initial threat to Konoha, when he was compromised."

"Caught, you mean." Raidou felt the sick knot in his stomach tighten.

"Yes. And he escaped. He sent me that immediately after neutralizing the enemy nins who had apprehended him. They were an unexpected complication. Our advance intelligence did not indicate the initial target was in contact with Cloud shinobi." Tsunade sounded bitter.

"So it was definitely a Kumogakure operation?" Genma asked. He perused the scroll. "Kakashi says here that he believed the opposing ninja had no opportunity to contact their base."

"Yes," Tsunade agreed, "He believed he had successfully neutralized the threat entirely. That it was an invisible op. But in light of the fact that he and now Iruka-sensei are both missing, I am not so sure we can rely on that assessment."

Genma nodded, and passed the scroll to Raidou. "How does Iruka-sensei fit into the picture?"

"You said it yourself. He and Kakashi are lovers. If Kumo was aware of this, and has managed to recapture Kakashi, they may also have abducted Iruka as a pressure tactic. Especially since they were still keeping their relationship clandestine."

The long-haired special jounin frowned and nodded again.

"What reason do you have to believe that Iruka-sensei was abducted?" Raidou asked.

"None at the moment. I sincerely hope that you will find exactly what you were so vulgarly speculating about at dinner," Tsunade looked Genma in the eye. "But if that is not the case..."

Genma broke eye contact first, looking down and away.

"So I'm here as a tracker?" Pakkun asked.

"Yes. You're familiar with both missing men's scents. You are to follow Iruka's trail."

"We don't know for certain that they're together," said Genma, "Is the priority on locating Iruka or Kakashi?"

Tsunade templed her fingers and looked at the men and dog. "Priority is on locating Iruka-sensei first, since his disappearance is unexplained. However, this mission encompasses a potential search for both missing shinobi.

"Shiranui Genma, you are squadron leader. Your team will be Namiashi Raidou and Pakkun here, and Shizune will accompany you as field medic. This is a top priority, S-class S&R operation. If you find they are in well-fortified enemy hands, you will request Anbu support immediately. I will not sanction any stupid heroics resulting in further personnel loss. Understood?"

"Understood, Hokage-sama." Genma answered, "We will exercise all appropriate caution."

"Shizune has already been briefed. She will meet you at 1800 at Tiger Gate for departure."

"That gives us an hour," Genma said, looking at Raidou and Pakkun.

"Do you accept this mission, Konoha Shinobi?" The Godaime looked expectantly at the three ninja she had mustered for this mission.

"On my mark, I will carry out this mission to the best of my abilities," Raidou said, raising his right hand to touch the Anbu tattoo hidden within the sleeve on his left arm.

"On my mark,"Genma echoed, using the same gesture.

Pakkun bowed. "I accept."

"May you complete your duties swiftly and safely," Tsunade said, standing and bowing to her soldiers. "Go and come back."

ooo

Outside Tsunade's office, Pakkun looked up at Genma. "I'm going to do a little digging. I'll be at the east gate at 1800."

"That's fine," Genma answered. He turned to Raidou. "Shall we go home and pack?"

Raidou nodded, and they were about to leave, when Izumo stopped them.

"You're going to find Iruka, aren't you? And Kakashi-sensei?" the chuunin asked.

Kotetsu joined his friend, looking up at Genma and Raidou through narrow eyes. "He didn't just go AWOL for no reason."

"Do you know any more than what you already told me?" Genma asked. He pulled a senbon from his kit and slipped it between his teeth. The false cheeriness was gone, replaced by a calm determination.

"Iruka got a message from Kakashi, we think," Izumo answered.

"He was carrying around a little scroll late Friday," the shaggy-haired Kotetsu added, "And he went shopping and seemed all excited and happy. He'd been kind of mopey before that, worrying about Kakashi being late."

"So we think that's why he went out. To meet Kakashi on his way back from his mission. But they should have been back by now," Izumo continued. He pushed the lank hair back from his face, looking up at Genma with a plea in his eye.

"Did you talk to him at all?" Genma asked.

"No, not really. He did say he'd be gone Saturday, and to cancel his office hours." Izumo answered. "But he didn't say why."

"Yeah, we asked," Kotetsu added, "but he just said he was taking a personal day."

"And as far as you knew, he was planning to be at the Academy today?"

"As far as we knew, yes. He would have arranged a sub if he'd been planning to miss class. Same with his mission room shift."

Genma looked at Raidou. "What do you think?"

"He could have been planning a tryst. You said he was happy, and he went shopping, right?" asked the scar-faced man. "What was he shopping for?"

"Food. I saw him go to Nak's." Izumo gave his jounin colleagues an imploring look "You'll find him, right?"

"We'll do our best," Genma answered, touching his left biceps again in a silent vow.

ooo

The search party met at the head of the Eastern Tiger Road at exactly 1800, just at the sun was falling below the horizon. The wind had picked up, and heavy clouds blotted the orange glow, threatening rain.

Shizune greeted her fellow shinobi. "Genma, Raidou," she said. No honorifics needed – they had formed up as a squad many times before. "Where's our fourth?"

"Here," a grumpy voice announced from near her heel, as Pakkun materialized.

"Ah, Pakkun-san. Good evening."

"I have new information," the pug said, looking up at Genma.

Genma gave his team a swift nod, and squatted down to be at Pakkun's level. "Let's hear it."

Shizune and Raidou also knelt in conference, and gave the dog their attention.

"Tampopo, another one of our pack, delivered a message to Iruka on Friday afternoon. Kakashi summoned her two days earlier and gave her a mission to carry the scroll to Iruka immediately. She travelled without resting for two days straight, and arrived in Konoha Friday at around 1600."

"Did she know the message contents?" Genma asked.

"Love note, she thinks. Something telling Iruka to meet Kakashi on his way home."

Genma smiled at that, ever so slightly, and the senbon in his mouth twitched up. "Well that corroborates Izumo and Kotetsu's story. What was Kakashi's condition when she left him?"

"Battered. He looked like he'd been beaten, and he was tired and in pain but hiding it," Pakkun said, "That's what she told me. But she didn't think the note was a request for help. She said he didn't look any worse than he usually does after a mission, and he'd summoned another courier dog – one of the greyhounds – the day before, to carry a 'mission completed' message to Tsunade-sama."

"The scroll she showed us," Genma said.

Shizune shifted slightly, mentally tallying the items in her med kit again. _"Even if it turns out they're just playing hooky, if you find the Hatake brat, he's gonna need patching up,"_ Tsunade had told her.

Genma pulled out a canvas map and unrolled it on the ground. It was contoured and heavily marked with trails and symbols, and here and there annotations in a couple of different code systems and scripts. "Here's the Azumatora." He took the senbon from his mouth and used it as a pointer. "If Tampopo-san took two days full out jogging to get to Konoha," Genma dragged the tip of the senbon along a red line cutting towards the northeast, "then she probably left him here." He stabbed the needle at a spot high in the mountains at the southwestern edge of Lightening Country. "That sound right, Pakkun?"

"Yeah. Sounds right."

"So if we assume Iruka and Kakashi were both taking breaks to eat and sleep, and traveling at a decent but relaxed pace, they would probably have encountered each other in this region." Genma swept the senbon back and forth over a section of the map densely covered with symbols and a network of intersecting trails.

"That's still outside Fire Country," Raidou said. "Still exposed."

"Yeah," Genma nodded. "Pakkun, can you pick up any of Iruka's scent here?"

"Yes, but we're still inside Konoha," the dog answered. "His scent's all over the place here."

"Well, we know he was logged exiting this gate at 0530 Saturday morning, and was seen heading out on the Azumatora, so we'll stick to the road to start. I want to cover as much ground as possible as quickly as possible, assuming you find a trail to follow." Genma looked at his squad. "No breaks unless absolutely necessary. Pakkun will take point, Shizune and Raidou, you take left and right. I'll tail."

The other shinobi nodded. Genma stood and readjusted his pack, and his teammates did the same.

"Let's move out."

ooo

After two hours of swift travel, Pakkun stopped. "He left the road here," he said.

"What do you want to do? Can you tell where he went?" Genma asked.

"Let me check it out for a minute," the dog replied, putting his nose to the ground.

Genma nodded, and took out his canteen. While he watched Pakkun investigate the area, he drank, then passed the bottle to Raidou. "Have some water. You too, Shizune."

"You don't need to tell me," Shizune said, already drinking from her own canteen, "I'm a medic, remember."

"Oh, how could I forget?" Genma grinned.

"You can't, the number of times I've put you back together. Don't make me do it again this trip, understand?"

"Sure, sure. This isn't gonna be a combat mission if I can help it."

"You either, Raidou," Shizune said.

"Aww, but you like seeing us naked and bleeding, don't you?" Raidou retorted.

Genma held up a hand to cut them off as Pakkun returned.

"He hid in the tall grass here; he was apprehensive. Then he crisscrosses all over the place in those trees there," the dog said. "He was trying to lose someone tailing him."

"You know Naruto's scent?" Genma asked. "Is it out here?"

Pakkun sniffed the ground again, backtracking a little, then coming back to the waiting jounin.

"He was here, and that little brat he pals around with. The one who smells like Sandaime-sama did. Same time as Iruka was."

"Good. That's exactly what you should have found. We know Naruto and Konohamaru tailed Iruka-sensei that morning. This must be where Iruka ditched them." Genma looked up at the sky, where the heavy clouds were blocking out the moon. "Can you pick up Iruka's trail again?"

"He stayed in the trees, I think. He was taking more care to cover his tracks. But yeah, I can follow it," Pakkun said.

"Let's move on then. We're gonna get rained on, I think."

Raidou groaned and pulled his knapsack back on. "Damn rain."

They resumed their four-point formation and took to the trees, still on Iruka's trail.

ooo

Several hours later they stopped again. It was nearing 2:00 AM, and they were tired. They'd been running swiftly, and steadily gaining elevation, their exertions keeping them warm, which was a good thing, because the rain had come, bringing with it a chill that let them see their breath on the air. While they paused in the shelter of a bamboo grove, they stamped and shook to get the water off themselves. Genma's hair hung in slick curtains from underneath his sodden hitai-ate. The knotted ends of the bandanna drooped and dripped between his eyes, and he yanked it off his head and wrung it out, before smoothing it back on.

Raidou's usually spiky hair fell over in sad clumps, and raindrops channeled down the scar on his cheek. Shizune looked as bedraggled as her male comrades, rubbing her face with a dripping towel, merely moving the water around without drying it. Only Pakkun seemed little affected by the rain. He shook, showering the ankles and calves of his teammates, then seemed nearly dry.

"Damn mutt," Raidou grumbled, envying the dog. Their uniform vests shed the water well enough, and the heavy garments they wore under them kept some of the wet off, but the humans were generally cold, damp and miserable after running for nearly six hours in the driving late autumn rain.

"Iruka made camp here," Pakkun said, as he nosed around the grove.

"Can you tell how long he stayed?" Genma asked.

"Several hours. Slept here."

"Anything else?"

"I'm not sure, but..."

"What?"

"There's another smell. Another human. But it's masked. I don't recognize it."

Genma frowned and exchanged looks with Raidou. "So he had company."

"Not sure about that," Pakkun said, "I think there's a small time gap between Iruka's being here and that other scent."

"Is there any evidence that Iruka was uneasy or upset?" Raidou asked.

"No. He just slept. If anything, he smells happy."

"We need to eat," Shizune interrupted, setting down her pack. "And if you're willing to risk a fire, something warm to drink would be good for us, if you mean us to keep moving tonight."

"I think a fire would be safe. We have no reason to believe we're being tailed, and we _are_ still in Fire Country," Genma said. "Raidou, check the perimeter of the grove with Pakkun. Look for any signs of struggle or evidence that Iruka encountered this mysterious other person Pakkun's scenting. Shizune and I'll get a fire going and set up some rations. We'll rest here for an hour."

By the time Pakkun and Raidou finished their inspection of the surroundings, Genma and Shizune had a small canvas shelter erected and a fire flickering in a pit. Shizune prepared tea while Genma set out a meal of dried fish and onigiri for his teammates.

"You're not going to get too tired keeping that fire up, are you, Genma?" Shizune asked.

"Please. Ask Raidou if I ever have any trouble keeping it up." Genma briefly made the flames leap and curl into obscene shapes for emphasis, and Raidou laughed. "Besides, it's not entirely chakara-fed. I'm just giving it a little extra juice because of the rain."

"You don't have to be crude," Shizune turned her back on the fire, "I just don't want to run into a situation where you're chakara-depleted and have to fight."

"Shizune, this is different. We were at the end of a mission then, not the start of one," Raidou said softly.

"You don't even remember it, so what you have to say on the matter is irrelevant." Shizune thrust a tin cup of tea roughly into Raidou's hands. As she did, she looked at his face. Even though the burn scars across his nose and left cheek were most prominent, it was the faint mark on his forehead, mostly hidden by his hitai-ate, that drew her attention.

"Shizune." Raidou put his hand over hers before she could release the mug. "It's not going to be the same."

"Raidou's right, Shizune. If we _are_ facing any enemy action, and we don't even know that we will be, it's likely to be ordinary Kumo ninja, not Orchimaru's bastards with their curse-seals." Genma put a hand on his comrade's shoulder. "Sit and eat and get warm. We're moving soon. I want to be within the region we think it's likely Kakashi and Iruka would have met up by sunrise, if we can manage it."

Pakkun looked from one face to another. "What's she so worried about? You're not weak."

"Don't worry about it. Just ghosts of missions past coming to haunt in the dark of night." Genma smiled and offered Pakkun a rice ball and a piece of fish. It was another one of those smiles that didn't quite reach his eyes. A smile one sees on the faces of all experienced shinobi. A smile that says, _"It's painful, don't ask."_

Pakkun took the food and let the question drop.

ooo

By dawn the rain had stopped, though it threatened to begin again at any minute. The sun struggled to light the landscape through the thick overcast, as Genma called a halt once again. They stood on the rocky road, soaked and puffing in the cold mountain air, huddling close to each other for warmth. While Raidou took a compass reading, Genma pulled out his map and consulted it, then crouched down to talk to their tracker.

"How's the trail? Did the rain destroy the scent?" Genma asked Pakkun.

"It's fainter, but I can still smell him," Pakkun replied. He trotted back and forth, seeming agitated.

"What's the matter? Are you still picking up that other scent? Or anything of Kakashi yet?"

"There's something wrong," the dog answered, "but I can't tell what it is yet."

"What do you mean, wrong?" Genma asked.

"Wrong. Wrong like death. Just wrong," Pakkun snapped. "We should keep moving."

Genma glanced up at Shizune and Raidou, then back to the dog. "It's not just this area, is it?"

"No, it's not just this area! I can tell the difference between something that smells wrong and a bad memory." Pakkun was all but snarling at Genma now.

"Alright, we'll keep moving. Don't forget who your allies are, Pakkun," Genma said quietly.

As the team pressed onward, Shizune glanced over at Raidou, who looked grim, then back at Genma, who was scowling and scanning the landscape from side to side.

"What's the issue about this area?" she asked, "We already crossed over the border, so it can't be that."

"There were some big battles here, during the Cloud War," Raidou answered.

"Oh, of course..." Shizune reddened a little. "You were both here, weren't you?"

Raidou nodded.

"I was in Konoha, at the hospital. I didn't get sent out to the front," Shizune said.

"I know. You fixed my leg," said Genma. "You probably don't remember it."

"Well..."

"With the number of times she's had to fix you, you think she remembers every one?" Raidou joked, trying to lighten the mood a little.

"Guess not." Genma said with a wry smirk. He was about to say something else when Pakkun suddenly raced ahead, then ran back, so agitated that he barked.

Genma immediately dropped into a crouch, facing Pakkun. "What is it?"

"Blood! It's his blood! A lot of it! And a corpse!"

Shizune took a sharp breath, kneeling next to Genma, while Raidou drew a kunai and scanned the horizon.

"Whose blood, Pakkun? Iruka's?"

No, dammit! Kakashi's!" Pakkun danced back and forth in jerky paces, unable to be still. "Come on!"

"We're coming," Genma said, getting to his feet, "How old is the scent? And can you tell whose corpse it is?"

"It's a couple of days old, and the corpse is burned, but it might be that other scent." Pakkun dashed down the road as fast as his stubby legs could move, becoming a blur even to the experienced shinobi eyes on him.

Shizune, Raidou, and Genma took off after Pakkun, racing openly on the road now, following the frantic animal. They covered a couple of kilometers like that before they crested a small rise in the road and looked down to see a wide clearing on the left, where Pakkun was running in circles with his nose to the ground. In the road itself, though somewhat washed down by the rain, was a charred, man-sized shape.

"Status, now!" Genma ordered, in a voice that brooked no nonsense, once they reached Pakkun.

"Kakashi fought that man." Pakkun indicated the remains in the road. "He was wounded badly – there's so much blood I can't tell where it was coming from! His, the other guy's... There are traces of a Konoha poison in it, but he doesn't usually use those."

"Was Iruka here, too? Maybe it was his," Shizune said. "He knows a thing or two about poisons."

"He was here," Pakkun confirmed. He squirmed and sniffed at the air, eyes wide and anxious.

"Any others?" Genma asked, scanning the clearing.

"Just those three scents. From two days ago,"Pakkun looked up anxiously the jounin. "I can pick up his trail again. We need to go!"

"No. We need to evaluate this scene first," Genma said, "We'll get moving again as soon as we can, but whatever we do, we're not going in blind."

While Genma conferred with Pakkun, Raidou was inspecting the battlefield. He found places where bladed weapons had churned up the ground, and other evidence of the fight that had raged here. "Hey, over here!" Raidou called, bending down near the base of a tree at the edge of the field.

"Shizune, see what you can tell about the corpse," Genma instructed, then he raced over to where Raidou was beckoning. Pakkun followed close at Genma's heels.

"We're just fucking around!" he barked. "Kakashi's hurt! He's hurt bad and we're just fucking around!" The little dog growled at Genma, glaring at his team leader.

"Pakkun, you said yourself it was from two days ago. If Iruka wasn't hurt, then he's probably taking care of Kakashi. Now settle yourself and focus. We need to understand what happened here and what we may be facing when we find them." Genma was stern. He turned to Raidou. "What'd you find?"

"It's an old bunker from the war. It looks like someone was in it recently." He held up a scrap of gauze with a little dried blood staining it, and pointed to a faint bloody fingerprint on the tree's root. "They used an earth jutsu to enter. See where the dirt's softened and overturned?"

Pakkun had raced back to the area of ground where they had first found him, presumably where he detected the most blood. Shizune called to him. "Pakkun-san, can you tell if this corpse was poisoned?"

The dog ran over to her, panting and grunting. "He smells of it, but I don't know. I can't say. It's in the blood over there, too. We need to go to Kakashi now!"

"Pakkun..." Shizune started, but the dog had already dashed back to where Genma and Raidou crouched near the bunker.

"We're wasting time," Pakkun snarled. "What more do you need? He's dead, Kakashi's dying."

"You don't know that, Pakkun," Raidou said.

"Focus. Whose blood is this?" Genma held the scrap of bandage Raidou had found out to the dog, then pointed at the fingerprint.

Pakkun sniffed them both, then looked up even more alarmed. "It's Iruka. Now are you satisfied? I'm not gonna fuck around here anymore!" With that, he took of into the trees, presumably following a trail he scented.

"Shit." Genma stood and watched the dog. "Go, Raidou. We'll catch up."

Raidou didn't even wait for the words to leave Genma's mouth before he was dashing after the disappearing dog. As soon as Shizune got to Genma, they, too, broke into a run.

_END Chapter 12_

Author's Note:

Extra special thanks to my beta readers and cheering section (in reverse alphabetical order): Winter of our Discontent, Telosphilos, Messy Peaches, Laura Aoshi, Kaja, Hey Diddle Diddle, Carcinya, Bitter Eloquence, and Bite the Hand That Feeds


	14. Obito's Message

**It's Nothing**

**Chapter 13: Obito's Message**

_by Nezuko, Prince of Rats_

_This is a work of derivative fiction based on "Naruto" by Kishimoto Masashi. Most of the characters, and the world in which they live are the property of Kishimoto-sensei._

_The story so far: Kakashi was returning from a mission in the northeast, and sent a message to Iruka to meet him on the road home, the Azumatora, or Eastern Tiger Road. Iruka did join him, but he was tailed by a former Anbu captain of Kakashi's, Shida Akumaru. Shida had been a missing-nin for the past ten years, after slaughtering all of his teammates except Kakashi. Now he has sought Kakashi out. Kakashi and Akumaru fought, and although Kakashi managed to kill Akumaru, he was badly wounded and poisoned. Iruka has carried Kakashi to a remote, unmanned medic station, left over from the days of war between Konoha and Kumo. Arashida Numa, a member of a Neutral Medical Corps, has arrived at the hut to help Iruka. In the mean time, Iruka's absence from classes on Monday is very much noticed, as is the fact that Kakashi is well overdue from his mission. A search party consisting of Genma, Raidou, Shizune and Pakkun has been dispatched from Konoha to track down the missing sensei, with the assumption that Kakashi's lateness and Iruka's disappearance are linked._

_end of chapter 12:_

"We're just fucking around!" he barked. "Kakashi's hurt! He's hurt bad and we're just fucking around!" The little dog growled at Genma, glaring at his team leader.

"Pakkun, you said yourself it was from two days ago. If Iruka wasn't hurt, then he's probably taking care of Kakashi. Now settle yourself and focus. We need to understand what happened here and what we may be facing when we find them." Genma was stern. He turned to Raidou. "What'd you find?"

"It's an old bunker from the war. It looks like someone was in it recently." He held up a scrap of gauze with a little dried blood staining it, and pointed to a faint bloody fingerprint on the tree's root. "They used an earth jutsu to enter. See where the dirt's softened and overturned?"

Pakkun had raced back to the area of ground where they had first found him, presumably where he detected the most blood. Shizune called to him. "Pakkun-san, can you tell if this corpse was poisoned?"

The dog ran over to her, panting and grunting. "He smells of it, but I don't know. I can't say. It's in the blood over there, too. We need to go to Kakashi now!"

"Pakkun..." Shizune started, but the dog had already dashed back to where Genma and Raidou crouched near the bunker.

"We're wasting time," Pakkun snarled. "What more do you need? He's dead, Kakashi's dying."

"You don't know that, Pakkun," Raidou said.

"Focus. Whose blood is this?" Genma held the scrap of bandage Raidou had found out to the dog, then pointed at the fingerprint.

Pakkun sniffed them both, then looked up even more alarmed. "It's Iruka. Now are you satisfied? I'm not gonna fuck around here anymore!" With that, he took of into the trees, presumably following a trail he scented.

"Shit." Genma stood and watched the dog. "Go, Raidou. We'll catch up."

Raidou didn't even wait for the words to leave Genma's mouth before he was dashing after the disappearing dog. As soon as Shizune got to Genma, they, too, broke into a run.

**_Chapter 13: Obito's Message_**

"Wait, Pakkun!" Raidou shouted as he caught up to the fleeing dog, "We're coming. You're not gonna help him all by yourself." Insubordinate mutt, he added under his breath.

Pakkun slowed up a bit and let his pursuer meet his pace. Shizune and Genma were not far behind, but the agitated pug was clearly unhappy about waiting for them. When they arrived they held a hasty conference as they ran, clustered in a tight knot on the narrow, rocky trail.

"The body was male. Undoubtedly shinobi, and I think–" Shizune paused.

"You think," Genma prompted. "Go ahead and speculate, it can only help us."

"I think he was one of ours. A Leaf. But he hadn't been in the village in a long time."

Raidou glanced sharply at Genma, then more casually at Shizune. "How can you tell that?"

"The fire didn't completely consume the corpse, so some of the chakra paths were still intact."

"So a missing nin," Genma said. "Not anyone you recognized?"

"No," Shizune answered simply. "It wasn't." It wasn't Orochimaru or Kabuto or Sasuke. It wasn't any of the high profile missing ninja from Konoha.

"It was someone good enough to hurt Kakashi before Kakashi killed him," Pakkun said.

"Could have been Iruka," said Raidou. "Maybe the guy ambushed them and Iruka hung back and made the kill."

"Not likely. He's a teacher," Pakkun snorted.

"He's a ninja," Genma said quietly, "And so are you. And you are seriously underestimating him."

ooo

They reached the clearing where the medical shelter stood before the sun was above the trees. A sun that was fighting with scudding clouds and sudden, drenching downpours. All four of them were cold and tired, but the closer they got, the more frantic the little dog had become, scenting Kakashi's blood stronger and stronger. It was all they could do to hold Pakkun back, Raidou hanging gamely on to the dog's collar, as they approached the building.

Genma waved his partners to a halt under the trees at the edge of the clearing.. With a kunai in hand, as silent as a wisp of smoke, he approached the cabin and peered in one of the grimy windows. After a moment's surveillance he straightened with a frown, pocketed the weapon, then strode boldly to the door, signaling the others to join him.

"Iruka-sensei?" he called. "It's Shiranui Genma. I'm here with medical help."

Before he could say more, Pakkun tore loose from Raidou's grasp and barreled through the door, skidding to a stop next to Kakashi's inert, blanket-covered body on the soiled mattress.

Iruka looked up from his his spot next to Kakashi with shock and fear and relief all mingling in his face.

"G- Genma-san?"

Iruka stood, and Genma could see how pale and worn the other man was. Iruka was motioning to a short woman in a neutral medic's uniform, telling her these were allies, and Genma breathed a sigh of relief. So Kakashi and Iruka had had medical help, at least some sort, and even better, Iruka was standing on his own feet. They'd found both parties they were searching for, and at least one of them looked relatively unharmed.

Shizune elbowed past him and knelt next to Kakashi, firing off rapid questions at the other medic, while Pakkun paced helplessly at his master's head. Genma took one more look at the room, signaled to Raidou and took hold of one of Iruka's arms.

"Come on sensei," he said, steering Iruka towards the door. "I think you probably need a break. Shizune can work on Kakashi while you debrief Raidou and me about what happened."

Raidou took Iruka's other arm, casting a glance at the agitated dog. "Think it's alright to leave him in here?" he asked.

"Shizune will keep him in line," Genma answered. "He's smart enough not to get in the way."

"Go. I have it under control," Shizune said curtly, turning back to her task almost immediately.

Iruka twisted, trying to keep his eyes on Kakashi. "I should stay, too..."

"No," Genma insisted firmly, "you need to come with us and tell us what happened. Shizune will be fine. Kakashi will be fine." He prayed silently that he wasn't spewing a pack of lies at Iruka. Kakashi didn't look in the least fine; he looked already dead.

ooo

Hours later, Kakashi was a little shocked, though he didn't let it show on his face, to feel a very old, familiar chakra next to him, strong and warm. It was so... comforting. He turned to look, and indeed, standing beside him was a familiar ebony-eyed Uchiha ninja, ridiculous goggles perched on his head as usual. But something was not quite right about him.

"Geez, Obito, how come you're so short?"

"Duh! It's not like I got to keep growing after those Rock assholes offed me!"

"Oh, yeah, I guess not, huh." Kakashi winced at the ease with which Obito referred to his tragic demise. He covered his discomfort in another old, familiar way: by teasing. "You still look like you've got a permanent case of bed head." It was so second nature to tease, the words came from Kakashi's mouth as if it had been twenty minutes, not twenty years, since he had seen his teammate.

Obito just grinned. "You're one to talk! Take a look at yourself!" Obito was pointing, but not, Kakashi, was surprised, at his face. He pointed to a man asleep on a pallet on the floor across the room.

Walking over to him, Kakashi peered at - his own face. Unmasked, deathly pale, with an ugly bruise disfiguring his right cheek. And, as Obito had pointed out, major bed head. Sitting against the wall next to him, apparently asleep, was Iruka, who, despite his slumber, looked tense and drawn.

The man in the bed - himself, Kakashi supposed - was surrounded by medical paraphernalia: IV bags and tubes, bloodied bandages, translucent green oxygen hose, elegant little gold-capped scrolls with freshly painted sutras trailing from them onto the floor around the bed.

"So, I'm dead? You've come to escort me to the next world?"

"Not yet, idiot, don't be so melodramatic! Can't you see you're still breathing?"

"Aa. Good. Then why are you here?" It somehow seemed the most natural thing in the world to be hovering over his own body, bantering with his dead teammate.

"Well, Rin-chan and I drew straws, and I lost." The raven-haired teenager snorted with laughter.

Kakashi looked blankly at Obito.

"OK, no seriously, I'm here to kick your ass." Obito swiped a ghostly foot through the body on the floor, laughing hysterically at his own joke.

Kakashi reached for his back pocket. If Obito wasn't going to explain himself, he'd just read a little _Icha Icha_ while he waited for his friend to settle down.

"That's not gonna help, you know. Despite what everyone probably thinks, your perverted book's not actually a part of your spirit, Kaka-chan."

The use of his baby name startled him. Since when did Obito ever call him chan?

"That got your attention, ne? Your mom told me to call you that." Obito grinned.

"My... mom?"

"Uh-huh. She's nice. Really loves you, you know? She was totally bummed she had to die when you were so little. It's really a shame you never got to know her."

Kakashi just stared. His situation finally hit him, and it was beyond surreal.

"Yeah," Obito continued, smiling. "Actually, a lot of people wanted to be the one to bring you this message, but we talked it over, and I was the best choice."

"You... talked it over..." Kakashi echoed faintly. He felt lightheaded. He was, despite a lifetime spent cultivating a blasé imperviousness, seriously freaked out.

"Tell me about him." Obito interrupted, and gestured to Iruka, his voice suddenly quiet, serious, mature.

The change in his companion's demeanor caught Kakashi's attention, and he replied just as soberly. "He's my lover. And my best friend. Iruka's... He's a really good person; one of the best people I've ever known. Like you and Rin and Sensei. You'd like him, Obito."

"Mmm." Obito smiled gently, nodding. "Do you know how he feels about you?"

"Uh, well... ahh... He likes me well enough, I guess. I mean, I think I confuse and annoy him a little sometimes, but he usually doesn't let that get in the way." Kakashi looked thoughtfully at Iruka, as if he were searching for something. "Aaa... I think he thinks I'm smart, but kind of a pain-in-the-ass... And I guess I'm good-looking enough for him, a decent lover..." Kakashi trailed off. He'd never really thought about it clearly enough to put it into words.

"Keep going," Obito prompted.

Kakashi hesitated, his voice dropping to just above a whisper. "Sometimes..." He looked away from Obito, stared hard at the floor, at Iruka's feet. "Sometimes, I can't really understand what he sees in me. Why he would want to be with a guy like me..."

"That's what I thought. There's something you need to know. I'll show you."

The room swirled and faded from view. Kakashi blinked, trying to clear his vision.

"Just drift, Kakashi-kun," He heard Obito's voice, but couldn't see him anymore. "Let yourself _feel_ this."

Kakashi found himself looking at himself, sitting in Iruka's apartment on his tan leather couch. He was dazzlingly handsome. Tall, strong, muscular but lithe, relaxed on the couch with a kind of boneless elegance, radiating sexuality.

"_Feel_ it," came Obito's voice in his ear.

He was lying in Iruka's bed, resting within protective, masculine arms. Drowsy but content. He felt so _safe. _Insanely, deliriously _happy_. He lifted warm, tan fingertips to trace lazy patterns on the sweat-sheened chest next to him, whose silvery hair and pattern of scars told Kakashi it must be his own. He heard Iruka's voice echoing in his head, 'I can't believe how much I love this man. I can't believe he really loves me. This is too good to be true...' Despite the words, the feeling was one of pure joy. "Kashi," he heard Iruka's drowsy voice, "If I died right now, I'd die a happy man."

The scene blurred and shifted. He was sitting behind the mission desk, holding an origami-folded slip of paper containing a mission assignment. It was a beautiful chrysanthemum-patterned washi envelope in elegant shades of red and white, flecked with silver. A special S-rank mission, he could tell by the elaborateness of its wrapping. He didn't want to let go of the envelope, didn't want to give it to the uniformed jounin in front of him. He wanted to grab the man's hand and hold on tight. He trailed his fingertips along the half-gloved hand that was reaching out to receive the assignment as he reluctantly passed the paper over and looked up.

Once again Kakashi saw himself transfigured. He was taller, handsomer, more powerful, more graceful. He felt a mixture of protectiveness and fear fighting with a strong sense of duty, heard Iruka's voice in his head again 'Just give him the envelope, baka. Tsunade-sama wouldn't give him a mission beyond him. There probably _aren't_ any missions beyond him. It's _Hatake Kakashi,_ for heaven's sake. If he can't complete a mission and return safely from it, no-one can.'

The Kakashi in front of him looked into the his eyes and smiled, drew his hand lazily away, taking the envelope with him. Stepping back from the table, he pulled the folded paper apart, withdrew the printed slip within.

Watching through Iruka's eyes, Kakashi recognized the envelope, the moment; remembered reading those orders: they were the ones for the mission he had been returning from.

"Mission Rank: S - AA

"Personnel: 009720 Hatake Kakashi, Jounin

"Destination: Kurosa Point, Lightning Country

"Mission Objective and Details:"

Where the mission's specifics should have been listed was the Hokage's untidy scrawl, "See me."

Kakashi watched himself read, then look up from the paper and sigh. He could see himself thinking, 'Aa, it's going to be one of _those_ missions. And a solo, too.' He remembered hoping Tsunade would at least grant him the grace of a last night in Konoha before heading out.

A sexy baritone drawl came from the mouth of the Kakashi standing before him, holding the opened mission envelope, "Think you might be free tonight?" The tone was light, his lips curved up under his mask, but somehow the smile didn't quite reach his eye.

Icy fear clamped down on him, taking his breath away. In Iruka's tight voice inside his head he heard, 'If Kakashi is willing to proposition me in the mission room, he must think it's an assignment he might not return from...'

"You understand, right?" Obito's voice was gentle. " This is how Iruka sees you, feels about you."

He was in Iruka's apartment again, alone. He looked at the calendar. In Iruka's neat script, in the square around Tuesday was written, "Ka comes home!" Iruka's tan fingertip reached out, touched the Tuesday square, then slid to the right, stopping on Thursday. He heard Iruka say aloud, "Kakashi, where are you?" and felt a kind of emptiness, an aching despair. "Don't think that way, Umino," he heard Iruka admonish himself, "If you think bad things, bad things will happen."

Time flowed forward again. He watched through Iruka's eyes as the last of his students left the classroom. He was_ not_ thinking about Kakashi, _not_ worrying about him, dammit. A clawed foot scratched at the door and a shiny black nose nudged it open. One of Kakashi's dogs! The tan and white, fox-like little dog rushed over to Iruka, wagging her curled tail, smiling a big doggy smile. She put her front paws on Iruka's knee, offering her neck to be scratched, the note attached to her collar to be removed. Iruka took the note and laughed aloud, flooded with relief. There, in Kakashi's strong hand were the best words Iruka had ever read, "I'll be on the Azumatora, meet me." And that silly, wonderful heno heno moheji scarecrow face.

Kakashi went along for the ride as Iruka rushed around making preparations to go. His lover's excited happiness, his longing to be with Kakashi was intoxicating. He was astounded at how completely he seemed to be at the center of Iruka's universe. Everything Iruka did was with Kakashi in mind. The jounin listened, mesmerized, to Iruka's inner chatterbox at the store on his way home from the Academy, "Let's see, Kashi likes these salted plums, right? And I'll get him some of those chocolate mushroom things. Better pick up something nutritious, too - he's probably been living on field rations." Iruka's tender motherliness was unexpected, endearing. "Now which sake was Kashi going on about the other day? _Shirakawago_ something? Here it is. And I'll get him some milk-tea. Heh heh..." Kakashi gasped at the powerful, playful lustiness he felt jolt through Iruka.

When he got home, Iruka bathed for Kakashi, shaved for Kakashi, rubbed lotion into calluses for Kakashi, "Gotta have soft hands to rub my lover's back with, ne?" he told his grinning reflection in the bathroom mirror.

"This isn't just infatuation, either. You realize that, don't you? You've been together how long? Three, four years?" Obito was gentle but firm. It was important that Kakashi _get_ this. He probably wasn't going to get a second chance.

Another sudden shift in perspective, and Kakashi was looking at himself on the road, subtle swirl of chakra dissipating as he materialized in front of Iruka. He felt the chuunin's emotions in a fast-paced rush: Shock at the sudden appearance, ecstatic delight at their reunion, concern about the jounin's worn-looking state, absolute horror at having hurt him with his embrace, fear that the injury was serious, relief when it didn't seem to be too bad, blushing delight and arousal at Kakashi's suggestive remarks, wry superiority mingled with concern, knowing his lover was trying to, but couldn't, hide the truth about his condition from him.

"Oh, he reads you like a book, you know." Obito remarked.

"Yeah," Kakashi replied in a hushed, wonder-filled voice, "I can see that..."

The next scene was a shock. He was watching himself through Iruka's eyes as he fought with Shida Akumaru. Damn, they were really going at it. He started to appraise his moves, his technique, when Obito cut him off. "Don't analyze this Kakashi, you need to feel what _Iruka_ is feeling."

What Iruka was feeling was horrible. Terrible, terrible fear watching the deadly contest between two powerful jounin. Gut-wrenching anxiety as he realized that they were evenly matched. A creeping dread, thinking about Kakashi's fractured ribs, his torn-up wrists, his state of exhaustion. And overlying it all, the deepest, darkest self-hatred, kindled by Akumaru's acid words, "Oh, your pretty little boy-toy led me straight to you..."

Kakashi felt another disorienting swirl and he found himself standing next to Obito again, watching Iruka tend to his fallen form after the battle. They observed in silence as Iruka bit back nausea while he tried to keep Kakashi's innards from spilling out of the horrific gash across his belly, held him while he retched and shook, pulled the poisoned kunai from the injured man's ribs, dressed his wounds and tried to stop the bleeding. Iruka's movements were calm and competent as he tended Kakashi, then stripped the clothing and weapons from the body of Akumaru and set the corpse aflame. The only betrayal of his emotional response was the trail of silent tears sliding down his face. Watching him manage the disastrous scene, Kakashi was filled with admiration and compassion.

"He's really something else, you know that, Obito?"

"Yeah, I do."

The world jumped and they were back in the medical cabin. Kakashi's body lay on the bed, pale and still as death; Iruka knelt beside him, doing something to the bandage on his abdomen. Most of the medical apparatus was missing, though.

"What...?" Kakashi started.

"Before," answered Obito. "Just experience it."

With a vague sliding feeling, Kakashi found himself back inside Iruka's body again. He heard his own voice rasp out Iruka's name; felt Iruka turn to answer, lifting a lantern to illuminate his face; saw himself start to shudder in reaction to the bright light. It had been one thing to suffer the wracking convulsions, it was quite another to watch. He could feel Iruka panicking, convinced that he had caused the seizure, horrified by the sight of Kakashi's tortured, jerking body, and desperately afraid that the gasping, gurgling breath would stop altogether. When the seizure relented, Iruka immediately attended to the now profusely bleeding belly wound. Kakashi felt the surge of chakra through Iruka's arms as he compressed the wound, felt Iruka's terror that it would never stop bleeding. And when despite his fear, it finally did, he had only a moment of relief before the unconscious man began to cough and choke, sending another jolt of panic through the chuunin.

Iruka gagged at the sight of foamy blood bubbling between his lover's lips, then steeled himself and wiped the mess away, turning Kakashi gently on his side so he wouldn't re-inhale the fluid he cleared from his lungs. The chuunin was shaking with anxiety, desperately afraid that the most important person in the world to him was dying before his eyes, and he was powerless to stop it. When the injured man started to groan and writhe in pain, Iruka quickly stood and ransacked the shelter, searching for medicine in cabinets and shelves. Returning to his suffering companion with morphine in hand, he administered the pain-dulling drug, watched it take effect, then let the bottle and syringe drop to the floor. Feeling utterly devastated, he took one of Kakashi's limp hands in his own, and sobbed.

"He thinks he did this to you."

Kakashi found himself back in the present, standing once again next to his boyhood companion and fellow ninja, watching a pale and broken-hearted Iruka sleep fitfully next to his own ravaged body. He wanted desperately to put his arms around his lover, to comfort him, rock him like a baby, tell him there was no way that any of it was his fault. Kakashi was filled with aching sorrow. He knew exactly how Iruka felt, not just because Obito had shown him, but because it was the way _he_ had felt about _Obito's_ death for many, many years.

"Kakashi." Obito's voice was quiet, filled with compassion. "You didn't kill me. And Iruka didn't do this to you."

"Why...? Why are you showing me this?" Kakashi's voice was ragged with emotion.

"Because I couldn't tell you before, when _I_ was dying. The way you feel about Iruka right now, that's how I feel about you."

Kakashi swallowed, unable to speak.

"And because you have an opportunity to do something that I did not," Obito continued. "I know you're tired. I know it hurts. I know it will be next to impossible. But you have to _not_ die. You have to get back in your body, Kakashi, and make it keep on living. You are not finished with your work in this world."

Kakashi nodded numbly.

"Don't let Iruka spend the next twenty years of his life thinking he betrayed and killed his closest friend. You know what that's like, and I know you wouldn't wish that misery on him."

He felt Obito's presence starting to fade, and turned to reach out to him. "Obito I.."

"I know. Don't worry about it. Go _on_ with your life, Kakashi...

Kakashi could feel himself being drawn agonizingly back into his battered body.

"Oh, and one last thing," Obito's voice sounded boyish and playful again, "How's that eye working out for you?" He gave a slow, dramatic wink, then cracked a huge smile. Kakashi couldn't help but laugh.

"Yeah, that's the way I like to see you, Kakashi-kun," Obito said. "Happy."

_END Chapter 13_

Author's Note:

Extra special thanks to my beta readers and cheering section (in reverse alphabetical order): Winter of our Discontent, Telosphilos, Messy Peaches, Laura Aoshi, Kilerkki, Kaja, Hey Diddle Diddle, Carcinya, Bitter Eloquence, and Bite the Hand That Feeds.

This chapter has been in development since I started this story, and I know I've shared other scraps of it with other beta readers. If I missed your name on this acknowledgment, forgive me.

As you can probably tell, _It's Nothing_ is finally nearing its conclusion.


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